men

[mommysgirl123]

So I have a question.

My husband of five years stalked someone before he met me (which is also my sister in laws sister) I did not think much of it as this person (Stepnine) Has moved to another state but now she is back in town and I think staying.  I asked my husband not to hang out at his brothers house as that may be where she is spending some time he kinda agreed telling me that he would walk out if she showed up-I don't believe he would.

The person that came to me and told me all this stuff was my sister in law and then a week later she came to my house with her sister in the car-- I told my husband to ask her not to bring her over he agreed after awhile. I don't talk to my sister in lawmuch anymore I do not understand why she would tell me that he was stalking her then she brings her to my house a couple weeks later.  

When he stalked her he called her 10 times a day, drove past her house a couple times a day, bought her clothing or underwear and was still paying her cell phone when I met him-(she would not return the phone-- was his reason for paying her bill)

She was about to call the police when he was doing this-- is what I was told by my sister in law so it must have gotton very weird.  

Should I trust this person? I just cannot get over the fact that he stalked someone- He and I broke up 2 times he never came running to even get back together or anything I tell him that I think he liked her a lot more and he says he learned not to chase a women that they will come back to him if is meant to be -- it does not make sense that he does not even show me that he wants this relationship that badly.

What do you think??

Would you trust this person?
  

[lonewolf07]

I'm not sure if "this person" is your husband or not.  If it is, it's possible his stalking was something he only did once.  Did he tell you about the stalking - admit to it or did this information come from your SIL?  You mentioned that it was strange that your SIL would tell you about the stalking then invite the person he stalked over to your place.  No offence but maybe SIL is the problem.

The way he behaved when you split up in the past along with his other comments would probably make me not trust him either although I think an open and honest discussion with your husband would be helpful.  It might be more helpful if you both went for marriage counselling.  If he agrees to it and it's what you want it could be quite useful.



Personally, I'd give him a rope and see if he hangs himself - in the metaphoric sense.

[extrmeski]

Interesting, but you married this guy knowing that he stalked someone in his past.  You married him for better or worse.  Maybe you need to have a discussion with him to find out where HIS head is at.  Maybe he did learn his lesson, anyway give him the benefit of any doubt as if you had doubts remaining you shouldn't have gotten married.
Also in your 5 year marriage, how have things been?
People change situations change mindsets change.  Keep the past in the past and don't let it ruin your future!