Aa
I'm really sick right now
Today is my first day in years w/o Vicodin. I've been taking 5-6 750's a day (approx 4500mg).
I ran out and my doc won't refill early. I feel like my body is wracked with pain and a severe
"antsy" feeling all over. It's awful. IF I can survive this, can I possibly get OK in 2 days? I have to go back to work.
I ran out and my doc won't refill early. I feel like my body is wracked with pain and a severe
"antsy" feeling all over. It's awful. IF I can survive this, can I possibly get OK in 2 days? I have to go back to work.
Your story is inspirational. I really hope for you that you enjoy your travels; most that you enjoy them sober and fresh minded. Did you know that you have a gift for writing, you can put into words what you have experienced. Did you know thats a gift? You have lots of reasons to keep going, your health, ur sister, ur life, love to give love to receive. I hope you know that God does care about you and about all of us who abuse or dont abuse or just plain screw up. We live in a sinful hurtful world that messes with us and hurts us too much. But contrary to popular belief God didnt do this to us, we did. He's here for us to help us through every and any circumstance that we face. If we can realize that our circumstances do not have to control our reactions, we can live a life of love and freedom in Him. He wants to help us so we dont live in reaction to our lives. I know this is a different perspective. He wants us to have more than eternal life (though thats awesome, He said He came to give us life abundant) He loves us right where we are. He wants us to know that. I am happy for ur sobriety. God bless you. I hope you enclude Him in your recovery. I hope you read about Him in His Word. I hope you learn who He is by reading it. I know He'll help you. I havent been on these boards long, but these people here care too! God gave us His Son and He gave us each other. I hope the best for you. K
I'm on day 6 of w/d and started the L-Tyrosine yesterday. I have had more anxiety and RLS the last 2 days than previous does anyone know if it's due to the L-Tyrosine from the Thomas Recipe?
I was hoping that old famliar sense of wellbeing would be there to breath life into my dead withered limbs and mind.
It was, but only sort of.
I had a new issue, what once would satisfy me, was now fleeting, and this was worse than just any tolerance I had to adjust to in the past.
It was like running across a flaming bridge, I had to keep taking more and more oxycontin to feel normal, not just normal, to feel sane.
I could not even sleep anymore unless I was good and high, and by the time I slept 6 hours I would awaken with a terrible sense of depression, anxiety, I would get right out of bed and run to the "cookie jar" I kept full of oxycontin.
I began researching the addiction at this time, preparing myself to try to kick the drug again.
Heroinhelper.com was a priceless tool in this regard. There I learned of this "boredom" the opiate addict experiences once the worst of the physical withdrawals diminish. The most difficult part in my opinion. The Dead Zone.
I began to prepare myself mentally in preparation for quitting all the while taking massive amounts of oxycontin in comparison to the usual doses, to feel anything for more than an hour or so. I ate twenty 80 mg oxys in 3 days, and then another 15 in 2 days.
I then got another 20 and ate those in near 3 days.
The worse thing was, it got to the point where I would feel depressed even after chewing up 2-3 80s at a time.
I am no stranger to mental hardships, as a child I was clinically and severely depressed at times, as a teenager I dabbled with hallucinogens and went through several hundred psychotic break downs of one form or another. I had a mild xanax dependecy for about 8 months in high school. Always though I rediscovered living, through will, determination.
The time had come for me to throw of this disgusting stagnant yolk, for too long had I indulged myself.
On October 1st I quit cold turkey, eating my last 5 80mg oxycontin in about 5 hours time.
The withdrawals came the next morning, I thought I was prepared for them.
Oh how little did I know.
I spoke of vomiting twice the last time I went through the withdrawal period.
This time, I vomited for 36 hours, just about every hour or so. I had trash bags of vomit all over my house. I managed to drink 7up and Sprite in between vomiting episodes, wary of dehydration. I think this prevented severe health complications, looking back I should have went to the ER.
But I just sat there in the darkness, puking, out of my mind, blaming myself for all of this. My self pity gave root to anger. Pure, clean anger. How did I let my life get so out of control? I had to take responsibility for it, I had to heal.
Not only was I vomiting violently, but my mind was delirious. I managed to sleep for 30 minute windows off and on for the first three days, but I was always driven insane by half asleep, nonsensical thought processes. Amalgamations of dreams, and things I saw on the television.
So I would just surrender and go watch TV and wait. Sleeping when I became exhausted every 30 hours or so for a few hours.
What got me through it was an obscession to feel again. I would focus my mind intently on past experiences, the dim shades of what life could feel like.
Any little feeling I would sense, I would latch onto it, anylize, try to remember. On the 5th day, I started to be able to taste food again.
The bizaar thing was, by the fifth day I could find islands of experience to latch onto in between the extreme boredom. The feel of the wind on my flesh, the sound of music, oh sweet music. It seemed I had not really listened or felt anything for ages, the entire past year was synthetic, and i was finally waking up.
God what a thrill it was to work up a smile at anything, to feel more than a fleeting interest in life.
Every day was a little more improved, I kept thinking I felt good again, but every day shined a little more.
I am now on day 21.
I have had some urges while still in windows of bleakness and boredom, but I refocus those urges on an urge to one day break through this with some sense of finality.
I do find myself trying to justify using a little again, but I remember the hell I put myself through, and wait. Waiting is the key here. Even if I have to wait a year to feel that solid equlibrium I crave, I am going to.
Things are good enough, and at least they are real.
