I never knew about PAWS and now am scared to death

[I_AM_GOING_TO_MAKE_IT]

Hi,
I would like to hear about peoples experience with PAWS (Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome) and does it happen to everyone, will you just be in class/work and all the sudden look like crap and have to make some wierd excuse to leave? Or is it just maybe tiredness or something, I am starting a PhD program in sep and have taken the summer off to get clean before i go, this means i only have 60 days to be well enough to do research, i thought 60 would be plenty before i came to this forumn and became educted on this. I really hope that the PAWS is not too bad and that it doesn't interfere with your life too much. I can handle low energy but need enough to at least walk campus, I also need a very clear mind, does PAWS make your head cloudy or what does it do to you guys? Any input from anyone would be tremendous. I tell you, the w/d I can do it, I am already at day 10, but years of PAWS during a PhD program is not going to be easy by any means.

[Florida_Guy737]

Thinking that you're doing better on the drugs is a path down to something bad; I believe you know this.  Yes, some people, especially students, would use drugs to get through their courses but I don't recall anyone being dependent/addicted and doing well in the long term. I have two masters degrees and I was on meds at times during the programs.  I actually found the meds made me work harder to get through the material because I would 'drift' at times and lose my concentration.

There are other ways to get focused and I agree with the others about a positive attitude, exercise, amino acids; the protein drink is a good idea.  If you can afford it, I use Monster Milk because it's loaded with protein and aminos.

Also, once you graduate and you're in the working world, do yu really want to be a slave to something that can seriously mess up your life?  Read the posts here...man of the stories are a shock to the system and something that you should want to avoid.

Guy

[gnarly_1]

HI....im a firm believer in a ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure....check out the amino acid protacal on the right hand side of the screen...there are a list of amino acids that help the brain heal....you will have a major depletion of them coming off methadone
I know I girl who swore by them and was the only exception I know of to a long drown out recovery...she detoxed in a professional center and they started her on them b/4 she left there her recovery was remarkably fast....I drink whey protein shakes....2 a day its loaded with vitamins amino acids as well as protein ...all of witch the brain needs to heal..you can pick up a 2lb can up at walmart for 15 bucks...the chocolate flavor is good and its a cheep fix...I only wish I had found this stuff sooner it seams to make a difference...the actual amino acids are better if your budget allows but I have had good results with the whey protein so give it a try...aftercare is vital to making it threw this so plug in somewhere keep up the good work  your doing great so far
good luck and God bless.....Gnarly

[jayeye]

im on day 12 and i am going thru some pretty rough stuff myself......i feel like im my mind has changed....its just not right........im doing weird things....like ocd things..over analyzing everything....dwelling counting......making the biggest deal out of the smallest thing..i feel like i might have done something long term damage.....since i was on such i high dose

is this possible....do develop mental illnesses like that......or is that part of the PAWS

and the insomnia seems like its never going away......at least im on med leave i would never be able to work like that...hope the money last and i get short term disablity

[I_AM_GOING_TO_MAKE_IT]

Thanks guys, you really give me inspiration to make it. I love that i found this forumn. So, some people get severe PAWS and some dont, I am on day 10 but i feel it still, the baths help. I hope, scratch that, I know it will get better! Thanks again for the inspiration guys, good luck.

[quadracersteve]

This is not the gospel truth by any means, my info came from an "ill-informed" councilor.  When I had gotten down to a low dose, 18mg, I got so sick I ended up in the E.R. (this is not meant to scare you, just what I was told) and when I went back to the clinic they raised me up 5mg to 23mg w/ no difference in how I felt, so up another 5mg to 28mg.  Not much better and they wouldn't go any higher till I had bloodwork,( I came back as healthy as a horse), and they would not do anything else for me so I transfered to a diff clinic, and as I was leaving my coulcilors office for the last time she asked me if she ever gave me the paper on PAWS, or Post Accute Withdrawal Syndrome, and I had every symptom.  According to her, it was because I went down too fast, (1mg every 3 days).  I detoxed off meth before and never had these symptoms, but they are w/drawals x's 10 off methadone.  I've been in the E.R., maybe 5 times in my life and 2 x's for this. The dr. said I was going through massive w/drawals and gave me 20mg of meth, BUT THE CLINIC DIDN'T RAISE MY DOSE TO MATCH WHAT THE DR. GAVE ME! Let's just say,I counciled my councilor instead of the other way around, so I really didn't get any answers except for a pc. of paper with a whole list of symptoms with a title of PAWS on top. Anyways, I'm still trying to detox.  I see my dr. this 26th, (new dr. with methadone experience) so hopefully I can get to the bottom of this. Sing w/me, "All I want for Christmas is to be sober, to be sober,lol".

