Aa
I cant find it
Ive recently decided to have sexual inter course with my girlfriend but when i came to do it I couldn't find the hole but after a long time in trying I found it but couldn't get my penis to go in, it started to hurt so we had to stop, I feel really embarrassed and also this is my first time having sex.
No need to feel embarassed, that's normal, we all have really awkward first times! She's probably just as embarassed as you, no need to worry! Just keep trying, relax and have fun together, it'll get easier.
Here's a few good tips:
Invest in some good personal lubricant. I prefer the water based ones myself. For a woman, lots of lube feels a lot better than irritating friction during penetration. The lube will help you slide it in a lot easier. Sometimes just shoving it in is less painful than doing it a little at a time but it really depends on the person, but if you think of it like ripping tape off your skin, ripping it off all at once is usually better than doing it slowly.
My vagina is always tight at first whenever I have sex so there is always some pain at first and I prefer shoving it in as fast as possible to get that intial pain done and over with. While he is inside me I tell him to not move while I let my vaginal muscles adjust to it and it feels really good.
Get her to masturbate. Ask her to explore her body through masturbation before sex (unless losing her virginity to you right away is important to her, masturbating by herself might make her much more comfortable with her sexuality and her body and will give her the time and experience to get to know her body without the pressure of having to please you at the same time) - without you being there, and you should also do the same thing too.
You will not be able to please her until she knows what pleases her. All men who wish to please women should be asking their women what pleases them instead of just assuming. The best thing a woman can do is masturbate and learn all the ways that she can orgasm, otherwise just relying on her man to do it for her is not going to work.
Women can orgasm in MANY ways, they just have to figure it out through masturbation.
Take her out to a sex shop and buy her a dildo. Tell her I advised her to get a realistic skin dildo because it can teach her how to orgasm with penetration.
Next time you have sex, drink a little bit of wine with each other (I'm not sure what the drinking age is where you are) to ease any nervousness and get real romantic and passionate.
If she is virgin it'll hurt at first but that's normal.
Get her really turned on. Find out what turns her on. The more turned on she is, the more wet and stretched out her vagina will be and the less it will hurt her when you penetrate. Experiment with different positions and different kinky things.
Play with her clitoris during, it will make her orgasm and will also make penetration feel better for her.
Here's a few good tips:
Invest in some good personal lubricant. I prefer the water based ones myself. For a woman, lots of lube feels a lot better than irritating friction during penetration. The lube will help you slide it in a lot easier. Sometimes just shoving it in is less painful than doing it a little at a time but it really depends on the person, but if you think of it like ripping tape off your skin, ripping it off all at once is usually better than doing it slowly.
My vagina is always tight at first whenever I have sex so there is always some pain at first and I prefer shoving it in as fast as possible to get that intial pain done and over with. While he is inside me I tell him to not move while I let my vaginal muscles adjust to it and it feels really good.
Get her to masturbate. Ask her to explore her body through masturbation before sex (unless losing her virginity to you right away is important to her, masturbating by herself might make her much more comfortable with her sexuality and her body and will give her the time and experience to get to know her body without the pressure of having to please you at the same time) - without you being there, and you should also do the same thing too.
You will not be able to please her until she knows what pleases her. All men who wish to please women should be asking their women what pleases them instead of just assuming. The best thing a woman can do is masturbate and learn all the ways that she can orgasm, otherwise just relying on her man to do it for her is not going to work.
Women can orgasm in MANY ways, they just have to figure it out through masturbation.
Take her out to a sex shop and buy her a dildo. Tell her I advised her to get a realistic skin dildo because it can teach her how to orgasm with penetration.
Next time you have sex, drink a little bit of wine with each other (I'm not sure what the drinking age is where you are) to ease any nervousness and get real romantic and passionate.
If she is virgin it'll hurt at first but that's normal.
Get her really turned on. Find out what turns her on. The more turned on she is, the more wet and stretched out her vagina will be and the less it will hurt her when you penetrate. Experiment with different positions and different kinky things.
