Aa
Failing in Asia
Sorry this is kind of a long story so I will try to make it as brief as possible.
Successful American male, earning 6 figures, marries an Asian girl. Girl insists on moving back to her home country. Husband sends his wife to Asia at least 4 months out of the year to visit home. Still not good enough.... Wife stipulates move or divorce.
Husband can not survive in Asia, does not speak the language. Eventually a baby is born. The wife really starts to make strong demands or returning home. So after 5 years of marriage in the US, couple moves to Asia. Husband now works 6-7 days a week, as opposed to 4.5 days a week in America. Husband is required to travel often.
Family now lives in the mother in laws house, husband is now treated as a fly on a wall. No longer treated as an important figure, relationship is really no longer treated as a relationship, more like an association of two individuals. No privacy, no intimacy.... Sex is minimal 3 times in 7 months to be exact. Wife states she has no intimate desires for her husband at all, and that it is not due to lack of husbands attractive looks. She states she is just sexually "TURNED OFF" period. She is not on any medications, The lack of sex within the marriage has lasted for 3 years. Husband and wife sleep in seperate rooms.
Husband, out of desperation finally had an affair.... and believes he may be in love with the other woman.
Husband does not want a divorce, does not want to lose his son, or a large amount of his wealth and in some respects still loves his wife.
This particular asian culture does support the practice of having a "minor wife" but he does not know if this could work...
He is dyeing inside.
Child has dual citizenship, without a doubt the mother would be granted custody. Wife, through her husband is already has 100% ownership of rental property which provides the income of twice the average citizen in her home country. If there was a divorce she would retain the property because foreingers can not own land in her country. She would also recieve 20% of husbands income for child support & half of all of his savings. In short, she would be extremely rich.
Advice?
Successful American male, earning 6 figures, marries an Asian girl. Girl insists on moving back to her home country. Husband sends his wife to Asia at least 4 months out of the year to visit home. Still not good enough.... Wife stipulates move or divorce.
Husband can not survive in Asia, does not speak the language. Eventually a baby is born. The wife really starts to make strong demands or returning home. So after 5 years of marriage in the US, couple moves to Asia. Husband now works 6-7 days a week, as opposed to 4.5 days a week in America. Husband is required to travel often.
Family now lives in the mother in laws house, husband is now treated as a fly on a wall. No longer treated as an important figure, relationship is really no longer treated as a relationship, more like an association of two individuals. No privacy, no intimacy.... Sex is minimal 3 times in 7 months to be exact. Wife states she has no intimate desires for her husband at all, and that it is not due to lack of husbands attractive looks. She states she is just sexually "TURNED OFF" period. She is not on any medications, The lack of sex within the marriage has lasted for 3 years. Husband and wife sleep in seperate rooms.
Husband, out of desperation finally had an affair.... and believes he may be in love with the other woman.
Husband does not want a divorce, does not want to lose his son, or a large amount of his wealth and in some respects still loves his wife.
This particular asian culture does support the practice of having a "minor wife" but he does not know if this could work...
He is dyeing inside.
Child has dual citizenship, without a doubt the mother would be granted custody. Wife, through her husband is already has 100% ownership of rental property which provides the income of twice the average citizen in her home country. If there was a divorce she would retain the property because foreingers can not own land in her country. She would also recieve 20% of husbands income for child support & half of all of his savings. In short, she would be extremely rich.
Advice?
I strongly agree with green eyed lady. You have to get your priorities straight and I know money is great and all... but freedom is priceless !
Please money isn't everything....I know. It seems to me that your biggest hang up here is the fact that she would receive half of your money and assetts. I mean think about it, NO marriage is guarranteed and if you were in the States you would probably be giving close to the same amount. Life is too short to live so unhappily. Sorry to say, I really believe that it's over. Move on and be happy.
I'm thinking its probably going to be as difficult as Jimmy says. Catch-22 for sure.
I'm curious, I don't understand. How do you know you wouldn't be able to get custody? Have you tried? My brother got full custody of his son. More and more, fathers are able to get custody. Of course the fact that he has duel citizenship makes things more difficult, I'm sure. Still I'd look into it and talk to a lawyer before you assume anything.
OK... I haven't had my cup of coffee yet this morning and have only skimmed through many of the posts.
The best solution is do what makes you happy. Honestly... you deserve better than this woman and I hope you will seriously consider moving into that apartment. If you do get the apartment, how often will you be able to see your son ? Has your wife talked to you about this ?
and give up my child.... yea, i thought about your idea already.
this is a hard nut to be in. Even if I gave up the money, I still do not have my boy. no court is going to give him to me, and also he has dual citizenship, meaning the wife can keep him here legally, and he will be protected by the gov. etc.
thanks for you time folks, truth is there is no sollution
this is a hard nut to be in. Even if I gave up the money, I still do not have my boy. no court is going to give him to me, and also he has dual citizenship, meaning the wife can keep him here legally, and he will be protected by the gov. etc.
thanks for you time folks, truth is there is no sollution
You are reading content posted in the Relationships Community
How do you keep things safer between the sheets? We explore your options.
Can HIV be transmitted through this sexual activity? Dr. Jose Gonzalez-Garcia answers this commonly-asked question.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
