Aa
Am I wrong for moving out of state
My son or daughters father kicked me out his house now I'm living be couch to couch and he put his hands on me and I live in San Diego and my family in Texas offered to help me and the baby I got a plane ticket to leave on Monday when should I tell him ? When I'm at the airport or when I'm actually in Texas
first of all, the baby is not even born yet. he has NO legal rights over the child yet. there is no proof that he is even the father until it is born and he or she requests a dna test.
she has every right to move where she wants to at this point. when the baby is born she should file for sole custody right away, even though legally she will automatically have custody. it would be up to him to prove he is the father and fight for visitation.
make sure you have legally documented the abuse. file a restraining order or make a police report.
it is very important to document EVERYTHING
she has every right to move where she wants to at this point. when the baby is born she should file for sole custody right away, even though legally she will automatically have custody. it would be up to him to prove he is the father and fight for visitation.
make sure you have legally documented the abuse. file a restraining order or make a police report.
it is very important to document EVERYTHING
I would not tell him and I would make a police report and say I was scared and he was violent already. That way he can not get custody of the child or visits alone with the child.... never know these days what people will do to your baby...
If that happened to me, I wouldn't be the one picking up the phone. On the contrary, IF he has your family's number/address I would let all and any communication come from him.
The most important thing you have to do for yourself, is to NOT back peddle and return to such a man (IF he truly is despicable and you did not cause yourself to be told to leave). It's okay to make a mistake, whomever it was that made it, the only important thing to consider is whether a life lesson has been learned so as not to have to repeat the outcome.
Maybe I'm missing something, but I didn't see that you posted that he put his hands on you. You mentioned nothing of the argument that led to him asking you to leave. Maybe if i look at the back ground there will be other posts that fill in those blanks. It's hard to judge from just what you've said without background.
One thing though, A little boy , a young man, an adolescent male WILL suffer without a close relationship with his father, no doubt, (but they will suffer more with a terrible example of fatherhood). YOU NEED TO BE VERY AWARE OF ANY RED FLAGS WITH MEN IN THE FUTURE so you're not in this position again with your children being the victim of your choices. Best of luck in Texas. Wow. He's a lucky little boy and I pray he will turn into one of the greatest men in your life!!
The most important thing you have to do for yourself, is to NOT back peddle and return to such a man (IF he truly is despicable and you did not cause yourself to be told to leave). It's okay to make a mistake, whomever it was that made it, the only important thing to consider is whether a life lesson has been learned so as not to have to repeat the outcome.
Maybe I'm missing something, but I didn't see that you posted that he put his hands on you. You mentioned nothing of the argument that led to him asking you to leave. Maybe if i look at the back ground there will be other posts that fill in those blanks. It's hard to judge from just what you've said without background.
One thing though, A little boy , a young man, an adolescent male WILL suffer without a close relationship with his father, no doubt, (but they will suffer more with a terrible example of fatherhood). YOU NEED TO BE VERY AWARE OF ANY RED FLAGS WITH MEN IN THE FUTURE so you're not in this position again with your children being the victim of your choices. Best of luck in Texas. Wow. He's a lucky little boy and I pray he will turn into one of the greatest men in your life!!
COMMUNITY LEADER
My brother in law grew up in Lubbock and also speaks very highly of it. It's a great place to raise a child. :>)
I'm one of the few people who doesn't live in Lubbock who actually loves Lubbock. ;D The skies are a different color there. Big sky country. Prairie Dogs. And you can stand on a black tar parking lot in the afternoon in August and not be uncomfortably hot because it's so gloriously dry. There are some good public schools there, and the school district has become progressive.
How long would it take your boyfriend to even notice you're gone? He's kicked you out of his home and now you're couch surfing. I say just go, and be very grateful that you have supportive family in Lubbock.
How long would it take your boyfriend to even notice you're gone? He's kicked you out of his home and now you're couch surfing. I say just go, and be very grateful that you have supportive family in Lubbock.
COMMUNITY LEADER
By the way, if you are scared of him, don't tell him period. maybe drop him a line eventually and just say that you are with family who wants to support and help you.
Honestly, document any type of abuse. You do not want someone that could hurt your child to be able to seek visitation. although, I tell ya, I really doubt you'll have that problem. Guys who throw out the pregnant girlfriend and make them sleep on the couch are not usually going to follow someone in order to be a good dad.
