Aa
Oh my God, what now????
Sally and I took my son to his diabetes doc this morning and then we went out to lunch. I noticed at lunch, she started to have those symptoms....hands shaking a little and slowing down and rubbing her face....all those symptoms she would have on the soma and I thought that I am just crazy or parinoid. Then she started driving funny taking me to work and by the time we got to my work and I looked into her eyes, I could see it. So I said something to her and she got out of the car.
When I looked right into her eyes, face to face, (still feeling a little crazy), I said she lookes like when she used to take the soma and her face just dropped. I asked her if she took some and she said yes and that she was going to talk to me about it last night but I was too tired, so she figured she would talk to me about it today. I asked her if she picked up an rx and she said yes.
So we are standing in the parking lot of my work and I am looking at her and feeling like all we just went through meant nothing. She even told me the other night after reading more from this site and more that I wrote that she never wants to take soma again and that it is poison and she cannot take it. I reminded her of it and told her to flush it, that I am not going to change my mind. She said she wants me to hold it so she can take it prn. Bullshyt!!!!!!!!! I am totally in shock and have no idea where to go. I told her if she gave them to me to hold, I will flush them down the toilet and the last thing I told her was she needs to flush them.
Oh you guys....help me. I am so sad and hurt and disappointed. I feel betrayed. I need advise.
Please, I need you. This is totally unfamiliar territory for me.
Love,
Debbie
When I looked right into her eyes, face to face, (still feeling a little crazy), I said she lookes like when she used to take the soma and her face just dropped. I asked her if she took some and she said yes and that she was going to talk to me about it last night but I was too tired, so she figured she would talk to me about it today. I asked her if she picked up an rx and she said yes.
So we are standing in the parking lot of my work and I am looking at her and feeling like all we just went through meant nothing. She even told me the other night after reading more from this site and more that I wrote that she never wants to take soma again and that it is poison and she cannot take it. I reminded her of it and told her to flush it, that I am not going to change my mind. She said she wants me to hold it so she can take it prn. Bullshyt!!!!!!!!! I am totally in shock and have no idea where to go. I told her if she gave them to me to hold, I will flush them down the toilet and the last thing I told her was she needs to flush them.
Oh you guys....help me. I am so sad and hurt and disappointed. I feel betrayed. I need advise.
Please, I need you. This is totally unfamiliar territory for me.
Love,
Debbie
I will take this all in and get back to you tomorrow. Please....I am going to talk to her when I get home and will see what comes of it. I have to give her a chance to make this right. She just picked them up last night and she only took 3 today. I will tell her I want them flushed and see what happens. I am sticking to my guns on this.
Wish me luck. I'll let you know.
Love you and appreciate you all!!!!
Debs
Wish me luck. I'll let you know.
Love you and appreciate you all!!!!
Debs
Everything Cathy said, i agree with! I know it's hard to hear, but sadly it is the truth! Take those words and do what you can for the love of your life, do it before it is too late! You and Sal deserve to live a long and healthy life together. This is what i told my hubby, i said " I want to grow old with you, and sit on the front porch on our rockers when we are 80". I had to make the choice to quit, so i can do that. Don't get me wrong, damm...I would kill for just one more pill! I miss that feeling, but would rather live to see my son grow up and be able to sit on that front porch when i am 80 with my hubby on those rockers...Ok, actually just want to chase him around with my cane, and smack him a few times, and watch his teeth fall out! I am soooooooooooooooooooo looking forward to those days. LOL...
Like Cathy said, if it sounds to good to be true, then it prob. is! Maybe look around for some in patient rehabs, i know it sucks sending our loved ones away, but dang girl, just think when she comes home she will be CLEAN and HEALTHY. I think that is the best, and only way that she will ever overcome this addiction. Sorry, know you don't want to have to go that route, but it is for the best. She needs inside help now, they are professionals and will care for her, she will be in good hands. The best part is, is that you won't have to see her suffer while detoxing. You can look forward to her homecoming and work on the rest of your lives together. Please, look into this (for her sake). You will be so glad you did when it is all over.
Wuvs you girl,
Hopey
Like Cathy said, if it sounds to good to be true, then it prob. is! Maybe look around for some in patient rehabs, i know it sucks sending our loved ones away, but dang girl, just think when she comes home she will be CLEAN and HEALTHY. I think that is the best, and only way that she will ever overcome this addiction. Sorry, know you don't want to have to go that route, but it is for the best. She needs inside help now, they are professionals and will care for her, she will be in good hands. The best part is, is that you won't have to see her suffer while detoxing. You can look forward to her homecoming and work on the rest of your lives together. Please, look into this (for her sake). You will be so glad you did when it is all over.
Wuvs you girl,
Hopey
Thanks for being you!!! I wont be mad at you for telling me how it is. No worries. I really appreciate your support and your honesty. I know and hear where you are coming from, but in my experience over a year and a half with this woman, she always comes to me and tells me the truth and I have faith that she will continue even though it is scary and she does have to continually have to KEEP my trust...well, if I am nuts then oh well. You know I love this woman, Cat, and I cant help but to keep believing in her. I have said it before and I will say it again, she is totally worth it and besides this issue, I have the most amazing relationship that is more wonderful than I could ever imagined.
Keep me in your prayers though because I do and will need to be strong.
