Aa
vicoden question
My wife was addicted to Vicoden more than a year ago. I have more than just afeeling she's back on them again.
She has a deteriorating vertebre in and was in recently to see a specialist. I know the pain is real,
but I fear when she went in to genuinely check it out, she was offered a script and didn't turn it down.
During her addiction I discovered she was getting prescriptions from several doctors and using an on-line drug seller from Canada to get more. She fessed up to me afer I confronted and even informed the doctors involved so she couldn't shop them again. Her cell phone has been ringing lateley when I'm with her and she;s admitted that "its those people I hate" calling again. While she shrugs it off, and likely feels like that admission is close to the truth, I think she's using them again.
I need to know what these things look like or if they have a V symbol on them Not sure iwjhatf the Canadian (generic) looks like, I think she's hurt herself on purpose and is now contemplating going
to the doctor. We're sliding downhill fast. Please help. This is getting scary.
She has a deteriorating vertebre in and was in recently to see a specialist. I know the pain is real,
but I fear when she went in to genuinely check it out, she was offered a script and didn't turn it down.
During her addiction I discovered she was getting prescriptions from several doctors and using an on-line drug seller from Canada to get more. She fessed up to me afer I confronted and even informed the doctors involved so she couldn't shop them again. Her cell phone has been ringing lateley when I'm with her and she;s admitted that "its those people I hate" calling again. While she shrugs it off, and likely feels like that admission is close to the truth, I think she's using them again.
I need to know what these things look like or if they have a V symbol on them Not sure iwjhatf the Canadian (generic) looks like, I think she's hurt herself on purpose and is now contemplating going
to the doctor. We're sliding downhill fast. Please help. This is getting scary.
Hi believer, I got your reply. Thanks for sharing. I'm sorry you too are not together more.
My wife and I have that issue. She works part time, evenings & weekends. When I'm gone during the weekdays, she's home. She's at work when I get home. She gets home
around 10:00 after I've put the kids in bed. We see each other for about an hour and a half at night, though she only works 2 or 3 nights a week. Still it isn't as much as it needs to be. Does your husband's job dictate his being gone, or is his absence from the
lack of interaction due to the addiction? I ask because I'm trying to figure that question out in my marriage. Is there a way to stake out some specific time together for you and he? I know that if I can focus on time together ahead, I'm much more prepared as a mate
to relate to my wife.
As far as the withdrawls, do you get very tired, very quickly? I'm sure she feels guilty and embarrassed, but I wish she'd be able to let it out.
Thanks for the post. I hope you and your husband have an opportunity to focus on each other soon.
Mustang
My wife and I have that issue. She works part time, evenings & weekends. When I'm gone during the weekdays, she's home. She's at work when I get home. She gets home
around 10:00 after I've put the kids in bed. We see each other for about an hour and a half at night, though she only works 2 or 3 nights a week. Still it isn't as much as it needs to be. Does your husband's job dictate his being gone, or is his absence from the
lack of interaction due to the addiction? I ask because I'm trying to figure that question out in my marriage. Is there a way to stake out some specific time together for you and he? I know that if I can focus on time together ahead, I'm much more prepared as a mate
to relate to my wife.
As far as the withdrawls, do you get very tired, very quickly? I'm sure she feels guilty and embarrassed, but I wish she'd be able to let it out.
Thanks for the post. I hope you and your husband have an opportunity to focus on each other soon.
Mustang
I had my share of Vicodin and indeed they make a pill with the V just like the Van Halen V is on it with a line through it.
10000000% Positive!
I wish you the best with everything in life!
10000000% Positive!
I wish you the best with everything in life!
Thank you for your kind words, they make a difference in the life of someone whos life is falling apart even though "I" am on the mend, my husband still will harbour the resentment of the distrust and lies, but he says we will get through it for the second time. I too lost all interest in intimacy, but partly because he is gone so much and I did get bored and self medicated. He does not understand this at all and would probably go to counseling, but I feel he still will not understand. Unless you are that person and go take this journey you will not understand. They best I could recommend is nar/anon (sp) but I know he won't go by himself. And you know sometimes there just are not enough hours in the day!! especially if you have children which we do not, but you do and that could be tough, but if you want to save your marriage you will find the time I know you will. I do understand your grief we as the addict carry the same grief only we are the opposite person trying to hide everything. I have a wonderful life with my husband and would have probably given it up for the drug if I had not cried out for help. It sounds like your wife may be trying to keep her withdrawls at bay. I have been taking alot of advil for tremendous headaches that go along with the withdrawls and benedryl will calm her nerves so try and give her a little time to come through this and just let her know you are there without bringing the pills up. She will tell you when she is ready, but is to ashamed right now. Believe me she knows what she is doing to your relationship, but the addiction is so much more powerful. Have a great day mustang...talk soon
I appreciate your candor. I never know if asking things from others in your situation are
harmful, or theraputic in some way. Someone in the thread had posted that my wife may have a source she was buying from and that had never entered my mind. That was mainly because her original addiction was supplied (after the doctor shopping quit) by
a Canadian pharmacy. They still call her & she's mentioned that, all under the guis that
she's mad & bothered they still call.
