No Sex anymore

[smiley733]

My wife admitted to me last night that she has no interest in Sex anymore as she has went through menopause.  I am wondering as I still love her but no sex is driving me crazy and masturbating is not enough fun.  I know this sounds self centered but would I be a creep if I found a woman who was just looking for sex and we would be eachothers outlets or should I carry on jerking off as it has been probably 3 years since I have had sex with woman and not my hand :>((

[smiley733]

I am not 60+ and if so then yes I would expect a young woman to be uninterested as I know that older women look at me and I am not interested either.  I am actually 45 and do not think about sex all the time.  I think if you read my posts you would see that I am not obsessed with sex if I was then I would have left my wife and found an airhead woman who was into sex and not into reality.  I am not a type of person who sees things and cannot decipher the feelings or other intentions.  I guess I have given you the idea just because I am frustrated with my situation that all I think about is sex.  I guess you know me better than I do so I guess you can tell me which should I do first get a vecectomy or should I just become a priest ???   Don't answer don't worry as I guess sometimes these forums can create too much controversy and so guess I will read along and try to keep my sex filled thoughts to myself.  I did not realize how upsetting this must be for this sex obsessed old man must make you feel

[mayflowers]

I'm not negative just realistic.  Lets see...you are what, like 60+ right?  A young girl is going to be hot for you?  Yeah, that'll happen.  I think you see things that aren't really there because you are so lonely and have a distorted view of women.  I've seen your posts over on the sex forum.  You have issues man, big issues.  Sex is just about all there is to you.  I think your wife knows about these issues and it turns her off hence the fact she is not interested in sex.   You probably see a women and they *could* be looking at you but thinking about what to make for dinner and in your eyes, you think she is coming on to you.  

I've had older men hit on me and it's like "Hey Gramps, keep your wrinkly old body away from me."  Believe when I tell you this, I wasn't even remotely thinking of being with these men.  I like young - well 40-ish - men.  They are experienced and their bodies are still good.  

Sorry SMILEY, you need a dose of reality here.  Either that girl was a prostitute (yes, they can dress like you describe) or she was looking at someone else or she was playing a joke on you.  No young hot chick is going to be coming on to you.  

Now, here is my advice, start reading books, take a class in math or history, help the poor, build house for the poor, feed your mind but get your mind off of sex.  It has warped you and no woman is going to take you seriously.

[smiley733]

I am not sure as she was dressed like an office lady very expensive jewelery and by the way shoes were very common sense shoes.  I wonder is this your way of turning it into a negative or do you look at everything with a negative outlook ??

[mayflowers]

She was probably a prostitute.

[smiley733]

I have never taken out my frustration on my wife and our sex life has been good for the most part as I am not pushy I would smile wink and after a good back rub or hair trimming ( wink wink ) off we would go so I guess I will have to be waiting at the end of the bed and someday make it squeak again.  thanks for all your help and suggestions.  I have another young woman make a blatant pass at me.  She sat across from me at a mall and watched me slid her shoes off and on and kept uncrossing and crossing her legs for me.  I got up and walked away even though she gave me her best pouty eyes which by the way were absoulutly incredible.  I did think of her at my next shower so guess I need to control my urges even though it was an enjoyable shower is this considered cheating ??

[slt58]

as a person who has been married 39 years and never liked sex, or had any sex drive,  I feel for your wife.  I also am going thru menopause and feel the same way. And no one can know what you're going through unless they go through it also.  I understand your frustration because my husband also is and has had to deal with this for so long.  I have tried testosteron creams and that helped alittle.  My question is was her sex drive normal for her and you before she started menopause?  Her gynocoligist could possible help but she has to want the help.  As for you I really don't know what to tell you.  My husband wouldn't even think about sex outside the marriage but then he takes his frustrations out on me and our relationship suffers. I know of many women who have done exactly what your wife has said and the husbands are relinkished to a relationship of friendship and pain.  I'm sorry.