venting

[haleyfayee]

I'm so alone it hurts. The boy I thought was the man of my dreams is out ******* everything that walks, he's even caught a disease, genital herpes, so I know I can't ever go back there, but he's in my dreams still, I'm having his son for crying out loud. I use to be a completely different person, and this child has changed me so much in just 26 weeks. He went to the gender appointment at 20 weeks but havebt heard a word from him. When I had complications with baby and went to the er, I called and he yelled and screamed at me denying his child, then put some chick on the phone. I try so hard to be strong for Kamden and I, but I'm so miserable. I never in a million years imagined my life being the way it is. I've never been in love with anyone other then him, he's been my only sexual partner ever, and he dents his child?! I ran away with him, left my family, my life, everything to move to fl and got pregnant. Now he hates me. The things he says to me you wouldn't even begin to imagine. I'm so alone it hurts. I cry myself to sleep every night.

[adoremadelyn]

What a ******* ******* ! ugh I swear I hate men like that, you don't deserve to be treated like that by the father of your baby, he should at least have respect for you & stand up to he's actions.. I went through the same thing with the father of my first child , he was also my first & I was too inlove with him at the time to realize how much of a waste of time he was . I eventually got over him & now I think to myself what did I ever see in him ?. The only thing I dont regret about that relationship was my daughter. Right now I'm with a wonderful man that would do anything for me, my daughter & our unborn baby... Theres somebody out there that would appreciate you , hes not worth your time . Just try to distract yourself & think about what most important right now which is you & your baby. Also dont call him or give him the attention , let him be the one to look for you & call you.. he will eventually get curious ,come around & hopefully be there for hes kid .

[lala__lanni]

I'm glad we were able to cheer you up some.  Yay I love this app!

[haleyfayee]

Oh every little thing that happens, you ladies will be the first to know, that's a for sure thing! Haha. Thank you allll so much. My crying has stopped for the night. (:

[lala__lanni]

You need to file for child support and let them know what he's saying. That way when u do get the DNA test and it says he's the father he can't for anything or have any rights because he denied him first and threatened to take him away from you for no really sad on just to be mean.  Don't worry you will be a great mother no one loves there child like a mother does we have spent way more time wutj them it's something a dad can't understand.  Don't let him scare you. Scare him by agreeing to the test to prove him wrong and make him pay

[lala__lanni]

Thank you and OK that is good have good time scratch that a GREAT time lol. All of my friends were the same all I have is this app and my mom. Well he wasn't good for you anyway no man should let his womanwalk anywhere especially if he has a car and she's pregnant. You dodged a bad daddy bullet think of it like that.  You will find someone so much better you womy believe it when u have keep your head up and keep us updated lovely

[haleyfayee]

I've asked him if he'd sign his rights over, he told me he'd ratheer die then do so just bc it's something I want. He thinks he's going to be mean and not care ab him while he forms inside of me, but once he comes out he wants a DNA, then he says he's taking him from me, and that I'm going to be a horrid mother bc mine was. He has built up a lot of fear inside of me. I know he can't take my child away, but I just don't get him, I never know what he's going to do. That's why I just don't want to tell him I've had Kamden. I wanna just run away with him, that's why I am terrified Kamden will hate me when he gets older.

[haleyfayee]

I truly love this app more and more every day, you people are beyond amazing! I have love in my heart for you ladies, and your kind words. My brother is taking me to the zoo tomorrow, my Disney world! Haha. I'm excited. I mean everyday isn't misserable, I try so hard to push threw most days, I just have days like this that last for weeks. All the friends I use to have were only party buddies, they're still to busy parting to sit down and talk to me. My little brother is my best friend, but he's not someone I just go up to and talk ab this, he hates the ex every since he threw me out of his car at 18 weeks and made me walk home, 5.6 miles, at 3 am.

[lala__lanni]

No he won't hate you his father chose not yo be there for him not you. You made an effort and told him about his child many times and that's what you have explain to your son when he's old enough to ask about him it's not your fault sweetie don't feel li e that OK.