[wishful1]

I am at day 63 clean. I still have days where i feel down, but i think it could be depression too. Overall im doing good, I have already finished my college (cosmetology school) im 22, but anyways i am looking for a job. It is kinda scary because i am nervous to be around people in the workplace and clients without being high, but i have to get past it. I have been really tired lately too, but everyone is diffrent. Keep a positive mind, attend meetings if you can, (they help me soooo much!) read the NA book, and you will be fine! I am in a completely diffrent place than i was 63 days ago, so just stay strong and you will be fine!

Betsy

[laurel453]

Hey, hold on a minute !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


your lifedream is now more than ever before possible and it is on your destiny, believe it ( FIRST OF ALL :)

Here comes for you the mental battle but YOU CAN DO IT :)

now, from my experience those PAWS are not as terrible as the idea you can have now after reading about them. I was also quite scared after reading the pages but as FLorida guy told you knowledge is power.... what i had at the end was some weeks where i felt a certain lack of energy ( healthy diet, exercise, aminos like ltyrosine....), my short memory was not at its best ( lots of notes , there is always a solution), some depression ( take those days as part of the process and they will pass....of course evrything will pass.. )..that was all.....it can a little bit exhausting some days, that's all if you keep your trust that will pass......And go for some type of  aftercare like therapy, meetings, whatever works for you, please, this is important)...

what i'm trying to tell you is that it is absolutely doable but you will need working hard  on it, so what ? you seem to me to commited and ready to do whatever is needed once you know it's doable, it is indeed.....Don't be scared, try always to calm down with whatever will come.... keep your life changes ( disciplined life at all costs, healthy living, no toxic relationships, help from NA meetings, therapy, counsellors) and trust that you will do it and got your degree... so what if you have to work harder and study maybe some more hours for some time ? it's doable...  ALTIUS, FORTIUS, citius  :)

[I_AM_GOING_TO_MAKE_IT]

So, PAWS is really somewhat mental and can be overcome by a positive attitude and courage, I dont' care what this devil throws at me, i am not going to give up, I just am scared about the phd program, if i don't maintain a 3.5 GPA and get at least a B in each and every class, i am out of the school, plus lose my scholarship.

Hey guys who were in acedemia when they were addicts: Did you feel that the pills made you do better at school? For some reason, i felt like superhuman and got straight A's in my undergrad and grad (all while on opiates). So i must perform EVEN BETTER in the phd program, I am hoping that my brain, pardon the misnomer, is still as willing and powerful, especially when the PAWS hit. How did anyone feel after they got back to school 60 days later and beyond and did you feel like school was much harder (and shamefully, more boring and less desirable to do) without the narcs? I am worried about my performance at school, if this was undergrad, no problem, but phd means CLEAR PROBLEM-SOLVING INTUITIVE mind. The type of education i am getting is in engineering, which means deep critical thinking all the time, we are problem solvers and R&D people, It was a huge huge huge task and accomplishment to even get accepted to the school, let alone winning the 4yr scholarship.....was it even me who accomplished this or was it the drugs making my brain smarter? I have read somewhere a long time ago that opiates actually highten the brain activity for short term use, then after long term use can cause damage to brain activity. Someone in a similar sit please provide words of encouragement, If this stupid addiction ruins my lifelong dreams.....i am tearing writing this all the sudden....i don't know if i will ever feel worth anything ever again. My family is amazed by my accomplishments but don't know about the drug use all those 8yrs, what a tarnish on all the congrats and bragging to their friends about me if they only knew. My dad has never used drugs or alcohol, so he would never understand, i even told him a few years back and his reaction was, 'just stop taking them right now, I cant understand why if you don't want to do them anymore, then why you won't just not eat them anymore'. It is not his fault, he has literally no clue what that would mean. I did tell my momma though, she has struggled with addiction for her whole life, she has been a good help but lives kinda far away. You guys are the only ones to talk to most of the time. My gf also is good but she is getting sick of sittin around with me, i cant do s**t right now. Sorry about the long posts i do, I just have so much to say and want to hear similar stories, thanks all of you guys, you guys will probably never know how many lives you have saved!

[shelliAS]

If PAWS is what I think - that initial w/d reaction (plz correct me if I am wrong), walking around campus should give you energy, not vice versa.  Also I am doing better after 8 days, much less 60, so I think you will be rocking the PhD world by the time school starts!

I hope the best for you and congrats on the PhD program!  I copped out after a MS, and couldn't take academia any more... lol...

Shelli  

[Florida_Guy737]

PAWS was real for me but I handled it through exercise and staying focused on other goals besides sobriety.  Just use the info as you see fit.  I believe knowledge is power so when you start feeling off, try to remember your body is recovering and you'll be OK.

Congrats on your doctorate program...that sounds exciting and should be more than enough to keep you focused.

Guy

[dominosarah]

Try and calm down.  The more positive you stay and work your recovery the better off you will be.  I didnt really experience PAWS as i kept an upbeat outlook on things.   Look at your screen name...that says it all!!         sara