I need a good support group

[swagger39]

Its hard goin this alone. Im soon going to be weening from klonapin from 2mg a day at twice a day for a lot of years. I have this beer drinking addiction going on at the same time , and that is usually after I get off work at midnight, its kind of like a wherewolf thing, I only indulge at night and hate myself the next day. Both these addictions escalated after I went off on my boss threw my badge and keys at him and walked out after 8 yrs from the best job I ever had and that was in 2004, My benzos increased over time and so did my drinking. I had previously lived in key west and in my mind I wanted to be there so I started listening to jimmy buffett , started drinking corona and escaped reality of the life in the midwest. Those days are gone now and I have gotten older but the drugs and the beer are still there.

[avisg]

Welcome to the forum ,
ok so you have two diffrent problems going on here .Are you ready to get off both ? If you are I would do one at a time alcohol first .How much are you drinking a day .There are risks with alcohol wd that's why I am asking . I have never had an issue with alcohol so I dont know if you can cut down until you get off or whether you just have to stop I know there are risks if you are drinking alot if you just stop.Once you have gotten of the alcohol then tackle the benzos next .They have to be tapered but it can be done .We will be here to support you all we can you can get off these .Hang in there.
avis :)

[swagger39]

Anybody else addicted to klonapin and plan on quitting? It is going to take a long time in my case and the beer ? Its a ritual. In my twisted mind I am rewarding myself for whatever crap I had to deal with that day/night, Trouble is I dont stop at a few. And even more trouble is I have a taste for the expensive stuff like guiness and corona etc. Anyone else at were Im at and dont want to be there?

[sooners181]

Klonopin is very diificult to detox cold turkey. Also there is a risk of seizure activity. It takes a long time to withdraw from benzodiazepines. Seek help through a Dr or detox. Best Wishes. Jeff

[swagger39]

I drink about 4 days out of the week , sometimes less, sometimes more and when I do its usually never less then 10 and often 12 to 14. I get a little nutty after that. Its turned my daughters against me or at least thats a big factor as there are other issues there. I did notice last week I took a big taper with benzos and went into wd. This week went back to reg dose and did not drink for 5 days. The benzos made me very tired and lazy but I been taking them for years. Some say you lose a lot of energy during alcohol wd. Maybe that is what was happening. Anyway back to the Q&A based on what ive said do you think thats a lot of alcohol? Does any of this make sense?

[swagger39]

I have no intention on ct klonopin. I felt like hell just cutting dose in half. Ihave a lot of peices of this puzzle to put together such as a good taper plan , alcohol , family problems , work etc, but cold turkey is not an option anymore. thanks.

[avisg]

With the alcohol I am not sure but we have a few member that have been cross addicted to alcohol and drugs I am going to post to one of them she will have a better idea when it comes to the achohol .I dont want to give you the wrong info .Her screen name is domniosara she is a CL to she has been off alcohol 3000 days and opiates for ALOT as well.
I did take klonopin at one point to be honest I Dont remember anything from that year unless I see it in pictures .My doctor changed me over to valium I took that for a while then got off them altogether . Is there any way to get the doctor to change you over to valium it is eisier to get off of ? If you have any other question just let me know I am here to help.
avis

[avisg]

check out this site she is one of the worlds foremost experts on benzo withdawl...
http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/bzcha02.htm

[swagger39]

OH YES many times, in fact I cant find ANY doc who will bring on the valium. They all say its too addicting....? Please dont get me started with the doc issue...I get pretty riled up. Its hard just to keep the klon script flowing. Im well aware of the advvantage of diazapam ( valium ) I experemented with it years ago and I liked it. Anyhow I have not started the taper yet and when I do it will be be a small decrease each month but I use 2mg tabs and they are small. Not sure how to divy it up down the road when it calls for smaller doses. Ive thought about crushing it into powder and evenly dividing it up sorta like they do with coke with a razor or something.

