Aa
Husband signed up for a dating site
So my husband just received an alert on his phone that his new account at some dating site has been set up. HE is currently sleeping so I haven't said anything about it. But since I am a curious person, I checked the site out. It's not just a normal dating site such as match or e harmony, no it a SEX dating site. It a site that you can go to to find people in your area to have SEX with!!!!! I almost woke him up and started bitching at him, but I don't want him knowing that I know he has an account at this site. I did note the website name and his login info, as it was conveniently in the alert on his phone, and put that information in the notepad of my phone for future reference. But i'm not sure what i should do, should I just confront him about it, or do I wait and see if he uses the site? But then if he actually uses the site, I don't know how I'll handle that.
But on the same hand, if i confront him about this, he may just go to a different site and hide it better. So it may be better that I know. D*mn it i'm freakin PISSED!!
So confront him, or wait it out?? Any opinions out there?
But on the same hand, if i confront him about this, he may just go to a different site and hide it better. So it may be better that I know. D*mn it i'm freakin PISSED!!
So confront him, or wait it out?? Any opinions out there?
I'm going throw the same thing, we have a 5 year old and a 7 month old. He swears on there life he never cheated. He says it was just fun toying with people heads. He would tell them he loves them and wants to ****. He says he never would do it. I don't know what to believe.
just a thought... I found a similar issue with my X H... I went online and set up a fake account, too... even used a fake picture... got him emailing her/me for awhile-- you wouldn't believe the crap he said to her ( me) about ME and how horrid things were- according to him... I finally set up a meeting with him..... My sister and I just happened to be having lunch there--very discreetly-- when he showed up looking all spiffy and very confused.... funny, he seemed very touchy.... even emailed later to ask her why she wasn't there..... Just one of the reasons-- and the proof I needed to make him my X....
Also-- if you find suspicious emails-- copy and paste it onto your word pad-- then print it out and save it... that's how I caught my H on porn sites... but that was on his web history.... I asked him about it point blank-- he denied it vehemently--- even after I told him that I KNEW he was lying.... til I handed him a COPY of what I had printed.... (saved the original in a safe place -just in case).....
Just an idea...sneaky as heii I know... but saved my current marriage-- and helped me find the truth in the 1st.....
Good luck........
Also-- if you find suspicious emails-- copy and paste it onto your word pad-- then print it out and save it... that's how I caught my H on porn sites... but that was on his web history.... I asked him about it point blank-- he denied it vehemently--- even after I told him that I KNEW he was lying.... til I handed him a COPY of what I had printed.... (saved the original in a safe place -just in case).....
Just an idea...sneaky as heii I know... but saved my current marriage-- and helped me find the truth in the 1st.....
Good luck........
Wow, that's scary that if you go into an adult website just once, you will be bombarded with contant XXX spam. For some people who enjoy these websites, oh well, but for a married couple, this could be a problem if one of the spouse is unaware and feels that hubby or wife is viewing all these websites...I've just learn something new here. Judy
just to make you feel a bit better....i get that spam crap all the time. it got so bad i almost threw my laptop out the window. lol. hubby installed a new spyware/adware thingy and allllll gone. : o) maybe he needs new spyware so that the alerts aren't being sent to him.
Just ask him? So I'm supposed to go up to him and say "Oh hey baby, did you happen to sign up for a sex dating website?" And then of course he will tell me the whole truth and nothing but the truth?
I'm sorry but how dare you tell me that he is bored with me or that my physical relationship with him is boring. I may not be the most adventurous sex fiend out there but I am open to new ideas he wants to suggest. I am personally happy with our sex life and my husband doesn't make complaints too often so as far as i can tell he is happy with it as well. And even if he was not happy with our sex life he needs to talk to ME about it. Wanting more "adventurous' sex is NOT an excuse for going out and finding it with someone else when you are in a relationship. If you want more adventurous sex or are unhappy with your relationship, you need to talk to your spouse about it and try and solve the problem, and failing that you need to get OUT of the relationship before acting like an immature horny teenager and having sex with another person.
Cheating in any form is absolutely inexcusable to me. It is NEVER OK under any circumstances.
Ok now that I've gone off on a tangent about that, on the issue at hand
Coco87:
No i do not think I am prepared to hear the answer if he has really signed up for a sex dating site, because I do not know if I could ever just forgive and forget that, especially if he went through with it and did cheat. I do not believe I have that kind of understanding and forgiveness or strength in me to give out and forget it.
Vance:
Yes I have come to the conclusion that it was just a spam email. Since I did check and see what kind of emails they would send me I know for sure it was just spam, as they have been sending me 2-3 emails a day ever since I created an account, which I have already deleted and blocked their emails for.
As to the keystroke program, yes that was put on the computer to monitor my husband's activities. I have trust issues because of things that have occurred in the past which i am aware of and I am working on, and all of which my husband is also fully aware of. He does not know about the keystroke program, and I do feel really really crappy about having it on the computer(i only added it after seeing the sex dating site alert) and I know it is sneaky and horrible and maybe a completely crazy thing to do but I needed to have the proof if i did confront him about this dating site, but as I have put it down to just spam I will not be doing that.
but the trust issue is definitely on top of my list for things to discuss when we have a talk, if we ever get to have another talk (yes, he's asleep again, he passed out about 1 1/2 hours ago watching tv) we have many issues we need to address, or at least that I feel need addressed.
Ok I think that's about all the update and responses I have in me for now.
I'm sorry but how dare you tell me that he is bored with me or that my physical relationship with him is boring. I may not be the most adventurous sex fiend out there but I am open to new ideas he wants to suggest. I am personally happy with our sex life and my husband doesn't make complaints too often so as far as i can tell he is happy with it as well. And even if he was not happy with our sex life he needs to talk to ME about it. Wanting more "adventurous' sex is NOT an excuse for going out and finding it with someone else when you are in a relationship. If you want more adventurous sex or are unhappy with your relationship, you need to talk to your spouse about it and try and solve the problem, and failing that you need to get OUT of the relationship before acting like an immature horny teenager and having sex with another person.
Cheating in any form is absolutely inexcusable to me. It is NEVER OK under any circumstances.
Ok now that I've gone off on a tangent about that, on the issue at hand
Coco87:
No i do not think I am prepared to hear the answer if he has really signed up for a sex dating site, because I do not know if I could ever just forgive and forget that, especially if he went through with it and did cheat. I do not believe I have that kind of understanding and forgiveness or strength in me to give out and forget it.
Vance:
Yes I have come to the conclusion that it was just a spam email. Since I did check and see what kind of emails they would send me I know for sure it was just spam, as they have been sending me 2-3 emails a day ever since I created an account, which I have already deleted and blocked their emails for.
As to the keystroke program, yes that was put on the computer to monitor my husband's activities. I have trust issues because of things that have occurred in the past which i am aware of and I am working on, and all of which my husband is also fully aware of. He does not know about the keystroke program, and I do feel really really crappy about having it on the computer(i only added it after seeing the sex dating site alert) and I know it is sneaky and horrible and maybe a completely crazy thing to do but I needed to have the proof if i did confront him about this dating site, but as I have put it down to just spam I will not be doing that.
but the trust issue is definitely on top of my list for things to discuss when we have a talk, if we ever get to have another talk (yes, he's asleep again, he passed out about 1 1/2 hours ago watching tv) we have many issues we need to address, or at least that I feel need addressed.
Ok I think that's about all the update and responses I have in me for now.
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