Lastly, there is no law that says that a pregnant woman (you aren't married either, are you) can't move to another state. If there is visitation issues/custody arrangements, that is when the law is involved. This is state to state but there are no states that would restrict an unmarried woman's ability to move when necessary unless it is already stated in custody agreements that she can't.
good luck
Honestly, document any type of abuse. You do not want someone that could hurt your child to be able to seek visitation. although, I tell ya, I really doubt you'll have that problem. Guys who throw out the pregnant girlfriend and make them sleep on the couch are not usually going to follow someone in order to be a good dad.
Lastly, there is no law that says that a pregnant woman (you aren't married either, are you) can't move to another state. If there is visitation issues/custody arrangements, that is when the law is involved. This is state to state but there are no states that would restrict an unmarried woman's ability to move when necessary unless it is already stated in custody agreements that she can't.
good luck
I would talk to someone in a legal forum.You need to know if you should somehow document what he's done to you. Sounds like he's a jerk. What you don't want is a spiteful vindictive jerk. I don't mean to scare you, but please get some real legal advice. Someone in your family might even know a divorce lawyer that can help. Good luck on your move.
Thank you so much! That really helped me a lot . I know it's not easy but I'm willing to try and I will most def let him come see the baby with no doubt !
COMMUNITY LEADER
You gotta do what you've gotta do. Raising a baby on your own is really hard and you have a family willing to help you. A family that wants to know your baby. That's a great thing to have! Yes, move to be close to them.
I do think it is always a bit sad for a child when they aren't going to have the opportunity to know their other parent. This 'does' matter to the emotional state of kids especially as they get older. There comes a grade in elementary school that kids are VERY aware that of the fact that they've not got a parent in their life and it really hurts them.
But being on your own, far from your family in this situation as you are now trumps worrying about that down the road. I would allow this man to visit the baby if he comes to Texas (some dads will travel to have a relationship with their child), I would keep in contact via writing and pictures and whatnot so that the dad has some kind of knowledge to his child and then you can show the child that dad cared if he ever writes back or anything.
Babies are easy. Kids are much more difficult with the emotions that they have. So, just plan ahead for that but do what is necessary now to get by.
good luck
I do think it is always a bit sad for a child when they aren't going to have the opportunity to know their other parent. This 'does' matter to the emotional state of kids especially as they get older. There comes a grade in elementary school that kids are VERY aware that of the fact that they've not got a parent in their life and it really hurts them.
But being on your own, far from your family in this situation as you are now trumps worrying about that down the road. I would allow this man to visit the baby if he comes to Texas (some dads will travel to have a relationship with their child), I would keep in contact via writing and pictures and whatnot so that the dad has some kind of knowledge to his child and then you can show the child that dad cared if he ever writes back or anything.
Babies are easy. Kids are much more difficult with the emotions that they have. So, just plan ahead for that but do what is necessary now to get by.
good luck
If it were me, I wouldn't tell him. To hell with him, but that's just me. Under no circumstances is it ok for him to put his hands on you especially when you're pregnant!
You're not wrong at all. And I wouldn't tell him until you're there and don't tell him what city or your address. Or even who you're with
When your in texas but dont tell him what state your in...but i applaud you on leaving him....i wouldnt even tell him but thats just me
Thank you ladies I really appreciate it I'm 22 with my first child I'm 19 weeks & I find out what I'm having tmwr morning :)
He would be lucky if I told him at all, he wasn't too concerned of ur whereabouts when he put u out or concerned about ur childs safety when he was putting his hands on u. I would tell him when he makes it his business to contact u, ur the one carrying his child & I don't think u owe him anything at this point.
If that's your only option you aren't wrong for doing so. I personally would do the same thing. It's just that when your baby is born, he can take you to court if he wants. Technically you cannot take your child out of state away from the father unless you have custody of the child. They see it as kidnapping if he decides he wants to fight it. I would tell him beforehand. Right now, it's okay. Because baby isn't born yet and you're pregnant. But he can try and fight for his rights once baby is born. I hope you get it figured out. You definitely don't need to be around him. Praying for you!
When you are actually in texas . Men do crazy things and if he put his hands on you once he will do it again
I wouldn't tell him till your in texas. Since he put his hands on you I wouldn't tell him exactly where.
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