HELP ME!

[huntermind]

hi people
i kicked oc and suboxen 2 weeks ago ..pretty much cold turkey except for a few bong hits here and there to help me relax and eat ....the last time i did anything opiate was alomst 2 weeks ago and that was a quarter peice of suboxen....i got thru the worst last week and this week it just lingered and drove me mentally crazy but i stayed busy and surfed a bunch and that helped a bit ...i started feeling normal like a few days ago but still couldent sleep more than 3 hours a night and i had horrible dreams from my girlfriend cheating on me to me shooting up h (which ive never ever done) mostly depressing stuff , no good dreams at all . my will power was weak and i relapsed not knowing what was at stake.
i slipped this weekend and did a forty mill on fri and one on sat. and a couple today. this **** is no joke and no wonder its a worldwide probelm..... and i feel like i have no control when its put in front of me...
i feel soooooooooooooooooooooooooo weak upstairs(in my head) and i cant explain why i did them and im really scared that im gonna have to go thru the same level of discomfort that i did the fiirst week.
SO how strong will my withdrawls be this week since i only did a few 40s over the weeekend????????????
after 2 yrs of my suboxen and oc struggle ....i gave myself 2 weeks of being opiate free and i really hope that wasnt for nothing cuz it was pretty challenging to say the least. i think im gonna check myself into rehab tomrow or tues if it gets crazy again , i cant do it alone again and im praying that i wont feel as bad this week as i did these last two weeks!!!!!!!! im stressing cuz i relapsed and its bringing me down so much , why would i ever wanna do this to myself again but i did and i really wanted to just stay strong , oxy has humbled me ........it has showed me how weak i am cuz after all my drama and my hellish existance while im on oc just makes me wanna give up.
im no quitter  and the reality of what could possibly be lost over all this ...scares the **** outa me.....
what can i do to lessen the symtoms of withdrawling? other than stay of the **** all together ...duh i kno im weak.
and if someone can plz give me some advice about a diet that can help me ...that would b great.
any natural remedies that can help the symtoms?

[NautyOne]

If you don't make it to a meeting.  Dont' touch another one, if your lucky and skate by with little to nothing, dont think you can use once in a while......if that were the case none of us would be here.  I hope you don't get bit too hard.  

Don't do it again.........

luv,
nauty...........

[worried878]

CATUF has a point..90 days is the approximate amount of time to let ur brain heal enuf to get over the depression and let ur brain kick in on endorphin production...exercise helps boost endorphins as well...but aftercare is the only proven method for success..people worry bunches bout physical wds...and no ur physical wds shouldnt be much at all if any...but the mental stback u may have cuased can be huge..and that is where this whole process takes place...upstairs..we control what we do..and ur mind is what will keep u clean

Have u skimmed the health pages?  If u have not then there is tons of info on foods, supps, dopamine...etc..things to help...read the thomas recipe too...great info there

[redrodeo]

Man I am really impressed with your determination and your success. You may not see it as a success but it is. Everyday that you don't use is a miracle. Just like the people before said AA or NA will help alot. You cannot do this yourself. You have a mental illness that blinds you. Relapsing is really comman. So any day clean is a BIG victory. Up until a few years ago I had 10 years clean. I had to start taking narcotics for a illgimate health problem. But now the health problem has been solved and I can't stop. I really feel like s===t. But I am going to get back. Tomorrow I go see a doctor about stopping this cycle. So lets hang in there. There are millions of people in recovery. I am not differnet and neither are you.
Red

[peaceinknowing]

What you're going through right now is called relapse, and it happens all the time. You have to stop beating yourself over this and just move on from here. Keep going down the path to getting your life back and recovery and everything will end up being just fine. If you suffer any further withdrawl symptoms, it probably won't be as bad as what you're thinking it'll be in your head. Best of luck to you, and I hope you check out some sort of NA/AA meetings nearby where you're located. One of the biggest thing in your recovery is staying clean from the pills -- NA can help you with this.

[CATUF]

that should have been "one NA or AA meeting a day for the next 90 days."

[CATUF]

I suggest a diet of at least one NA or AA meeting for the next 90 days.

If you use doring that 90 days period, don't spend too much time worrying about it, but stop immediately and re-start your 90-day meeting clock.

CATUF
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