marrying my aunt's daughter....

Question

Hi, 

   I'm hari from India. I love my aunt's daughter. But my aunt didn't accept our love and she divert her daughter's mind by telling like future child problems. Because she also married her aunt's son. now my aunt's 2nd daughter suffered from Stroke. some of the doctors told that due to marryng in relation, these kind of problem occured. But my aunt is my dad's cousin(ie his cousin's daughter). if i marry my aunt's daughter, our future child will be suffer by any kind of disease.......

nursegirl6572 · Answer

Actually, you've addressed a member in your response who isn't even active on this site anymore.  Judy hasn't posted in 2 years, and the OP hasn't posted since 2009.  

It looks as though you've revived this old post, simply to post a rebuttal to Judy's post, and she's not even around anymore.

There are TONS of current posts on this site that need answered, with people waiting for a reply that I'm sure would be grateful to have their post(s) answered.

wyrpamatz · Answer

I know this post is kind of old but if you guys think about mostly everyone on here is saying that its gross to be in love with your cousin but in the Indian culture it has happened that your parents arrange to marry your cousin. maybe this is not an arranged marriage but it does happen you guys have to think outside the box and look at the Indian culture as well. Me myself am nit okay with this but it does happen and they both know that their kids much the defects but they are both risking it.

Marcous · Answer

I know but still there are people want to get answer for this case :)

specialmom · Answer

This post is over TWO years old.

Marcous · Answer

Judy, he said that  he and his cousin in love , and he didn't say he wants to marry her just because she is his cousin ... plus she is his cousin and not his sister and that is allowable ... so when you say that you can't marry your cousin because you see it gross that's is your opinion ..so don't talk about freedom in the USA  when you want to impose your opinion on others ... and don't forget the bio labs so they can know if the children will have problems or not.

stoof · Answer

You should take a look at the following article which is based on science...not the ignorant, hatred spewed by so many who have replied to your question.

http://dailyuw.com/2002/4/9/kissing-cousins-can-have-fine-offspring/

Judy246 · Answer

It's in the culture, where marriages are arranged and young girls are brain washed to accept what they have no power over. Very sad situation. I thank God, I'm in the United States of America, land of the free and women have the freedom of choice and not accept what is morally unexceptable and just wrong.

megochick101 · Answer

Well said Judy, I was about to say the same thing about her not being a very strong woman! I love my husband to death but I know i could live without him. I think that's part of truly loving someone, knowing that you do not need your spouse and that you could live without them, but choosing to be with them, that's true love imo. 

She seems to be very needy and she needs to meet other men who are not in her own family and you need to go out and meet other woman who are not in your family. It's not healthy for future children, and there are BILLIONS of other people out there for both of you!

Judy246 · Answer

Then she is not your aunt, but a distant cousin, still bloodline. If you belong to the same bloodline it's wrong for the sake of future children being born with the same DNA and putting them at risk for diseases. Also, family should never be intimate with each other, it's out of the norm. You stated that without you she can't live, then she is mentally and emotionally a weak woman, because a woman does not need a man or "love" to live or simply survive on a daily base, but you are in India and the culture is very different. She can "exist" quite well and freely on her own.  In the United States, most women are strong minded and very independent and would never marry a family member, although it has happened and will happened, but it  goes against what is considered normal.

heatherlynn22 · Answer

you are related YES it can cause your children to be born with some sort of birth defect. plus it's disgusting. she is your COUSIN. your aunts daughter. that is just completely and utterly GROSS!

hariharan_22 · Answer

Thank u Heatherlynn.
     my aunt is not born wth my dad. she is my dad's cousin daughter. My love and me were belongs to the same blood group (A1 +ve). Without me she can't live. me too in that stage.i want to marry her only, still it would cause any disease for our child.

megochick101 · Answer

Yes your future children can have a lot of different birth defects and other problems if you marry within the same bloodline. I would suggest like everyone else trying to find someone who is not part of your family to be with.

jo929 · Answer

I really do no think that it would be a good idea to marry a blood cousin   luck  jo

msniki412 · Answer

That would be like me marrying my almost 17 year old cousin (we are first cousins) and to me thats super gross. I suggest you take the advice of all on here and marry someone who is not part of your family. Not only would it cause heartache in your family, but future kids could have horrible birth defects. Like all said, birth defects can happen at any time with any two people but the risks are higher when you marry a family member.

Judy246 · Answer

Listen to teko...there you can pick and choose from thousand of women that are not family. Literally...thousands.

teko · Answer

Is there a shortage of women over there? I think ya need to concentrate on some other than those you are related to? Problem solved.

iam1butterfly · Answer

My grandparents (my mother's mom & dad) were cousins. 
Of their 7 daughters, including my mom, 3 turned out fairly "normal" and, the other 4? 
... well, let's just say that... mentally, they turned out to be very strange individuals.

heatherlynn22 · Answer

you want to marry your cousin? oh so gross!!! but yeah since the 2 of you share a blood line than the children have a higher risk of having a birth defect than unrelated parents. it's not impossible for unrelated parents to have children with birth defects it's just that since you and your cousin share dna (mothers are sisters or father are brothers...etc etc) than you have a higher risk of having children with something wrong with them?

BearHitch · Answer

I am not sure what your question is, but yes if you were to have children with your cousin your children could potentially suffer from birth defects.  Of course, this can happen if you marry someone you have no relation to whatsoever - both of my children will have born with birth defects and I am not related to my husband.  Not that I am an advocate of marrying your cousin, mind you, but if that is what your question was there is an answer.

Judy246 · Answer

I'm sorry, one more comment: I believe that you and your cousin share the same DNA and blood, which can result in a diffective child. My questions to you is, being aware that both your matching DNA can result in your childs future health, prone to disease and deformities, are you willing to rish puting your future in such a situation and when that child grows, having to explain your decision of marrying a first cousin.  Good luck in your decision and please think very carefully of future consequences.

Judy246 · Answer

Your aunt's daughter is your cousin (family and bloodline). I don't know if this is appropriate in India, but in the United States it is not, but it is also permitted with great protest from the families. I am aware of marriages between first cousins within my family friends and they have had beutiful, normal children, but that is not always the case.

I personally find it unexceptable for first cousins to marry. That would be like my niece and nephew and all hell would break lose in my family if that were to ever occur.

Love is blind and all is fair in love, but there is something about first cousins getting married that to me is like a sin, immoral, inappropriate and something unspoken of or if they marry will be used as an example of what never to do....it goes again the norm.