I have a son who is detoxing from pills as we speak..I want to know how to help him stay off the drugs.and does anyone know of a chip or something to that they put underthe skin to help stop the cravings?
Thank you
Thanks for taking the time to reply and your comments. We feel sorry for our son but we do not intend to enable him to continue with this drug lifestyle. We do not and won't give him any money or pay his cell phone etc and he knows that. But, at the same time, we are aware that by his renting our basement apartment that we are enabling him in a way. However, by having him here we can at least keep an eye on him and be in a position to help him out with his addiction. We had a serious talk with him today and he knows that this is his last chance. He has to go to addiction and clean up his life and regain our trust. If he can't do that, then he will have to fight this on his own, as we can no longer put up with it. His lifestyle and the worry over him OD'ng and the abuse of his physical health is affecting our lives too. I will check out the Alanon Support groups. Both my parents were alcoholics so I have seen addictions firsthand for most of my life and my husband is a recovered alcoholic too. The funny thing is that I swore I would never drink or do drugs or put my children through what I experienced and now I have to sit by and watch my son repeat it all over again, which just brings back even more sadder memories.
I had two serious surgeries this past summer and am still recovering from the hernia rupture and the total rearrangement of my stomach. I had enough injections of morphine and pain killers that would kill a horse but I still have my pain meds left over that I haven't even finished taking, since I didn't want to risk getting addicted to them. I suffer from nerve pain and take neurontin for that but only take the minimum dosage to ease the pain so I can sleep. I have suffered through burning nerve pain so bad that I would have sawed off the foot and leg to stop the pain. The sad reality is that too many people are fighting for their lives when they get sick with cancer, etc. and there are other cases that risk their lives on a daily basis by playing russian roulette with their drug use.
You need to go to Alanon. It would really help to show you how you are enabling your son and what you should do to help yourself first, and hopefully would be helping your son at the same time. His addiction is affecting you so much but you are making excuses for him. My mother does the same thing with my little brother. He is 22 and has been doing drugs since he was 16 as well. He tells me it is just a couple of times a month, but I don't believe him. He is always running out of money and needing to be bailed out of a situation every week because he goes through his money so fast. My parents give him money every Monday or Tuesday and he always has some excuse why he needs it. This is their baby and they won't let or make him grow up and pay the consequences of his own actions. I keep telling my mother what she needs to do but I feel like I am talking to a brick wall. She never takes my advice and then tells me I am jealous of my little brother. I guess they think I am jealous because they do so much for him. He took over my mother's new car and she let him. Instead of him going out and getting his own car, my mother gave him hers because my dad retired so now he can take her to work everyday. Not to mention them paying his cell phone every month, and they give him money for rent. This is all enabling him not to ever be responsible for himself. I feel sorry for him because they never put any boundaries on him. He doesn't even come to see them for their birthdays or for most family functions and hollidays. Even his own birthday two weeks ago he did not come to see them after my mom planned a family b-day party and baked him a cake. He said he had a headache or a tooth ache. I don't remember which it was. He is so selfish and only cares about himself.
Whatever you do, make your son responsible for himself so you are not a babysitter like you suggested. I highly recommend getting some Alonon material to read or go to a meeting. They are very informative and helpful. Good luck and God bless.
I agree you cant babysitt for him forever but if you throw him out, what will happen. Go along to the meetings with him, help him go into rehab and see if he is really willing to do it this time. I know a lot of people will disagree with me but i couldnt just put my son out and just re-rent his room. We bring our kids into this world and i feel we must help them all the way, that is our job as mothers. Putting him out into the street could even make him worse and just put him into a downward spiral of harder drugs and a worse lifestyle. At least just now he is still working and giving you his rent money. Id give him all the help he needed and see what happens when he goes into rehab but i woulodnt make any rash decisions just now.....Kim
Sometimes tough love is the only way. Until he is willing to help himself, there is not a lot you can do, just DO NOT enable him and DO NOT find excuses for him. I agree, you should not have to be his babysitter, you don't have to take on his addiction. I wish your family the best and here is a link for alanon, I think if you went it could help you, help him. Take care:)
http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/english.html
Show him this forum maybe he will read something that strikes home. AND YOU go to a Alanon meeting.
Your son can easily die in his lifestyle. You can rent the room to another person if you need to.