Aa
Its been 42 hours and I really want to take a pill.
Its been about 42 hours since my last .25 xanax and Im doing pretty ok but my mind keeps telling me to take one. I have them upstairs and its taking all my willpower to not take one. I slept ok last nite. I had to take a benadryl but it did put me to sleep. But now im feeling shaky and kind of anxious about not taking a pill. I really dont want to take one and have to start all over but its getting to be overwhelming.
Erin, i agree with all the posts above...you would need dealing with your anxiety in another way... obssessive thoughts go along with anxiety and we need dealing and overcoming them and learn the tools to control them... I suffered from a lot of anxiety last year. I didn't want to go for some medication as the first step, i didn't want to depend on another pill, you know. Therapy helped me to learn how to control my anxiety and the mild panic attacks i was starting to have in the morning, i know there are severe panic attacks that need medication. But for general anxiety, I would go for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, it may not be an instant solution but pills are not a solution either cause they don't give us the tools to deal with anxiety ... so it took me a couple of months until i saw results but erin, it did worked with my anxiety.... i have it under control now and haven't had a panic attack for a year.... I am talking of my anxiety cause as i have said, there is severe anxiety that need both, meds and therapy.
All the best :)
All the best :)
I think tramhater hit the nail on the head with the term "happy pill". When I served in Iraq I met a lot of great friends. Luckily one of my good friends that I met only lives about 4 hours away from me. Him and his family make it a point to head over for a weekend a few times a year so we can spend some time together. A few years ago he started on an antidepressant. The showed up on a Friday and he realized that he forgot his "happy pills" and that is exactly how his wife and him refer to them. Luckily his wife had a two in her purse from a previous trip somewhere but only enough to get him through Sunday. But they were leaving Monday morning so once he got home he could take it. He always took it right when he got up in the morning so he was so anxious the whole time he was here. He couldn't shake the thought that he would have to go a few extra hours without his "happy pill". It seemed to totally throw him off and he wasn't the same person. We always have such a good time together and it just wasn't the same this time. He was a nervous wreck! When they got to our house Friday night we stayed up pretty late catching up. We let him and his wife sleep in so my wife and got up to get all the kids breakfast. They didn't end up getting up til a little after 10 am so he didn't end up taking his "happy pill" until then which was about 4 hours later than normal. Since he wasn't quite himself I mentioned to him how he took his pill later than normal so what's the big deal about not taking it until he got home on Monday since they are leaving early and would be home no later than noon. He didn't really say much, he was still just very anxious about the whole trip.
What I'm trying to get at is he couldn't get the thought out of his head that he wouldn't have his "happy pill" because he thought he needed it that morning. He stressed himself out more just by thinking it into the ground. He was already relying on that pill even before he thought he needed it. The xanax for you was the same way. You probably felt better the second you took it even before it dissolved in your system. They became a mental crutch. Kinda like cigarettes are a mental crutch for some. When someone gets stressed they say they need a cigarette. The second they light it up they feel better. You need to find a new mental crutch. (and no, I don't mean cigarettes)!!! It can be anything such as a walk around the block or laying in a dark room listening to some slow music. Just make it about you. It doesn't have to take long if you don't want it to. If you have a favorite song that relaxes you make sure you carry a mp3 player with you everywhere you go and take a few minutes by yourself and listen to it. Heck, if you have to lock yourself in the bathroom go for it. If you can learn how to "stop the clock" for a second when you feel an anxious moment coming on you just may be able to catch it. It's all about distracting yourself or directing your thought somewhere else. Once you get in the habit of dealing with these little stressful situations you will eventually learn how to deal with them.
Do you know if you are done taking the xanax for good? If you have made up your mind that you are done you need to get rid of the ones you have left. There is no way anyone here could keep a few of the pills around even if they planned on being done. The temptation would be too strong. Even if the temptation wasn't strong when any kind of anxious moment came up the first thing we would think about would be those few little extra pills we have stashed away. It would be impossible to not think about them. So if you know you aren't doing to continue on with a taper, which you are well past the taper, then you have to get rid of them. Just doing that will make little stressful situations, like that phone call, much easier to deal with. And I said deal with, not think about a pill which you will be doing as long as they are still in your possession.
