Aa
Playstation obsession
my boyfriend is addicted to the playstation he does a few hours work In the morning comes home plays it till he has to go back to work then plays it as soon as he comes home again. We have a seven month old baby that I look after all day every day he doesn't do any house work an is extremely dirty due to working on a farm he leaves plates an glasses all around the house. And i find asking him to hold the baby whilst I go to the bathroom awkward just because he sighs every time any suggestions as to how I can stop him from playing as much.
I Will he's at work at the moment hopefully when he gets back he won't switch it on I won't say anything to him just see what he does.
I will book an appointment with my doctor see if they can help us. I do not depend on him he gives me fifty pounds a week which pays the council tax I explained to him today and he played with me and baby for about half an hour thanks every one I will let you know what happens once I go to doctors or my health visitor. And we had spoke about the playstation and he said he has to he will sell it :) thank you all so much he hasn't yet but it's a starT x
Agree with CRSeaside.
You are really a single parent presently as your partner has checked out of the situation with this child. Basically he has checked out of the relationship.
You've talk with him and get nothing, he doesn't want to interact with the child, he games when he isn't working, etc.
Would he be willing to talk with a professional therapist? That would be the next step. If he refuses, then the relationship is pretty much going to get worse until you decide leave. I know you stated it's hard to just get up and leave, but in reality you are living as a single parent taking care of TWO children. At least he does work.
Are you financially depend on him?
You are really a single parent presently as your partner has checked out of the situation with this child. Basically he has checked out of the relationship.
You've talk with him and get nothing, he doesn't want to interact with the child, he games when he isn't working, etc.
Would he be willing to talk with a professional therapist? That would be the next step. If he refuses, then the relationship is pretty much going to get worse until you decide leave. I know you stated it's hard to just get up and leave, but in reality you are living as a single parent taking care of TWO children. At least he does work.
Are you financially depend on him?
COMMUNITY LEADER
I just want to say that my heart goes out to you sweetie. It sounds to be a bit of a shock that your son has downs and caring for a special needs baby is hard enough as it is. Then to have zero support from your significant other? I'm just so very sorry about that. You mourn things lost with a special needs child yourself, I'm sure. We're mothers, that is natural. But you, like a wonderful true mother, love your child. He's part of you and your responsibility to care for and love. The same can be said for your partner. This child stands not a chance if even his own father is rejecting of him. THIS is what you need to convey to him. Caring for this child, LOVING this child, bonding with this child is HIS duty. He owes your son this.
Tell him this bluntly. Not angrily, accusingly. He may fight it. But he needs to hear it. And then set forth a schedule. Yes, like he is a little boy. Act like a little boy, get treated like a little boy. I have sons. they don't get to play video games as they please either. So, you write up a schedule leaving him ONE hour of video time a day. Then have other things in slots that he has to do. Put in there a half hour of house clean up or 15 minutes of gathering dishes from other rooms and taking to the kitchen. Have in there his time to BOND (word it like that) with his child. Time to do another chore that he should help with. Time for the two of you and the baby to have dinner together. And one hour of blow off time for him to play video games. And the consequence of not doing it is that you are removing the video games from the home and gaming system. Don't be afraid to do this. It would already be gone if it were me.
He may have an issue with depression and that something to think about. Does he need to speak to a doctor?
But you have your hands full. be direct about what he needs to do to be a decent partner. I'm so glad you have your parents and they give you a break on Saturdays. And it sounds like if needed, you could go there to stay. But hopefully it won't come to that. Time for dad to be a dad and partner. good luck
Tell him this bluntly. Not angrily, accusingly. He may fight it. But he needs to hear it. And then set forth a schedule. Yes, like he is a little boy. Act like a little boy, get treated like a little boy. I have sons. they don't get to play video games as they please either. So, you write up a schedule leaving him ONE hour of video time a day. Then have other things in slots that he has to do. Put in there a half hour of house clean up or 15 minutes of gathering dishes from other rooms and taking to the kitchen. Have in there his time to BOND (word it like that) with his child. Time to do another chore that he should help with. Time for the two of you and the baby to have dinner together. And one hour of blow off time for him to play video games. And the consequence of not doing it is that you are removing the video games from the home and gaming system. Don't be afraid to do this. It would already be gone if it were me.
He may have an issue with depression and that something to think about. Does he need to speak to a doctor?
But you have your hands full. be direct about what he needs to do to be a decent partner. I'm so glad you have your parents and they give you a break on Saturdays. And it sounds like if needed, you could go there to stay. But hopefully it won't come to that. Time for dad to be a dad and partner. good luck
I know this may sound like a simplification, but IMO you need a third party involved. The pastor at your church. Or a marriage councilor.
I understand you do not want to separate. But ask yourself. What am I receiving from this relationship ? Is it enhancing my life? Am I willing to stand by and be ignored for the rest of my life?
You are a caring smart hard working person. Don't you deserve to be treated with love kindness and attention?
It can't all be up to you all of the time. Then this other person is just taking up space. Not adding to joy or helping with your son. Your son is his responsibility also. He must step up and be a man and learn to care for his child. Like you said, you don't need 2 children. Bless you. Maxy
I understand you do not want to separate. But ask yourself. What am I receiving from this relationship ? Is it enhancing my life? Am I willing to stand by and be ignored for the rest of my life?
You are a caring smart hard working person. Don't you deserve to be treated with love kindness and attention?
It can't all be up to you all of the time. Then this other person is just taking up space. Not adding to joy or helping with your son. Your son is his responsibility also. He must step up and be a man and learn to care for his child. Like you said, you don't need 2 children. Bless you. Maxy
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