I'll be as tough as I can!!!!! Of course, with love.
Deb
Keep me in your prayers though because I do and will need to be strong.
I'll be as tough as I can!!!!! Of course, with love.
Deb
I've been keeping up a little bit, theres always so much to read, but last week when i heard she was cleaning up, it sounded to me like the story wasn't over. And I'm so sorry your on the shyt end of this.. We addicts are also on the shyt end but it is by choice. If it sounds to good to be true, than
it probably is. From now on , this will be hard for you cause of the type of woman you are, soft ,loving and beleiving. I suggest you act as if everything she tells you pertaining to her addiction, is a flat out lie. and put up a wall to protect from being hurt. It may distance and disturb your relationship, but is allready is disturbed by sal's soma usage. Sorry Sal, I'm playing the devils advocate. Sal, you need to prove yourself to deb and earn any trust you get. Deb if you continue to believe everything she tells you, (I love ya girlfriend and in all due respect) your nuts. She's got to earn your trust. And right now you have nothing to go on. I'm sorry to be harsh, but thats how I see it. Don't be mad at me I don't pussyfoot around it. She's no different than any other addict. And she's telling you what you want to hear..Sorry Sal, don't mean to blow your cover sweetheart. We've all made promices with good intenions. Deb's a good woman. Hit up a womans meeting. You can do it. It won't be a picnic, but theres a more intimate support being in person with other addicts.
Deb, toughen up. Cathy
it probably is. From now on , this will be hard for you cause of the type of woman you are, soft ,loving and beleiving. I suggest you act as if everything she tells you pertaining to her addiction, is a flat out lie. and put up a wall to protect from being hurt. It may distance and disturb your relationship, but is allready is disturbed by sal's soma usage. Sorry Sal, I'm playing the devils advocate. Sal, you need to prove yourself to deb and earn any trust you get. Deb if you continue to believe everything she tells you, (I love ya girlfriend and in all due respect) your nuts. She's got to earn your trust. And right now you have nothing to go on. I'm sorry to be harsh, but thats how I see it. Don't be mad at me I don't pussyfoot around it. She's no different than any other addict. And she's telling you what you want to hear..Sorry Sal, don't mean to blow your cover sweetheart. We've all made promices with good intenions. Deb's a good woman. Hit up a womans meeting. You can do it. It won't be a picnic, but theres a more intimate support being in person with other addicts.
Deb, toughen up. Cathy
Sorry, don't mean to make you cry...Lol
When my sister came on here that day, and told you all of what happend to me, sometimes she can over exagurate. Yes i was very very sick, and am lucky to be alive, but she made it sound like i was dying...I just wanted to clear that up with you and everyone else. She takes things to extreme sometimes. Ok, now that i got that out of the way, Thank you for keeping my family in your prayers.
My dad and me had a very long talk yesterday, a heart to heart...i was crying he had tears in his eyes, but it meant alot. The time is coming, and he knows it. He told me he can feel it and they say when that happens it isn't much longer. My mom is hanging in there everyday. She goes to work everyday, and tries to keep busy. She is a WONDERFUL mom, and i love her to death.
I hope Sally will beat this thing, i know she can do it! Just keep working with her, tough love baby all the way!!!
I mean it when i say, if you ever need anything, please just ask me! I will always be here for you for anything you ever need.
You are the most kind person and have the biggest heart out of anyone i have ever known.
Luv u,
Hopey
When my sister came on here that day, and told you all of what happend to me, sometimes she can over exagurate. Yes i was very very sick, and am lucky to be alive, but she made it sound like i was dying...I just wanted to clear that up with you and everyone else. She takes things to extreme sometimes. Ok, now that i got that out of the way, Thank you for keeping my family in your prayers.
My dad and me had a very long talk yesterday, a heart to heart...i was crying he had tears in his eyes, but it meant alot. The time is coming, and he knows it. He told me he can feel it and they say when that happens it isn't much longer. My mom is hanging in there everyday. She goes to work everyday, and tries to keep busy. She is a WONDERFUL mom, and i love her to death.
I hope Sally will beat this thing, i know she can do it! Just keep working with her, tough love baby all the way!!!
I mean it when i say, if you ever need anything, please just ask me! I will always be here for you for anything you ever need.
You are the most kind person and have the biggest heart out of anyone i have ever known.
Luv u,
Hopey
Thank you for being straight and tough with me. I need it. I know it is because of where you have come from. Everytime you post, you make me cry. Your words are so true and full of passion. You are an amazing person and I so admire you. I don't want to live without her in my life so I will be tough and when she gets mad I will tell her to read your words. Thanks for your support, so much. I will never be able to express how much of a difference your testimony has made in my life. Remember, I first started on here when you went into the hospital and your sister was telling us that they didn't know if you were going to make it out alive. So words cannot express how blessed I feel that you are here, that you are so passionate and that you are in my life.
Sorry about your cousin. I will keep you and her family in my prayers. I cannot imagine that kind of loss at that age.
You know i luvs you to!!!!
I am here for you too, girl. How is dad and mom???
love,
Debs
Sorry about your cousin. I will keep you and her family in my prayers. I cannot imagine that kind of loss at that age.
You know i luvs you to!!!!
I am here for you too, girl. How is dad and mom???
love,
Debs
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