Son's ex-girlfriend claims she is pregnant with his child. Need advice please!

[Pam 2006]

This is a tough one for me.
My son's ex girl friend claims she is pregnant with his child.  He says no way.  He said he wore 2 condoms and pulled out. When he mentioned that he will seek a paternity test she got nervous.

My son is in a wonderful relationship with a girl and now this is hanging over his head!

If he wore 2 condoms and pulled out before climaxing, how can she be pregnant?  She claims she is 6 months pregnant.

She is known to lie about things in the past.  She doesn't want child support she is just afraid that he will come after the child.  My son shows no interest in this girl or her baby because he knows it cannot be his.  But, what if it is.  I will have a grandchild out there and not know it?

Please give some advice!  Should he mention this to his girlfriend now or not tell her?

[kris123]

Fist, a thyroid problem can cause peorid problems.  I know because I have thyroid issue and have for many years.  She not be telling the truth or she could.  Some men get scared when they find out maybe they will be a father.  I have a BF and we planned a child and now he has changed his mind - just like that.  He claims maybe it is not his.  He is scared now and putting it all on me.  Make plans to take the test, try to have an open mind, and work through it.  I think the most important person in this is the baby and it's right to know who it's father is.

[Pam 2006]

Thank you!  I needed to hear that.  I feel better now that someone said what I wanted to.
Thanks again!!!

[pertykitty]

hippa protects the patient from outside forces. you cant contact the dr. i understand your feelings, but he is 24. he is a grown man, even when we dont want to see it haha. he admits to having sex, but who knows if the condom(s)broke or whatever happened. he needs to take care of this, not have you do it for him. you need to not get involved other than an ear. i know that sounds bad, but like i said he is a man now. and if by chance she is pg with his baby, its not the end of the world. he can be involved, he can pay child support, and he can still stay with his loving new girlfriend. when my sis started dating her hubby, it was a month into the relationship when he got the call. a friend that he had sex with was pg. it turned out to be his. it was hard, but they now share custody of this little girl. he pays a ton of child support, but you know, that is why you have to be responsible with sex.

[Trialanderror]

I would let her know that no paternity test = end of story. No more phone calls to any of you guys unless nothing but the facts are known. I am sure you have no time for mind games, neither does your son.

[Pam 2006]

Exactly what I am thinking!

Now you know my concerns!  I am trying not to make a big deal out of this.  If I was the parent to this girl don't you think I wouldn't be calling the fathers parents and finding out what he plans to do to help her.

And if it were me and I knew for a fact that he was the father, I would be trying to get all the financial help and support that I could.  

So, if the mother doesn't consent to a paternity test, then my son cannot get one?  I heard her say that she did not want any support and could not afford a paternity test.  My son said he would get one and pay for it.  she got off the phone really quick.

Now you know why this is all too confusing.

what would you do?
Thanks

[Trialanderror]

I was puzzled, too. Why would she inform him he is the father but does not want child support nor any of his involvement? It can only be a psychological thing to make him feel bad in his new relationship or to test his eagerness to get back with her. Would be good to get the facts via peternity test.