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3106038 tn?1346813169

Ugh!!

My son is almost 3 weeks old. And I live with my boyfriend and his parents. His parents barely speak any English and I don't speak Spanish. Eer since we came home with Jude they won't leave him alone. I undertstood at first because its exciting but it's getting out of hand. Every single time I put him down to sleep they pick him up and mess with him until he wakes up. And now from being so used to sleeping in their arms he refuses to sleep in his bassinet and cries all night. I have asked my boyfriend to talk to them and he won't because he says I'm being rude and basically just want to "hog him"
Today I put him in his crib after he are and fell asleep and he was doing great finally and then my boyfriends mother comes in an says he's freezing (it's nice in the house and he had a light  blanket) and picks him up and starts wrapping him up even more and she woke him up and says "oh he doesn't want to sleep" I don't like having to confront people but I'm so sick of it so I said I really want him to try an sleep in there and she just smiled an walked off with him and put him in his swing.
So I asked ny boyfriend again to talk to them and he said he doesn't want to.
I'm getting so frustrate I don't know what to do, or how to go about it without causing problems between me and his parents.
13 Responses
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Avatar universal
I know what you mean . It ***** when you can't talk to them but your bf should understand where your coming from an not be so offensive when it comes to his parents. You and your baby are his family now and whatever bothers you he should take in and put himself in your shoes tell him how you feel like really sit down with him.
Helpful - 0
3106038 tn?1346813169
They don't really speak English so trying to tell them stuff is hard. Which is why I want my boyfriend to talk to them but I guess I can just say no and they'll hve to understand that.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Put your foot down! The more you let them get away with it the more there going to think its ok to do so, I know its hard facing your inlaws and telling them how it is but if your partner won't do it then you need to make rules tell them when hes in bed leave him in bed and don't touch him. Make the rules hes your baby not there's your only being honest with them and sure they might be abit rattled that you told them to back of but they'll learn to accept it. Good luck x
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Put your foot down! The more you let them get away with it the more there going to think its ok to do so, I know its hard facing your inlaws and telling them how it is but if your partner won't do it then you need to make rules tell them when hes in bed leave him in bed and don't touch him. Make the rules hes your baby not there's your only being honest with them and sure they might be abit rattled that you told them to back of but they'll learn to accept it. Good luck x
Helpful - 0
4476664 tn?1361632949
Someone I know was in a very similar situation. Just had a baby, lived in her boyfriends/babys fathers parents house and was walked all over when it came to the choices and decisions she had when it came to raising her child. It wasnt until she left with the baby and got her own place did her mamas boy of a boyfriend step up and let his family know that he now had is OWN family that he had to take care of and tend to. They backed off and everyone gets along just fine. You have to put your foot down, this is your child. And he should support you, whether you guys have somewhere else to go or not. I cant imagine trying to raise my child in someone elses house.
Helpful - 0
4654011 tn?1357643122
You just have to tell them. And I'm sorry, but your boyfriend is a mamas boy and isn't standing up for his family is a load of bull. I couldn't tolerate that, but that's me. Just tell them politely that he needs to know when he sleeps its in his bed, the occasional nap in your arms maybe, but he needs to be there mostly. And when they barge in just say what are you doing? Your a mom you understand your baby's needs more than them. Don't kiss butt Hun you'll be ok:)
Helpful - 0
4981320 tn?1362750953
U should really put your foot down and let them know You Are the mother and  you don't want the baby get too used to being in arms , it's going to make it tougher for u . It's hard , but if you don't do it now  its going to be only harder later . Good luck
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Sounds similar to my mother in law, except Baby is due may 22, and she already claims, she has to change her Work schedule, she's going to have the Baby every weekend, and the whole summer,uh uh, I told my boyfriend ok it's her second grandchild, and this is your first, she don't run anything but her mouth, she matters well say I'm giving her my Baby, ok I got a set of boy and girl twin who are 2, and the first pregnancy is always the biggest to the family for some reason.. But lordy, what's gotten into the in laws...
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Omg your being to nice. They had there time already with there kids this is your baby do whatever bothers you you should say something
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Oh man. Is it possible to put him down in a room where you could lock the door? Maybe try making a "baby sleeping" sign on the door. Your the mom don't be afraid to stand up for yourself they will understand
Helpful - 0
3106038 tn?1346813169
I wouldn't have anywhere to go if I wanted to leave. And if I just snap I don't want to cause problems because I know my boyfriend wouldn't take my side and then it would just be me in a house with everyone mad at me.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I had this same problem nd I finally snapped. They finally got the point. You will probably have to stand up for yourself or tell them that since they can't respect you as the mother you can move nd take baby somewhere you feel he can get the proper sleep nd you the proper respect.
Helpful - 0
4774515 tn?1359650004
I would give the bf an ultimatum...either he talks to his parents or u and jude are out. You two are the parents and it is definitely not "hogging" him bc u want him to sleep in his bed during naps!
Helpful - 0

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