Play with her clitoris during, it will make her orgasm and will also make penetration feel better for her.
Thank you both, i may have worded that wrong, sorry annie and yeas i am quite young to be honest, im 17 almost 18 now and ive been with my girlfriend for 3 years now we talk and laugh about everything so i know shes the right person to have sex with. Yes she hasn't had sex either. But I haven't rushed it as i have waited 3 years for this where as my friends do rush it.
You looks very young .
Briefly , concentrate on your relationship itself , then everything will be ok.
Don't rush for sex . give a chance for you and for her to build a consistent relationship.
Agree with Mrs. Annie .
Briefly , concentrate on your relationship itself , then everything will be ok.
Don't rush for sex . give a chance for you and for her to build a consistent relationship.
Agree with Mrs. Annie .
I assume it was also her first time in having sex too? It actually sounds like a lot of people's first sexual encounters, particularly if neither person has had experience. It's not like the movies (and thank heavens for that, porn is one of the worst things to look at if you are trying to get a realistic idea of what sex is. It's designed to look dramatic on camera, not to be a model of what to do.)
Anyway, I don't know how old you are, but you sound rather young. Sometimes waiting can help -- it will help you learn better communications and more self-certainty, so if you do get yourself into a mess it will be one that the two of you can laugh about and shrug off and keep at it and get right. Sex begins in the communications, not in the bedroom. If you can't communicate and laugh and be relaxed together in all circumstances, this might not be the right person to have sex with. At the least, the relationship is not going to be enhanced by the self-consciousness of early sexual encounters.
I am also troubled by you saying "I've recently decided to have sexual intercourse with my girlfriend," as though she did not make a decision about it, and then it sounds like you felt like it was all on you. ("I couldn't find the hole but after a long time I found it," is not the picture of a lively, two-way sexual encounter, but more like a nervous and panicky quest by you all by yourself. What was she doing all this time, just lying there looking at you?) I would really work on just being yourselves together and seeing how much you even like each other, before being sexually intimate.
There are books written for people about sex and sexual technique, doubtless many websites too. Steer away from the ones with a porno bent, and instead find the ones that are written for educational purposes (in the 1970s there were a lot of books written on human sexuality, they're probably still around). You should learn the erogenous zones of your body and hers, and see if you can learn some methods and techniques together. (That is, if she is really up for this.)
Finally, be absolutely sure she is on reliable birth control that will not fail, such as an IUD or the Pill, as well as you should always wear a condom. The very last thing you would want is to unilaterally decide it was time to have some sex, and to become a father.
Anyway, I don't know how old you are, but you sound rather young. Sometimes waiting can help -- it will help you learn better communications and more self-certainty, so if you do get yourself into a mess it will be one that the two of you can laugh about and shrug off and keep at it and get right. Sex begins in the communications, not in the bedroom. If you can't communicate and laugh and be relaxed together in all circumstances, this might not be the right person to have sex with. At the least, the relationship is not going to be enhanced by the self-consciousness of early sexual encounters.
I am also troubled by you saying "I've recently decided to have sexual intercourse with my girlfriend," as though she did not make a decision about it, and then it sounds like you felt like it was all on you. ("I couldn't find the hole but after a long time I found it," is not the picture of a lively, two-way sexual encounter, but more like a nervous and panicky quest by you all by yourself. What was she doing all this time, just lying there looking at you?) I would really work on just being yourselves together and seeing how much you even like each other, before being sexually intimate.
There are books written for people about sex and sexual technique, doubtless many websites too. Steer away from the ones with a porno bent, and instead find the ones that are written for educational purposes (in the 1970s there were a lot of books written on human sexuality, they're probably still around). You should learn the erogenous zones of your body and hers, and see if you can learn some methods and techniques together. (That is, if she is really up for this.)
Finally, be absolutely sure she is on reliable birth control that will not fail, such as an IUD or the Pill, as well as you should always wear a condom. The very last thing you would want is to unilaterally decide it was time to have some sex, and to become a father.
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