At this point you don't need detox. You need to learn how to deal with the anxiety. Like you said, the reason they say you need detox is because you got some from a friend before. They look at that as an addictive behavior and according to their "detox book" any addiction behavior means you are an addict and they don't think anyone can quit using on their own. So let that phone call go. If you needed inpatient you would have had most of this forum telling you to go. You are doing great and will continue to do great. Keep doing what you are doing. You are seeing a therapist. You come here to ask questions and to distract yourself. And you are going to make it through this just fine. Don't feel bad for coming here and talking so much. It's great that it distracts you. The main reason of this forum is to help one another so you post as much as you need to.
Hang in there. You have a great plan in place and it's working!
brian
What I'm trying to get at is he couldn't get the thought out of his head that he wouldn't have his "happy pill" because he thought he needed it that morning. He stressed himself out more just by thinking it into the ground. He was already relying on that pill even before he thought he needed it. The xanax for you was the same way. You probably felt better the second you took it even before it dissolved in your system. They became a mental crutch. Kinda like cigarettes are a mental crutch for some. When someone gets stressed they say they need a cigarette. The second they light it up they feel better. You need to find a new mental crutch. (and no, I don't mean cigarettes)!!! It can be anything such as a walk around the block or laying in a dark room listening to some slow music. Just make it about you. It doesn't have to take long if you don't want it to. If you have a favorite song that relaxes you make sure you carry a mp3 player with you everywhere you go and take a few minutes by yourself and listen to it. Heck, if you have to lock yourself in the bathroom go for it. If you can learn how to "stop the clock" for a second when you feel an anxious moment coming on you just may be able to catch it. It's all about distracting yourself or directing your thought somewhere else. Once you get in the habit of dealing with these little stressful situations you will eventually learn how to deal with them.
Do you know if you are done taking the xanax for good? If you have made up your mind that you are done you need to get rid of the ones you have left. There is no way anyone here could keep a few of the pills around even if they planned on being done. The temptation would be too strong. Even if the temptation wasn't strong when any kind of anxious moment came up the first thing we would think about would be those few little extra pills we have stashed away. It would be impossible to not think about them. So if you know you aren't doing to continue on with a taper, which you are well past the taper, then you have to get rid of them. Just doing that will make little stressful situations, like that phone call, much easier to deal with. And I said deal with, not think about a pill which you will be doing as long as they are still in your possession.
At this point you don't need detox. You need to learn how to deal with the anxiety. Like you said, the reason they say you need detox is because you got some from a friend before. They look at that as an addictive behavior and according to their "detox book" any addiction behavior means you are an addict and they don't think anyone can quit using on their own. So let that phone call go. If you needed inpatient you would have had most of this forum telling you to go. You are doing great and will continue to do great. Keep doing what you are doing. You are seeing a therapist. You come here to ask questions and to distract yourself. And you are going to make it through this just fine. Don't feel bad for coming here and talking so much. It's great that it distracts you. The main reason of this forum is to help one another so you post as much as you need to.
Hang in there. You have a great plan in place and it's working!
brian
I know they need to go. I actually haven't taken one since tuesday evening. Now its just a matter of getting rid of my security blanket. My therapist said I'd be fine to stop taking them. I took them originally for anxiety but the more I think about it the more I realize I started taking them for any stress at all. I think I'm going to make myself a really nice dinner tomorrow. I'm really bad at cooking so I have to focus all of my brainpower on it.
Hey Erin, have you heard the saying "happy pills?" That is what you have been using them for. Probably not so much for any serious problem. You just think you need them to be happy, so therefore you do. Now, I'm not saying that you don't have anxiety, but as I sat here and read this thread I could see you go from calm to very anxious over "thinking" about a pill or phone call or a detox. That isn't WD symptoms. That is just regular old anxiety. But I think you may be stressing yourself into it, and that may be your biggest hurdle to overcome. Try not to think so much. Get out. Move around. Don't stay in the house. Get a pedicure. Massage. Something to relax away from the house. I usually don't say this about benzos, but I think you should get rid of them. The reason you are thinking about them is that you HAVE them. You are on such a small dose now, you could probably stop. You need to ask the doc or pharmacist to be sure, but I don't think that what you are still taking is doing you ANY good at all! It's only causing you to obsess about it!
