ex girlfriend

[danuza81]

i just lost my girlfriend about a month ago .we were living togther for 9 months.in that time i lost my man habits.lol. i couldnt go out with the fellas or do anything without running it by her. i didnt mind it at first because i loved her and u have to adapt to a diffrent lifestyle.after a few months i would lay in bed n think that this wasnt for me i would lie about going to work just so i could go out. i lied so much that i would lie to her for no reason.  so about a month ago my ex girl calls her and tells her my horrible past. all my dirty laundry had been dumped. and she tells her that me and her had messed around while i was with her .which we did mess around but me and my girl were on a break at the time. so she fluips out and kicks me out. packs all my stuff. so i was shocked and mad cause she didnt care to here me out. so now im thinking im free i dont have to deal with her controling ways and i can do what ever i want.but since we broke up i have put my life on hold for her. i stop whatever im doing just togo over whenever she feels like seeing me. i try so hard to just go over and see her. So i dont know why i feel like this . when i was having my doubts about her n me.is it cause she dumped me b4 i had a chance.or cause i feel i was ambush by my ex and it was bs the way she reacted? is it really worth getting her back?

[brice1967]

If she threw you out, she threw you out.  Dont bother going to see her if you have no interest in trying to save the relationship.  If you want to try to save the relationship.... you're either going to have to set some new ground rules or let her tug you around by the chain she'll put on you.  Oh yeah, quit lying.... the truth hurts, but the truth sets you free.

[LilDarlin09]

I completely agree with specialmom. You aren't ready for a real relationship. My boyfriend and I know exactly where the other one is and what they're doing and who their with. It's not that we control each other, but it's out of respect. But if I found out that he was lying to be about ANYTHING, even something little, I wouldn't trust him as much anymore. You can't lie in a relationship, unless you really don't care what happens. You just need your space, and to give her her space. She's going to need to get over the fact that you lied to her, and try to trust someone else eventually, which will be a lot harder now. I think you just need to get your act together before you start really dating again.

[specialmom]

I actually feel a little differently here.  I think you should leave her alone but for a different reason.  You made your own bed-----------  you blew it.  You can't have life both ways.  My husband doesn't just go out with his guy pals and party when he feels like it, right?  He's got a wife and kids and we talk about our schedule and what there is and isn't time for and if we have free time, what we really want to do with it.  If there is extra money, what we really want to do with it.  Etc.  You resented that aspect to a serious relationship which indicates you are not ready for one.  No matter how much you miss her, you are not ready to be with someone in a serious way yet.  Hopefully you will be someday.

I'm sorry you are hurting---------  but at this time you probably can't be the kind of boyfriend either she wants or you would like to be.  So date women casuelly.

And ex's that feel mistreated sometimes like to share---------- whether to warn someone else so they don't suffer the same fate or to make it clear to the person that hurt them that they didn't appreciate it.  It happens even though calling someone's significant other is immature.  

[cheshchesh819]

No cut your losses and run,the damage has been done,this relationship sounds doomed from the start,the rows the controlling and the ex which you got involved with again whilst you were on a break,i think you really need to be on your own for a while,go out and reaqante yourself with your mates and your life again.