Is your husband involved in counseling with you,,,,or go on his own? I know most men may not want to. Inward reflection is tough for most guys, even if they genuinely try. We're wired differently I feel.
Keep in mind that everyone makes mistakes and has weaknesses. This board and the country littered with people who have weaknesses. You're not alone and your not failing,
you are coping, recovering and learning. Those are good things. I've disappointed my wife
I don't know how many times. Trust can be rebuilt but it takes time. From a spouse standpoint, it's a contrast between loving trust & concerned suspicion when something like this happens. I have trouble overcoming the feeling that I was disregarded with each step, each lie, each decision made to start/continue the addiction. I'm still learning how the judgement clouds when under an influence. How does a person foster trust if their spouse elicits something innocent and it's taken as suspicious? If it is an innocent action misconstrued, the concerned spouse risks coming off as doubting their partner.
This in turn, makes the person who had the addiction feel like a failure. It's a cycle and it's also hard to break. Open communication will be the key to trusting.
You mentioned your husband works out of town. I'd guess lack of one on one interest and time together left an empty feeling in part of you. I know that I work alot too, which is part of our problem. My wife feels neglected when work overtakes family. Our one on one time, communication and intimacy really suffered. I've read on other threads that the addiction takes the place of or mutes the desire for intimacy. Do you feel that is a truth in your situation? It seem in my situation that my partner has been either numbed or become oblivious to what intimacy adds to a relationship. It's like the desire is snuffed.
I'm a very lucky guy. My wife is drop-dead gorgeous. She's my every fantasy every day.
She can melt me with a look and put me on cloud nine. When her interest in me is gone,
I feel really down. This may be a fault in me, but it really puts a strain on the relationship
when she's uninterested in me. I feel alone and held at a distance.
I hope in your journey to regain trust, you can feel open to him for communication of both types. I wish you well and hope you have bright days together ahead. :-)
Mustang
harmful, or theraputic in some way. Someone in the thread had posted that my wife may have a source she was buying from and that had never entered my mind. That was mainly because her original addiction was supplied (after the doctor shopping quit) by
a Canadian pharmacy. They still call her & she's mentioned that, all under the guis that
she's mad & bothered they still call.
Is your husband involved in counseling with you,,,,or go on his own? I know most men may not want to. Inward reflection is tough for most guys, even if they genuinely try. We're wired differently I feel.
Keep in mind that everyone makes mistakes and has weaknesses. This board and the country littered with people who have weaknesses. You're not alone and your not failing,
you are coping, recovering and learning. Those are good things. I've disappointed my wife
I don't know how many times. Trust can be rebuilt but it takes time. From a spouse standpoint, it's a contrast between loving trust & concerned suspicion when something like this happens. I have trouble overcoming the feeling that I was disregarded with each step, each lie, each decision made to start/continue the addiction. I'm still learning how the judgement clouds when under an influence. How does a person foster trust if their spouse elicits something innocent and it's taken as suspicious? If it is an innocent action misconstrued, the concerned spouse risks coming off as doubting their partner.
This in turn, makes the person who had the addiction feel like a failure. It's a cycle and it's also hard to break. Open communication will be the key to trusting.
You mentioned your husband works out of town. I'd guess lack of one on one interest and time together left an empty feeling in part of you. I know that I work alot too, which is part of our problem. My wife feels neglected when work overtakes family. Our one on one time, communication and intimacy really suffered. I've read on other threads that the addiction takes the place of or mutes the desire for intimacy. Do you feel that is a truth in your situation? It seem in my situation that my partner has been either numbed or become oblivious to what intimacy adds to a relationship. It's like the desire is snuffed.
I'm a very lucky guy. My wife is drop-dead gorgeous. She's my every fantasy every day.
She can melt me with a look and put me on cloud nine. When her interest in me is gone,
I feel really down. This may be a fault in me, but it really puts a strain on the relationship
when she's uninterested in me. I feel alone and held at a distance.
I hope in your journey to regain trust, you can feel open to him for communication of both types. I wish you well and hope you have bright days together ahead. :-)
Mustang
I appreciate your candor. I never know if asking things from others in your situation are
harmful, or theraputic in some way. Someone in the thread had posted that my wife may have a source she was buying from and that had never entered my mind. That was mainly because her original addiction was supplied (after the doctor shopping quit) by
a Canadian pharmacy. They still call her & she's mentioned that, all under the guis that
she's mad & bothered they still call.
Is your husband involved in counseling with you,,,,or go on his own? I know most men may not want to. Inward reflection is tough for most guys, even if they genuinely try. We're wired differently I feel.