[alyjay2015]

That is tough dealing w a heartbreak while pregnant! I went through a tough one myself a couple years ago and it took such a toll on me. But you just haft to realize he is not worth the pain or your unhappiness.. There is tons of men who would appreciate the person you are ! Right now you focus on getting your life back together and when you start to feel down just go baby shopping (: that always cheers me up! And if he doesn't want his son then get him to sign his rights over so u don't have to deal with him. Right now this problem seems like it'll never get better but down the road looking back you'll be  wondering  what the heck u we're thinking to be upset about such a piece of crap like him! Haha ik that's what I thought! It will all get better u just got to stay strong and don't let him know he Hurt u!

[Hannah_sweg]

I wish there was some magical thing to say to make you feel better. But the reality of this is peace will come in time. If you have some one close thay dies, do you ever get over it in just a day? A week? A month? Not usually, and this is the same way because it is a form of grieving.
You feel like you have lost everything when in reality you have gained the whole world.
You have a son, and so many possibilities now, and even if you dont want them right now youll be glad you got away and were able to experience life away from some one who was going to hold you back.
Over the summer I was so broken. I slept with my mom and cried myaelf to sleep and I vould hardly handle myself. Now every day it gets better. Dreams of him dont make me cry, they make me happy actually, even though its a sad way im okay eith them. And you will get to that point too. And you will pass that point one day and be completely free. Remember the sadness is only for a season, and when the next one comes you will be on top of tge world. Right now worry about baby and yourself. Buy yourself something nice, try to make some new friends, prepare for baby, pick out names, write your son letters, explore new music, make art, anything yoi feel led to do. Just got to force yourself sometimes.
Please, force yourself.
Some days I ferl like balling up in bed and crying instead of seeing a friend, but when I get there life is a little better for a little while.
Do not let this keep you from living.
You can and will make it

[haleyfayee]

Well once I found out at 10 weeks we moved back home to Tennessee, that's when it began to fall apart. He's one of those m.m.a fighting morons, that's why we ran away to Florida. Ah I'm so excited to hold my baby Kamden in December!! Child support? I asked him the other week if he even remembered my due date, he said why would I remember a day that I don't even want to happen. So I've decided o don't want child support, I don't want him on the birth certificate, I don't even wanna tell him when I go it to have him. But I feel like the worst mother ever by keeping her son away from his dad. I mean no, he has nothing to offer him, literally nothing at all, but every boy/girl needs a father to show them things. I'm so lost at this point at what's best for Kamden. I know I can give him everything I have to offer, going back to collage, I work, I have my own home, ive bought everything for him. I have so much love. But won't he hate me when he grows up and finds out his father isn't around bc of me

[lala__lanni]

I know how u feel with my first pregnancy my boyfriend asked me who I was sleeping with because at the time we had just broke up like 3 days before I found out. He knew he was my only partner because he was my first and he didn't come to the first appointment or even call. He was with another girl and he would call from her phone sometimes if he did call and I was so hurt I stopped hanging with my friends for him and the only family I had left was my mom. But for the Baby it's not good to be so sad sometimes just think of how you have a son on the way and how much fun your going to have with him because when your happy the baby is happy. It's OK to cry because it hurts I understand. Go out and look at baby clothes if he doesn't want anything to for with you house make him wish he did by being strong for your baby boy and responsible. Sometimes the guys are scared of change so they run but don't let him stop u from enjoying a beautiful blessing.you know it's his and he knows to he's scared. My boyfriend was to and he realized that and apologized it took some time for us to get back to nnormal but now we are having our second baby he has changed alot. I hope you feel better and find someone who cares about you and your baby boy if he doesn't change.

[Nessaa23]

Omg, im soo sorry, and i know it might not help but im here we all are if you wanna talk n vent . I also live in florida.
Hes an idiot,like most men but hey atleast u got a blessing out of it. You just need to worry about you and your baby. Forget him, make child support handle him. What goes around comes around!