Confused!

[Babyface78]

So I have been dating a great woman for about two months. It seems some days she is all into us and other days not so much. She tells me she loves me a lot and that she really enjoys how I respect her. I'm busy during the week with college so on the weekends I spend it with her. I put all my effort into us, telling her how beautiful she is how great she is. I'm the type of person that likes to comment her, not so much from her though. I live with my cousins, reason why in school but I also work I'm not that broke guy. I take her out to dinner leave nice little notes for her to find. But then there are those days that she says I think you should go home have a nice night we will talk soon. Sex I know it's not everything but it's a rare thing. What's going on?

[Babyface78]

Sorry about spelling on that last post trying to do homewrok.  Why did i decide to go back to school again?

[Babyface78]

so we just talked about if i was there enough for her.  She said that she didn't see a problem really, i told her how i felt she has been steping back and again she said that she did not reliaze she was doing that.  All in all i told her how I felt and what she was thinking and i'm going to continue to support her in every way possible but i"m not going to push her, i don't think I was pushing her but maybe I was.  I think we will get through this, thanks everyone. Always read a bunch if things in here but never got involved, its seeing other people views on this. Thanks again.

[TTinKKerBBell]

It sounds like You are Looking, Hoping, Expecting more than She can give right now.  I believe there is SomeOne for EveryOne, but!! We need to give it TIME to know WHO is right for Us.   MAYBE, She will be it - but maybe -just MAYBE....She won't.  If You are willing to invest the time.....well, that's fine and good.  But don't pressure Her -  believe me, You don't want Her to be insecure or unsure about a possible "new" relationship when She is on the "rebound".
I truely feel You are not giving Her enough time.  Time to work through Her pain, discomfort, issues, etc.
AND
DO YOU WANT HER BEFORE SHE HAS DONE THAT????  Or do You want Her after She has assessed what this previous relationship meant or didn't mean?  Speaking for myself - I would want someone who had sorted through the issues and come to realize what is important, meaningful, in the NEXT relationship.

Give Her The Time She Needs To Make A Better Choice!!
or do You want Her NOW before She knows what She wants????

[Babyface78]

I'm not the one who said I love you ,she did.  She talks about the future all the time then steps back, stating I love you.  Other problems I have been noticing is she still talks with her ex in a tex message,saying life is to short to turn my back, like really.  Spends more time playing with her gadgets then with me when I'm there.Its like I'm just filling a hole for untill she finds someone better.  I think its time to cut her lose before I get wrecked in all this.  She is going through some odd times for sure, new job always being sick in the last few weeks, sinus infections.  I'm there trying to listen to her about all her feelings, she talked me about her ex on more than one occasion and thanks me for listening.  I can listen all day long but I also have feelings and it hurts hearing about other guys.  She told me its over with her ex and will never be with him again but I hear to much about him. I asked her today if I give her enough emotional support and she has just avoided the question all around.  First few weeks were amazing emotional wise and physical part mind blowing now nothing.

[specialmom]

I personally always worry about people who want to skip the steps of letting love mature.  It often leads to a relationship with no foundation to make it last.  Something to think about for this relationship and in the future.  good luck

[Nighthawk61]

I'm appreciating what TTink has brought up about expecting too much too fast. It's true, that it's only been a short time you've been together to expect too much more than what's she's giving you now. Love does take time to grow. Good call TTink, (as always). Maybe it's too early to give up on this?

[TTinKKerBBell]

My take on this

It's only been 2 months - It isn't "love" in ONLY 2 months.  It's interest, infatuation, attraction, etc., in ONLY 2 months.  It takes more than 2 months to "know" if this is the "right" someone.  Love grows and develops with time. Maybe She's more "realistic" about this than You.  Two months is ONLY 4 weeks,  ONLY 60 days.  Maybe She feels "rushed" by You.  I think You should give it more time to grow and develop.
Good Luck,

[Babyface78]

It's just hard to let go, I really like her but what the he'll. I seem to always find woman who are not use to being treated good. She has told me many times, your to go to me. I don't think woman should be treated bad, but I always find the ones who won't return the kindness. She calls me the, hopeless romantic, so what woman should be treated good in my eyes.

[AnnieBrooke]

I agree with Nighthawk, don't be where you're not wanted.  She is probably not playing a game as much as she is reflecting to you her real feelings, which are not hot and passionate but calm and rather cool.  Maybe she thinks she can find someone better, maybe your affectionate notes and all make her think she doesn't have to try hard with you and she is possibly one of those people who is more interested if they are a little on the edge.  

Sounds like you can do better, or at least, you should not let your love be drained by her lack of enthusiasm.  Find someone who thinks you're a catch.

[Nighthawk61]

Also, I just noticed that you are 34. It's time for you to find a committed individual right? I had a long distance relationship and nothing could have dragged us away from each other for one minute during the time we could be together. Have you talked about what your expectations are? Are you looking to get married, before too long, and have a family? What do YOU want in a relationship right now and in the future, and how does this girl measure up to that?

[Nighthawk61]

I think it's great that your friend acknowledges that you respect her, but what about the other way around? It sounds to me like maybe this relationship is a little bit one sided, and you may be the one that loses here. If it were me, knowing what I know at my age, I would say keep it cool, don't be where you're not wanted and look around for somebody who respects you and your feelings. Sounds like you're a good catch, so......look for a good catch. They have to be into you as much as you're into them. Good luck finding the right girl that reciprocates your commitment and makes you feel special too. You sound like a real catch to me. Keep up the good work at school.