Would it ever workout

[Lostnthisworld]

Ive been dating this girl for about 3 1/2 years off and on...everything was perfect until I cheated on her and she lost my trust. Well I thought she forgiven me for my mistake but she didnt...she was cheating as well but wont admit to it...in 2010 I find out I was hiv positive and she always threw it in my face which it hurted me. Now she wants to be back with me but Idk cause she still like to talk to her exes....should I take her back?

[Lostnthisworld]

Thank you so much

[specialmom]

I think it is a difficult situation-------  you have a history that isn't all good.  

I am also aware that a diagnosis of HIV does pose problems in the area of finding someone to have a relationship with.  I don't say that to hurt you but as you know, it is an extra element to deal with.  You must disclose it from the start and you will find that some simply will choose to walk away.  That is a reality.  BUT . . . you deserve a loving relationship as anyone does and taking someone back that you feel isn't the best person for you wouldn't be a great choice.  

So, you must decide if you see a future with her or not, if you can overcome your past or not, if she can or not.  And make a decision based on that rather than lonliness or the idea of not finding someone.  

good luck

[Londres70]

Is it possible to see a private therapist plus attend the group sessions?  I can't imagine the array of feelings after being dealt this diagnosis.  Some groups offer a "buddy" system meaning you can call a member of the group when you really need to talk to someone about all this.  

In regards to taking your ex back.....hmmm.........in my opinion at this time you don't need the stress.  If you do end up back together, you both should seek couples' counseling as I have stated in my earlier post.  

[RainLover71]

Sorry for calling you bro,I thought you were a man.I guess my advice is still the same anyway.Think of your health before the relationship.

[Lostnthisworld]

I go to this meeting every month with people(girls) who have it and we talk but sometimes its not enough

[Londres70]

Will agree with kelsebby92.  The relationship just sounds to broken/unhealthy to continue.  

Unless.........

Would you all be willing to seek couseling to sort all this out?  That is the only way I believe this relationship could have a chance.  

Are you receiving counseling in regards to your diagnosis?  

[RainLover71]

This is your call bro and as you already know Hiv is a manageable disease now with improved medications and people are living close to normal lives with this illness.I wouldn't let that stop you from being in a loving relationship.If you believe you can trust her and that you won't cheat on her either then maybe give it a go.You obviously still care or you wouldn't be asking for opinions.All the best.

[kelsebby92]

Health shouldn't have anything to deal with that.. if somebody can't accept you for who you are and what is wrong with you then they shouldn't be apart of your life anyways. Don't just stay with someone because you think noone will love you because of your health. There are a lot of fish in the sea that will love you for you.

[Lostnthisworld]

Your right but idk how to stay away :( I feel like no one would ever date me or love me because of my health

[kelsebby92]

From my past expreince i would honestly have to say that sounds so unhealthy and I would either just try to stay friends with her until you can trust her or just completely stay away..