Aa
is the affection my husband gives his 7 yr old daughter normal
I am married to a man who has a 7 year old we have had her since she was 3 full time I feel like he gives her affection he should give me he comes home from work and goes straight for her not even saying a word to me if i disciplined her he goes against me she knows that he will get mad at me and let her do what ever i feel her being almost 8 years old and saying she is just a baby is not normal he lets her get in the bed him in his underwear and spoons with her rubs her head and like tickles her back with the tips of his fingers the way he does me it maybe im jealous a bit but i have children and this is uncomfortable for me and weird he picks her up and puts her legs around him they kiss on the lips and she tells him to bite on her ear yes playing is fine like that when they are babies but almost 8 i know he is not doing anything sexual with her but last night he had her in our bed and i asked him to look at some pis online and he was laying on his belly in his underwear and she was runing the tips of her fingers all over his back and sides i will find him staring at her and them smiling at each other and blowing kisses yes its sweet but it goes on an on and our sex life has died because i am not feeling sexual and i don't know why please tell me im not crazy
After my mom and dad divorced and before he remarried, it was just us on weekends. I always slept in bed with dad, he'd give me kisses, hugs and hold me just because he felt like it. He still gives me kisses and hugs and I'm 26.
There was never anything sexual between us. He was my daddy and I was his pumpkin. I love my father dearly. He's my dad.
Perhaps he just really, truly loves his daughter and doesn't see anything wrong in showing her affection and being close to her. I know my dad felt horrible after the divorce and up until he remarried he showered me with affection and love. He was trying to make up for him and mom not being together.
I'm just as close to my mom. She still gives me kisses and when I'm feeling really bummed out she'll actually hold me. Some parents really are just super close to their kids. I'm really close to my boys. Granted they're only 3 right now, but I plan on hugging, kissing and cuddling with them until I become "uncool" and they think it's "gross". Why? Because they're my babies. They're mine and I love them more than anything in this entire world.
There was never anything sexual between us. He was my daddy and I was his pumpkin. I love my father dearly. He's my dad.
Perhaps he just really, truly loves his daughter and doesn't see anything wrong in showing her affection and being close to her. I know my dad felt horrible after the divorce and up until he remarried he showered me with affection and love. He was trying to make up for him and mom not being together.
I'm just as close to my mom. She still gives me kisses and when I'm feeling really bummed out she'll actually hold me. Some parents really are just super close to their kids. I'm really close to my boys. Granted they're only 3 right now, but I plan on hugging, kissing and cuddling with them until I become "uncool" and they think it's "gross". Why? Because they're my babies. They're mine and I love them more than anything in this entire world.
Will have to agree with Kayannaboo.
I would suggest talking this over with your husband and/or a counselor. There are a couple of issues going on here.
Bonjour!
I would suggest talking this over with your husband and/or a counselor. There are a couple of issues going on here.
Bonjour!
COMMUNITY LEADER
I think that you admit your jealousy is a big step. I think that is the point here and where the problem lies. He wants pictures of his child in his room and maybe even a lot of him . . . he LOVES her and that bothers you.
I think that you are having marital issues and are resentful of his love for his daughter. I would work on the marital issues and leave his kid out of it.
I also think that if you continue to pursue having more distance between him and his daughter, he'll leave you. I hate to say that------------ but he obviously loves her and a parent can only take so much negativity toward their relationship with their beloved child before they'll get fed up. I would be that way. I'd never stay with someone that didnt support my relationship with my child.
Maybe instead of approaching him about his relationship and interaction with her (or pics in your room)---------- you could approach him about the marriage. What can we do to be closer? How can we work to be the happiest couple we can be? Maybe some marriage counseling would help. I think you are putting it on his daughter when the problem is between the two of you.
Again, just my guessing from what you've written. BUT . . . no child should have to live with a jealous grown woman who resents her relationship with her custodial parent. That is unfair to this child. So, reel that in and work on your marriage. good luck
I think that you are having marital issues and are resentful of his love for his daughter. I would work on the marital issues and leave his kid out of it.
I also think that if you continue to pursue having more distance between him and his daughter, he'll leave you. I hate to say that------------ but he obviously loves her and a parent can only take so much negativity toward their relationship with their beloved child before they'll get fed up. I would be that way. I'd never stay with someone that didnt support my relationship with my child.
Maybe instead of approaching him about his relationship and interaction with her (or pics in your room)---------- you could approach him about the marriage. What can we do to be closer? How can we work to be the happiest couple we can be? Maybe some marriage counseling would help. I think you are putting it on his daughter when the problem is between the two of you.