[dominosarah]

Hi......You really need to work on one thing at a time here.  Alcohol and pills are never a good mixture.  Alcohol wd's are tough but doable.  You will notice the shakes, headaches and anxiety along with being tired.  I would highly recommend a support group of some sort or an addiction specialist to help you with this.  You have alot on your plate and you need to get to the bottom of why you are numbing yourself up.  You dont have to be a prisoner to this anymore........sara

[swagger39]

Im aware of this and that is the main reason I am here. I could have drank but Im doing this instead. I dont like AA ( cliques ) and yes I should see a counsler. There are many things at the bottom of this I could write a book. Im 50 and a hasbeen and never used my potential when I had a chance. Thanks

[dominosarah]

Good for you on coming here instead of picking up a drink!!  You are not a hasbeen.....You can still use your potential to the max.  I am 49 and life is just starting for me.

[swagger39]

Gonna be hot today. Working alone in a hot factory, fans shut down etc. Then I get to come home this afternoon and the ac went out last night for our half of the building. Sure hope this dont buy me an excuse to get angry with landlord and start drinking. Im fairly confident I can keep it together. sat night is our relax in front of tv and put in a few dvds night. I guess thats out now.

[sway1]

hey man, haya doin? hope you get some relaxation in. i have to work til 10pm but meave me a message if you want. sway

[swagger39]

Wanting to help, wanting to be part of this forum but I am no expert on any drugs only my own addictions to benzos and beer. I wish I could help someone out here as I have been given much usefull advice it makes me feel like all take and no give. Ther is so much on this site about methadone but I am in the dark on that one only know it sounds like living hell. I have been on opiates if that is what diladin-vicadin- oxy is and I had no choice but to ct those and all I remember is feeling sick to my stomach for a week or so but also I use 4mg a day of klonopin so that may have smoothed out the wd.

[avisg]

If you start feeling like drinking post instead ..We will help you ...:)

[swagger39]

I dont feel like drinking but it is not night yet. I do need to enter that forum but Im not ready to have too many things going on at same time. Do the post I make here default to other forums as well or do I need to start from scratch? Also this is hard cuz my wife is wondering why Im spending so much time on the web and maybe Im up to no good. She dont drink and dont understand , and this is also a good outlet for me as I no longer have the attention span to draw or paint and I was an avid gym rat... until shoulder surgery set me back. When I get the urge to drink you will be the first to know avisg. What does that stand for anyway if you dont mind me asking? thank you again.

[jayeye]

does your wife know of your habbits.....is she aware you have a problem?

if the answer is yes then i would just explain to her why you are on the computer

i know its hard because like you said she dosent know what its like....and people who have never experianced it have no idea the pain we feel everyday even when we are on our drug of chioce.......they dont know how hard it really is

[avisg]

I would show your wife the site it will help her under stand whats going you are going threw how you want help and there is nothing wrong you are not doing anything you should not be doing .

[swagger39]

Its 5oclock somewhere , 7 in the midwest and Iam Bored. I just dont feel the need to be drunk but it is still very early and Im not up to TV either , just wanna sleep but already slept half the day away.

[swagger39]

Yes I feel like having that drink. I know Im rationalizing here but does having a few beers afew nights a week and only at night at home by myself really make me an alcoholic or does it imply I have a problem? I suppose I can only truly answer that as I know myself and my strengths and weaknesses. My number one problem is benzo addiction and how it is keeping me down , keeping me from enjoying the qualities of life that I know are out there, keeping me from me being the real me and putting a wrench in the machine of my true potential.

[jayeye]

i think you already know the answer to that

[swagger39]

i think i know the answer to that , I am in what they call in   denial , but am i really? i dont know the answer to that. I can take it or leave it , but I hate the way I feel when im without for a week or so. The benzos are a whole different story. I know I am physically and mentally unable to function without them , the sad part is they dont even give me a buzz even if i take 8mg all at once. yes i tried that a few times. IM always 1 script ahead of the doctor so i always have xtra for the day i decide to taper, but it hit me hard the reality of 1 or 2 xtra refills is not enough to taper. i should have known that as i tried it with zanax 3/4 yrs ago and almost died. i believe i would have had my mom not saved my *** by lending me the cash to get to the doc , whom i owed money to and got back on klonopin instead of zanax. I cant believe they told me in the ER to guts it out. go figure.

[swagger39]

Just a thought , do benzos even fall into this forum because i have read very little about other benzo addicts. I surely have been given good advice and feedback but am i in the right forum?