Got a problem and need advice please :(

[Mandapanda17]

hi guys. okay, most of you already know that I was addicted to norco(10mgvicodin) for about 4 years.Now I've gone to see my PCP and he has now give me 2mg of xanax a day and 10mg of lexapro. He also wants to send me to see a mental health specialist, BIG problem with that is, I don't have mental health coverage. My biggest question is, to those of you that have been clean..for even say a couple months..do you believe this is necessary?! should I stay with my PCP and try to take as little xanax as possible and stay away from the Phyciatrist?? I KNOW they're only going to want to keep me on meds for a while and this was NOT my goal. I desperately want to be clean from all medications. Anyone been through this after being addicted to opiates?? Will I get better with my anxiety and panic on my own or should I go to mental health?? thanks so much to all. you've all been there for me when I've needed it most :) xoxoxo

[kellster]

ok i am going threw the panic and anxiety to the last 2 days i am on day 13 of being of
percs. my doctor today put me on xanax  but i don't think i am going to take them i
don't want to get adicted to them never had them so i don't no what they do.i just keep
breathing and trying to walk it is sooo hard at times but we will get threw this.i will be praying for you.good luck/sorry not much help but i just wanted to tell you that you are not alone.

[Mandapanda17]

all I know is that this could open up a whole new can of worms...so to speak.. I've been on a LOW dosage of xanax for 6 months...but now after withdrawal I feel like I'm manic, anxious, and even insane at times. I cover it all up well. definitely some mental problems going on... how long were you on the percs? Be CAREFUL with the xanax. I was able to only use it as needed a couple times in the past..because it made me VERY sleepy. now of course it doesn't, which is where all of this fear is coming from.. I think I already know the answer to my post...I just need validation from people who have been down this road before...I'll pray for you too, this is probably the hardest thing we'll EVER have to overcome, we can do it :)

[sweetmomma_7]

My Dr. wouldn't give me xanax because it could be another bad addictive pill. Have you heard of suboxone? That for me was my way off of everything I was taking. I did learn that doing it cold turkey is hard but start taking nice hot baths. This will pass and then you will have the mental part to deal with. As far as a therapist that is up to you, but I have found that it has helped through me treatment.

You both can do this,

sweetmomma

[Mandapanda17]

thanks for the response :) I can't go the suboxone route, due to insurance issues, and since I've been clean for 11 days...I just don't wanna. I don't have a bathtub...we're moving in december and I will then! :) thanks for your kind words...I know I can do this. Its just the hardest thing I've ever had to do..xoxo

[joangy]

I think this is just a road block in your recovery- you will get thru it!! it is so crazy that everyday brings a new set of feelings thru this thing! Today I am on day 20 and for some crazy reason I feel like i did the first week!! I have been having chills and hot flashes as well as panic ALL day!! I am trying to push thru it and tell myself that is from a lack of sleep (I got 4 hours of sleep last night from RLS)! I remember enemy48 telling me she had bad days on day 16 and 17 so I am hoping tomorrow will bring about change and I will feel better!

I was comtemplating seeing a mental health specialist with all this addiction stuff, but I have been trying to battle it on my own- if you have the means... I would do it, but don't put yourself in a bind because of it... you have been really strong so far and you will get past this anxiety!!

[kellster]

i was on the percs for 13 months i toke 2 to 3 a day for about 4 months then went up to 4 then 5 then 6 stoped at six i thought i would be over this soon sence i did not take as
much as some but wow was i wrong well i am threw the worst now it can only get better
i think lol i don't think i am going to take the xanax does anyone no about valume if i only
take it at night to sleep i think that if i get some sleep i will not have so many panic atacks and anxsiety? 13 days and counting wow i can not wait till i can say 30 days. good luck to all

[Mandapanda17]

thanks to both of you. I need to cut back on the xanax, I don't want this to be long term for me. I'm done with meds altogether. its just getting ridiculous, with all the panic and anxiety! I don't really have the means to see the phyc. or mental health because I have no coverage for that with my insurance...maybe a good thing? oh and kellster, I know valium is a longer acting benzo than xanax, might help you sleep longer, but PLEASE be careful. I know these benzos are h3ll to say the least. I'll be praying for all of us :)

[kellster]

thanks for the advice i will try to get some just a few maybe i will take one every few days for a week just to catch up on some sleep hang in there. remember god don't give us no more then we can bare . xoxoxo oh and talk to a friend or familly or us on here it helps with the panic atacks

[Mandapanda17]

thanks, you keep hanging in there too :) we can do this...keep praying and I will too :)

[broknbck]

I'm not sure what is in Cymbalta or how it works. but it did wonders for my depression and panic that i was experiencing. i was on it for about 5 months and had no problem stopping. tappering down and then no nothing. ha

As far as the pysciatrist goes. It is up to you.I had reached a suicidal point in my life and the vicodins cured that temporarily until i had made the changes in my life that made me not want to be suicidal anymore. without drugs or with. no physciatrist. but if you are unable to do this yourself, well better go see them. money is nothing if you are unable to have a happy life.??