Again, just my guessing from what you've written. BUT . . . no child should have to live with a jealous grown woman who resents her relationship with her custodial parent. That is unfair to this child. So, reel that in and work on your marriage. good luck
Oh brother.... I don't even know what to say. I've got 2 boys (I am their father) who I love more than anything in this world, other than my wife. These guys are 17 and 14 respectfully, and when they were little fellers I used to kiss them on the lips... but now? No dice! They'd probably want to kick my hind end if I even tried.
Momma on the other hand, neither boy has a problem kissing their mother, and I don't have a problem with that either. I think there is a special bond that boys have with their mother, and it is probably the same with daughters and their fathers. If either one of my boys gets the smallest cold, by looking at my wife, you'd think they just had an organ transplant. (In fact, she doesn't like anyone in the house sick and would take any illness that rolled through the house from any of us if possible...because she is a mother.) Yeah, it is over the top perhaps, but that is her style and my boys know without a doubt that their mother loves them, all times.
I'd like to offer this as a bit of insight. Perhaps the amount of "over affection" your husband shows his daughter is because of the divorce with him and her mother. Maybe he is trying to prove to her that he is her father, and trying to be her mother too and putting a lot of love out there. I personally don't see anything wrong with that.... the spooning might be a bit much, but .....
This might just be his style. I grew up with a kid whose father showed no emotion at all, until the day my buddy shot his first deer. His dad couldn't have been more proud. The other time I saw my buddy's dad even close to showing any emotion was when my buddy graduated high school.... other times, emotions were shut off. That does not mean his dad didn't love him, quite the contrary. That was just his style. I also had a friend whose mother made a giant deal out of everything my buddy did. "Oh wow Gerry! YOu took the trash out. I am so proud of you. You always make me proud..." The kid was 17.... he took the friggin trash out, not cured cancer. Settle down ma'am. It is parenting styles.... personally, I think time outs are a joke, especially when they last a minute and the kid is like 10.....
This is a problem that you and he need to sort out. I think you need to take the daughter out of the equation as she is only 7-8 and is a kid. She needs the support of her father and you for that matter, but perhaps there can be some kind of a compromise. Talk it out with your husband, and don't pull punches. Let him see the feeling and emotions.... I don't know, even that might scare him off....
Momma on the other hand, neither boy has a problem kissing their mother, and I don't have a problem with that either. I think there is a special bond that boys have with their mother, and it is probably the same with daughters and their fathers. If either one of my boys gets the smallest cold, by looking at my wife, you'd think they just had an organ transplant. (In fact, she doesn't like anyone in the house sick and would take any illness that rolled through the house from any of us if possible...because she is a mother.) Yeah, it is over the top perhaps, but that is her style and my boys know without a doubt that their mother loves them, all times.
I'd like to offer this as a bit of insight. Perhaps the amount of "over affection" your husband shows his daughter is because of the divorce with him and her mother. Maybe he is trying to prove to her that he is her father, and trying to be her mother too and putting a lot of love out there. I personally don't see anything wrong with that.... the spooning might be a bit much, but .....
This might just be his style. I grew up with a kid whose father showed no emotion at all, until the day my buddy shot his first deer. His dad couldn't have been more proud. The other time I saw my buddy's dad even close to showing any emotion was when my buddy graduated high school.... other times, emotions were shut off. That does not mean his dad didn't love him, quite the contrary. That was just his style. I also had a friend whose mother made a giant deal out of everything my buddy did. "Oh wow Gerry! YOu took the trash out. I am so proud of you. You always make me proud..." The kid was 17.... he took the friggin trash out, not cured cancer. Settle down ma'am. It is parenting styles.... personally, I think time outs are a joke, especially when they last a minute and the kid is like 10.....
This is a problem that you and he need to sort out. I think you need to take the daughter out of the equation as she is only 7-8 and is a kid. She needs the support of her father and you for that matter, but perhaps there can be some kind of a compromise. Talk it out with your husband, and don't pull punches. Let him see the feeling and emotions.... I don't know, even that might scare him off....
Thank you for your thoughts I love he loves his daughter I know the different ways people show affection I ama daddys girl I also have 3 girls and 2 boys I know that I have never seen things like this I just feel as though certain things should be sacrid between husband and wife like our our bedroom. He had a picture of her above his head of our bed on a stuffed animal I have him he got very up set when I moved it also had 4 other pics in out room I told him out room it is our space and a family photo would be fine but those made me uneasy I am jealous some I know this but I used to not be I feel like my feelings don't matter I do express my feelings and his defense goes crazy help I love my husband and my step daughter
Thank you for your thoughts I love he loves his daughter I know the different ways people show affection I ama daddys girl I also have 3 girls and 2 boys I know that I have never seen things like this I just feel as though certain things should be sacrid between husband and wife like our
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