Keep in mind that everyone makes mistakes and has weaknesses. This board and the country littered with people who have weaknesses. You're not alone and your not failing,
you are coping, recovering and learning. Those are good things. I've disappointed my wife
I don't know how many times. Trust can be rebuilt but it takes time. From a spouse standpoint, it's a contrast between loving trust & concerned suspicion when something like this happens. I have trouble overcoming the feeling that I was disregarded with each step, each lie, each decision made to start/continue the addiction. I'm still learning how the judgement clouds when under an influence. How does a person foster trust if their spouse elicits something innocent and it's taken as suspicious? If it is an innocent action misconstrued, the concerned spouse risks coming off as doubting their partner.
This in turn, makes the person who had the addiction feel like a failure. It's a cycle and it's also hard to break. Open communication will be the key to trusting.
You mentioned your husband works out of town. I'd guess lack of one on one interest and time together left an empty feeling in part of you. I know that I work alot too, which is part of our problem. My wife feels neglected when work overtakes family. Our one on one time, communication and intimacy really suffered. I've read on other threads that the addiction takes the place of or mutes the desire for intimacy. Do you feel that is a truth in your situation? It seem in my situation that my partner has been either numbed or become oblivious to what intimacy adds to a relationship. It's like the desire is snuffed.
I'm a very lucky guy. My wife is drop-dead gorgeous. She's my every fantasy every day.
She can melt me with a look and put me on cloud nine. When her interest in me is gone,
I feel really down. This may be a fault in me, but it really puts a strain on the relationship
when she's uninterested in me. I feel alone and held at a distance.
I hope in your journey to regain trust, you can feel open to him for communication of both types. I wish you well and hope you have bright days together ahead. :-)
Mustang
harmful, or theraputic in some way. Someone in the thread had posted that my wife may have a source she was buying from and that had never entered my mind. That was mainly because her original addiction was supplied (after the doctor shopping quit) by
a Canadian pharmacy. They still call her & she's mentioned that, all under the guis that
she's mad & bothered they still call.
Is your husband involved in counseling with you,,,,or go on his own? I know most men may not want to. Inward reflection is tough for most guys, even if they genuinely try. We're wired differently I feel.
Keep in mind that everyone makes mistakes and has weaknesses. This board and the country littered with people who have weaknesses. You're not alone and your not failing,
you are coping, recovering and learning. Those are good things. I've disappointed my wife
I don't know how many times. Trust can be rebuilt but it takes time. From a spouse standpoint, it's a contrast between loving trust & concerned suspicion when something like this happens. I have trouble overcoming the feeling that I was disregarded with each step, each lie, each decision made to start/continue the addiction. I'm still learning how the judgement clouds when under an influence. How does a person foster trust if their spouse elicits something innocent and it's taken as suspicious? If it is an innocent action misconstrued, the concerned spouse risks coming off as doubting their partner.
This in turn, makes the person who had the addiction feel like a failure. It's a cycle and it's also hard to break. Open communication will be the key to trusting.
You mentioned your husband works out of town. I'd guess lack of one on one interest and time together left an empty feeling in part of you. I know that I work alot too, which is part of our problem. My wife feels neglected when work overtakes family. Our one on one time, communication and intimacy really suffered. I've read on other threads that the addiction takes the place of or mutes the desire for intimacy. Do you feel that is a truth in your situation? It seem in my situation that my partner has been either numbed or become oblivious to what intimacy adds to a relationship. It's like the desire is snuffed.
I'm a very lucky guy. My wife is drop-dead gorgeous. She's my every fantasy every day.
She can melt me with a look and put me on cloud nine. When her interest in me is gone,
I feel really down. This may be a fault in me, but it really puts a strain on the relationship
when she's uninterested in me. I feel alone and held at a distance.
I hope in your journey to regain trust, you can feel open to him for communication of both types. I wish you well and hope you have bright days together ahead. :-)
Mustang
I did have a person I was buying from at $5.00 each and I could take 10 a day aside from the other things I bought and took Plus! the meds I aquired after my mother passed away...Morphine etc. It did not take long for husband to notice money going out of the checking account, but I lied about it (and he knew I was lying), but we just went on. He works out of town most of the time and I had alot of things on me one of them taking care of my mother and was not even getting paid so my husband was paying my bills, but there was so much more money being spent. I finally spilled my guts when I started withdrawals, but the whole time the guilt just killed me and made me use more. I can't say I was releived, but maybe a little. Not angry I couldn't be angry I was the one lying and stealing, but I am an addict, but some people use anger as a defense. I have never been on your end, but I have seen the hurt in my husbands eyes and have seen the damage it has done to his trust in me and it brings me to tears, but I have a disease and only I can fix it and I am doing this as we speak and will spend the rest of my life trying to make this up to him if its not to late. Hang in there mustang. If you love each other it will be worth it and stay in counseling with her and make her bring it out somehow. God Bless your family.
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