I just want to see you be able to calm down! Ok? Try doing something nice for yourself tomorrow! : ) It IS going to be ok!
I just want to see you be able to calm down! Ok? Try doing something nice for yourself tomorrow! : ) It IS going to be ok!
i made it through 56 hours. thanks for the support. i think im more anxious about NOT taking the pills than anything else. they always made me feel so calm and happy...no anxiety. this ***** big time. i hate feeling all amped up for no reason. its time for bed...hopefully. im going to flush the rest of my pills when i get to the beach. they keep calling my name from my purse.
Erin~ Forget that phone call. They obviously don't have your whole picture. Call your therapist and have a chat. There is such a thing as generalized anxiety disorder and she can help you with that.
Good luck!
Good luck!
i posted over there but they are pro medication. they just ask me why in the world would i want to stop taking my drugs. its somewhat frustrating. at least here when im tempted to take a pill people are supportive of me not taking it.
Erin,
I think you would get more help in the Anxiety Forum. Anxiety is certainly a symptom of withdrawal but you are not in withdrawal so I think there is more going on than a Substance Abuse Forum can help you with. You should call a doctor about this.
I hope it all works out for you.
I think you would get more help in the Anxiety Forum. Anxiety is certainly a symptom of withdrawal but you are not in withdrawal so I think there is more going on than a Substance Abuse Forum can help you with. You should call a doctor about this.
I hope it all works out for you.
I'm officially at 48 hours. The anxiety is awful. I was fine all day until stupid rehab called me...then of course the anxiety kicked in. But at this point I should be ok. I dont want the last 48 hours to be a waste. I just keep reminding myself that I was fine yesterday and all day until the phone call so i am fine now. sorry i keep posting so much...its a nice distraction
You are obsessing a lot today. If you don't calm yourself down you may just talk yourself into that pill. You need to find a way to relax.
I keep thinking about the phone call and now I feel like my panic attacks are giving me withdrawal symptoms. I was fine all day until that phone call.
I saw my counselor last night. She thinks my anxiety is bad but I shouldn't worry about detox because at this point I'm almost through. It'll be 48 hours at 630 tonight..in about 3 hours and so far I'm just anxious. Which is expected because I do have anxiety issues. I was never abusing xanax. I was taking it to treat my anxiety problem..but as soon as I told them I got my most recent pills from my friend since my insurance was gone they thought I had some huge problem. She even said on the phone she thought I'd still be taking them.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Then continue to feel good and positive. You have to do what you feel is right. Hook up with a counselor and work on this anxiety. Dont let the detox center scare you.....
Because I was feeling good and positive like this is just about over and they want me to do detox. So it seems like its prolonging it...like I'm really messed up.
The detox center just called me and said the dr wants me to do detox. I told her that I haven't taken a pill in well over 40 hours now but they still want me to do detox? I feel like at this point I can do it myself. Apparently they wanted my friend to do inpatient detox for weed. I don't know what to make of this place.
sarah...looks like we r having another flushing of the pills party... yay!!
erin...i really think ballgame is right. the anxiey level will drop once u get rid of those pills. thats what it did for me. once i got rid of them i no longer had to worry about relapsing on my pills. out of site and out of mind. u can do it. good luck...keep urself busy, busy, and oh yea more busy
erin...i really think ballgame is right. the anxiey level will drop once u get rid of those pills. thats what it did for me. once i got rid of them i no longer had to worry about relapsing on my pills. out of site and out of mind. u can do it. good luck...keep urself busy, busy, and oh yea more busy
COMMUNITY LEADER
Get yourself busy with something. Go outside and get some fresh air. That seems to help. Soak in the bathtub with lots of bubbles.....There are other ways to deal with the anxiety without pills. As for the pills, as long as they are in the house they will be calling your name. Make a plan to get rid of them. sara
How about you give them to someone to hold?
I'd flush, that will free up anxiety. You're anxious because you know you have them
I'd flush, that will free up anxiety. You're anxious because you know you have them
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