Beachtowel

[allaboutmary]

Can you tell me what your advise is to......Alexandra fox...who lives in a country that sells her DOC over the counter. Should she move out of country or never go into a drug store again ?

Or to   Alicenwonderlnd......who has her elderly mother living with her and taking pain pills.  Should she throw her mother out, so as not to be around the pills.

Or to    Loutsatrout  .....who lives in a very rural area and can not get to N/A meetings.

Are you saying to these people that all hope is lost.  That they can never get clean.  I hope not.

[joievicman]

I see all points and think that everyone's input is aimed at recovery.
Tough love and compassion go hand in hand.  We all want to get better
and sometimes we have to hear  or read what we don't want to.
We may disagree sometimes but all discussion is healthy, for me anyway.
I haven't been posting as much but I have come to the forum every day several times a day  since coming out about my drug addiction and just reading various post helps me greatly.

My thoughts at this moment,
joievicman

[allaboutmary]

Great Post.  I get everything you are saying.  Mary

[what2donow]

Hey guys,I just wanted to say I see both sides of this disscussion.I am a newbie to the group and cant help feeling that alot of this is all my fault.I had my feelings hurt by beachtowel when I very first started posting.It caused kinda a big deal.Maybe I was wrong to be so sensative.Beach contacted me and we did clear the air.Today I would actually call him one of my closest friends here though not my most sensative,but he is supportive.I can see what the others are saying too.I was very new and actually cried at alot of the conversation that beach and I and the forum had.I was very close to not comming here anymore,but a few wonderful,encouraging people asked me to keep posting and like I said then beach and myself talked and cleared things up.
I guess I said all of that to say this.Beach is a good person and I really dont think he means to"hurt" anyone.Alot of guys do have a sensitivity chip, missing and I think beach is guilty of that ;)
Beach is also very smart and a good sorce of information on alot of this stuff.He is also very passionate about this stuff.I have said it and I will again,I do wish he would consider peoples feelings before he speaks.The old saying is sooo true,you can win more flies with honey than vinigar.

Lots of Love guys
Jennifer

[CATUF]

Wow.  Talk about something that requires strength!  You guys are amazing!

[beachtowel]

When you can admit your problems you are already on the healing process........

I can't be around people using either david or I will use it is as simple as that I am an addict.....
a drug addict .......I'm in recovery now but it could change in a flash if I'm not careful.......
that is why I go to N/A

[david0263]

I've been an addict since I was 13 years old.  For me, if I am to stay clean long term then there is no chance that I can go to a bar and no chance that I can hang with friends that are actively abusing any type of drug including pain pills.  People with pills in the house is fine, as long as they are not abusing them or if they are don't do it in front of me.  If I am going to change then I have to make changes in my life and those changes won't be easy...nothing worth having ever is.

David

[flmagi]

we are all addicts, however and wherever we got there.
Herion addicts on the street or soccer moms in the suburbs, we are no different in the fact we are addicted to somthing.
Some of us need tuff love and some need encouragement.
We all need support in one way or the other.

[beachtowel]

thank you

[beachtowel]

Mary please stay away from my posts I really think that your trying to draw me into drama.....I am asking nicely leave me alone.......

I will agree to this no matter how much validity I put into a point of fact you will disagree I get it so please stay away from me.......

[allaboutmary]

You got it ! No problem.

[beachtowel]

Mary please stay away from my posts I really think that your trying to draw me into drama.....I am asking nicely leave me alone.......

I will agree to this no matter how much validity I put into a point of fact you will disagree I get it so please stay away from me.......

[beachtowel]

Mary please stay away from my posts I really think that your trying to draw me into drama.....I am asking nicely leave me alone.......

I will agree to this no matter how much validity I put into a point of fact you will disagree I get it so please stay away from me.......

[beachtowel]

Mary please stay away from my posts I really think that your trying to draw me into drama.....I am asking nicely leave me alone.......

I will agree to this no matter how much validity I put into a point of fact you will disagree I get it so please stay away from me........

[beachtowel]

Mary please stay away from my posts I really think that your trying to draw me into drama.....I am asking nicely leave me alone.......

I will agree to this no matter how much validity I put into a point of fact you will disagree I get it so please stay away from me........

[beachtowel]

Mary please stay away from my posts I really think that your trying to draw me into drama.....I am asking nicely leave me alone.......

I will agree to this no matter how much validity I put into a point of fact you will disagree I get it so please stay away from me........

[allaboutmary]

You said ..........Mary if you disagree with these fundamentals then your ridiculous and have a lot to learn.

Just read your post again 3 times.  I think I answered you correctly.

[beachtowel]

Mary please stay away from my posts I really think that your trying to draw me into drama.....I am asking nicely leave me alone.......

I will agree to this no matter how much validity I put into a point of fact you will disagree I get it so please stay away from me........

[beachtowel]

again you post has nothing to do with anything that I said..........you mixed up everything.......
I would recommend that you read slower or something.......and most of all never try to think for me..........my post is right above yours and I am looking at them both....one thing is for sure one of us needs glasses

[allaboutmary]

I guess we need to agree to disagree. Here is why.  I have sat next to alcoholic's at a bar that have many many years clean.  They go to many functions where alcohol is around. They don't drink anymore period.  I don't personally have any friends that take tons of pain pills, but they do have it in there house because of legit problems with pain.  I will not toss these friends aside because of my problem. They actually give me support.  I think the stone that those rules are written on needs to be tossed in the garbage.  

[beachtowel]

If you an alcoholic you cannot hang in bars...........
If all your friends take tons of narcotics pain pills everyday you have to get new friends...........

If you disagree with these than I know for a fact you have never spent time in an inpatient rehab faclitiy or took any addiction classes so your answers are all based on opinion and that is scary when your giving advice..........


Mary if you disagree with these fundamentals then your ridiculous and have a lot to learn............

[beachtowel]

I disagree with your post because your dead wrong..........

NO ONE WAY TO GET CLEAN IS CORRECT.....>>>>>>WRONG

There are fundamentals that apply 100% of the time.......

If you an alcoholic you cannot hang in bars...........
If all your friends take tons of narcotics pain pills everyday you have to get new friends...........


things like that are written in stone for all addicts ..........

[allaboutmary]

I was just using these people as examples.  Not your posts to them individually.  It is your posts to some of the new comers that concerns me.  They are looking for hope, some in situations that are not ideal for getting clean. I also liked Jennys responce because she gave options. NO ONE WAY TO GET CLEAN IS CORRECT and there is hope for everyone, in every situation, if the will to get clean is there.  You said in one of your posts that if our life long friends have pain pills we should not see them any longer ( they are not addicts) and I find that absolutley rediculous. I swore to myself I would not get involved in the drama that goes on, but I am concerned about the new comers to this forum, a few negative remarks and they won't come back.  That makes me sad as this forum was a life saver for me.

[beachtowel]

This was my response to Lotsatrout's post to there relapse post........

Where did allaboutmary get her interpertation of my response from what I posted above.....I wish someone would explain it to me........

[beachtowel]

I just went back and cut my response to his post so I cut it andnow I'll past it.......please tell me how I handled this so wrong ok???

beachtowel
  



11/18/07
Lotsatrout  "Sorry if you let any of us down"  none of us are effected by you using or not using......so why would you say your sorry to us.........

Your the one that matters and nobody else......until you fix yourself nobody can do anything for you to help or support nothing..........

Its all on you........by the way did you like my football game post yesterday you would indulged for sure........