[Mandapanda17]

thats what I want ultimately...no nothing :) Soooooo, i think I've decided that I'm going to do the slow taper off the minimal amount of xanax that I've been taking and stay on the low dose of lexapro and see how that works out for me. I don't have coverage to see the phsyc. anyway. Maybe I will ask my doctor about Cymbalta and see if he thinks that might work better for me. going to keep as low on the xanax as possible. scary drug too! And all I wanted in the first place was to be clean. NEVER going back to the opiates! thanks again :)

[justme__]

MANDA. You are right. You did kind of write the same thing as me. We are in like the same situation, minus the psychiatrist. The psychiatrist has helped me a lot... not with the xanax obviously cause that was a mistake.. but with the zoloft, it has helped a ton with the anxiety.. but it has made my insomnia a little worse. We are doing good off the opiates!! We need to keep up the good work!! :p Thanks for everything manda and I am always here for you too.

[Mandapanda17]

thanks :) you know I'm always here for you too. we can do this..life can get hard, but we have to make it through this :) ttys!!

[worried878]

I dont think u r crazy...just getting ur brain back in shape...dont know about this psyche doc stuff..may not know ur whole history other than ur narcotic addiction...2 mg of xanax is really too much to use for detox...valium would have been safer..after 2 weeks u really need to think about letting the benzos go..especially if u r using them for sleep...anything we use for sleep can be overwhelmingly addicting...have u had a prior problem with benzos?...if not u need to taper on down and get off due to a couple of weeks u should not be addicted....tolerating 2 mg of xanax a day is alot for someone with no benzo use prior to detox...1 mg will knock most people out for the day....think about ur situation and look at it from what u know about urself...do u think u have a benzo problem?  do u think u have a psychiatric issue or r u just in detox...which will drive most crazy for sure...but many addicts are not really "crazy"   just addicted

[Kova]

I agree with your choice.  i wouldn't go to the mental health dr. unless i had coverage.  sounds expensive.  you seem like you got this handled, even though you are going through hell.  i am right there with you all the way!

Kova

[Mandapanda17]

I wouldn't say that I have a benzo addiction yet, thats my fear I guess..as far as a prior problem with benzos, I'd been taking .25mg to sleep for about 5-6 months because I already couldn't sleep on the norco. and now slowly but surely built up tolerance to the xanax (which I hear can happen pretty quickly?) the good news is I've been keeping at 1.5 mgs for the past few days. Sadinmichigan gave me a good taper schedule for my short term usage and accordingly to the dose I've been up to the last few days. I think the doctor is nuts for wanting me to take 2 mgs a day honestly! since the melatonin seems to have helped a lot with my nightime usage of xanax I'm going to cut a little out at a time. I'm also going to work the valerian root in tonight as well and only take .5mg of xanax. I'm pretty sure I'll sleep.. the melatonin helped a lot. I don't want to be addicted to benzos..for gods sake I just got rid of the opiates! however, I don't want to feel like I'm going to have a heart attack at any moment...make sense? thanks for the response. :) xo

[Mandapanda17]

I think I can do this. I've only been on benzos short term and hopefully the 10mg of lexapro will start helping my anxiety as well :) xo

[Mandapanda17]

I forgot to add this, I think I'm in detox. I was taking opiates for 4 years at least, I guess my question is, could I have caused a physciatric issue?!?! Maybe...

[broknbck]

sure. are you taking the amino acids?

[Kova]

i often wonder the same thing myself.  i think i really did a number on the balance of neurotransmitters in my brain.  wellbutrin helps me the most, so i assume it is my dopamine levels that are off.

[Mandapanda17]

no aminos I guess, been doubling up on the multi-vitamin and trying my best to get exercise. I've gotten more exercise than expected so far. which aminos are ok to take with 10mg of lexapro? see, thats where I get worried...

[worried878]

no......nothing that is not repairable...i do not remeber ur dose but i think it was close to mine..80-100 mg a day/hydro for 4 years/atleast for me.....the brain needs time to repair and they say 90 days is the minimum to start functioning where u dont feel depressed at times from it...permanent damage?  a bit as wee built extra receptors during use to handle the overload of the dopamine release as we were supplementing with pills..bombarding our brains at one time..so it built extra receptors to hand le the release...and they do not go away..but they will go to sleep after a while...in the meantime those extra recptors will crave/will be hungry for what we are no longer feeding it....if u use again they quickly wake up and that is why ur tolerence will go right back to where it was before..let them sleep..dont use them..the body is a fine tuned mechanism and if u dont use them they will become dormant...but these extra receptors will never go away unfortunately....r we now crazy?   no but we are addicts with extra receptors that will make us want to use till we stay away long enuf to make them go to sleep   and let us rest and get back to peace in our brain and life...then we feel back to human again.....did i get that across?

[Mandapanda17]

awesome :) you definitely got that across. I believe I need to work my way off ALL meds and let my body heal itself and get all the way back to normal. I'd rather at least wait until 90 days has passed and then assess how I'm feeling mentally again. I've been down this road of AD's before and I'm not sure it ever helped, maybe worsened the situation. thank you very much. tapering xanax time...:)

[Kova]

yes, that was well put.