You have to think of it like the flu, make it the priority, the purpose, the world can take a number, you need to balance out again, it can take several weeks, but remember you are regrowing synaptic pathways.
You will feel again.
You have to have something to look forward to, I still have a nice amount of money thank the Maker, and am preparing to visit my sister in Vietnam next week, we are going to travel down into Cambodia as well, eventually travelling to China to the north again and taking a train across asia and Russia to western Europe. The transiberian railway, it's going to be quite an experience.
We have friends and family in Western europe, it's going to be the trip of a lifetime. I will eventually fly back hom across the Atlantic, circumnavigating the planet. If all goes as planned.
I need this, and it is really nothing when compared to the money I spent on dope.
21 days clean, thats a couple thousand in my pocket at the rate I was going.
This was the hardest thing I ever did in my life, but it had to be. Good luck in your own awakening.
It was, but only sort of.
I had a new issue, what once would satisfy me, was now fleeting, and this was worse than just any tolerance I had to adjust to in the past.
It was like running across a flaming bridge, I had to keep taking more and more oxycontin to feel normal, not just normal, to feel sane.
I could not even sleep anymore unless I was good and high, and by the time I slept 6 hours I would awaken with a terrible sense of depression, anxiety, I would get right out of bed and run to the "cookie jar" I kept full of oxycontin.
I began researching the addiction at this time, preparing myself to try to kick the drug again.
Heroinhelper.com was a priceless tool in this regard. There I learned of this "boredom" the opiate addict experiences once the worst of the physical withdrawals diminish. The most difficult part in my opinion. The Dead Zone.
I began to prepare myself mentally in preparation for quitting all the while taking massive amounts of oxycontin in comparison to the usual doses, to feel anything for more than an hour or so. I ate twenty 80 mg oxys in 3 days, and then another 15 in 2 days.
I then got another 20 and ate those in near 3 days.
The worse thing was, it got to the point where I would feel depressed even after chewing up 2-3 80s at a time.
I am no stranger to mental hardships, as a child I was clinically and severely depressed at times, as a teenager I dabbled with hallucinogens and went through several hundred psychotic break downs of one form or another. I had a mild xanax dependecy for about 8 months in high school. Always though I rediscovered living, through will, determination.
The time had come for me to throw of this disgusting stagnant yolk, for too long had I indulged myself.
On October 1st I quit cold turkey, eating my last 5 80mg oxycontin in about 5 hours time.
The withdrawals came the next morning, I thought I was prepared for them.
Oh how little did I know.
I spoke of vomiting twice the last time I went through the withdrawal period.
This time, I vomited for 36 hours, just about every hour or so. I had trash bags of vomit all over my house. I managed to drink 7up and Sprite in between vomiting episodes, wary of dehydration. I think this prevented severe health complications, looking back I should have went to the ER.
But I just sat there in the darkness, puking, out of my mind, blaming myself for all of this. My self pity gave root to anger. Pure, clean anger. How did I let my life get so out of control? I had to take responsibility for it, I had to heal.
Not only was I vomiting violently, but my mind was delirious. I managed to sleep for 30 minute windows off and on for the first three days, but I was always driven insane by half asleep, nonsensical thought processes. Amalgamations of dreams, and things I saw on the television.
So I would just surrender and go watch TV and wait. Sleeping when I became exhausted every 30 hours or so for a few hours.
What got me through it was an obscession to feel again. I would focus my mind intently on past experiences, the dim shades of what life could feel like.
Any little feeling I would sense, I would latch onto it, anylize, try to remember. On the 5th day, I started to be able to taste food again.
The bizaar thing was, by the fifth day I could find islands of experience to latch onto in between the extreme boredom. The feel of the wind on my flesh, the sound of music, oh sweet music. It seemed I had not really listened or felt anything for ages, the entire past year was synthetic, and i was finally waking up.
God what a thrill it was to work up a smile at anything, to feel more than a fleeting interest in life.
Every day was a little more improved, I kept thinking I felt good again, but every day shined a little more.
I am now on day 21.
I have had some urges while still in windows of bleakness and boredom, but I refocus those urges on an urge to one day break through this with some sense of finality.
I do find myself trying to justify using a little again, but I remember the hell I put myself through, and wait. Waiting is the key here. Even if I have to wait a year to feel that solid equlibrium I crave, I am going to.
Things are good enough, and at least they are real.
You have to think of it like the flu, make it the priority, the purpose, the world can take a number, you need to balance out again, it can take several weeks, but remember you are regrowing synaptic pathways.
You will feel again.
You have to have something to look forward to, I still have a nice amount of money thank the Maker, and am preparing to visit my sister in Vietnam next week, we are going to travel down into Cambodia as well, eventually travelling to China to the north again and taking a train across asia and Russia to western Europe. The transiberian railway, it's going to be quite an experience.
We have friends and family in Western europe, it's going to be the trip of a lifetime. I will eventually fly back hom across the Atlantic, circumnavigating the planet. If all goes as planned.
I need this, and it is really nothing when compared to the money I spent on dope.
21 days clean, thats a couple thousand in my pocket at the rate I was going.
This was the hardest thing I ever did in my life, but it had to be. Good luck in your own awakening.
I started becoming a daily user at that point.
That was about 8 months ago now.
My supply would run out at times,...
The withdrawals began as just stiff joints, boredom, and watery bowels.
I did not even notice them at first, I would often use daily for 3 weeks and then not be able to score any for a week or so.
But everytime I went through the withdrawals, the discomfort increased little by little.
Let's fast forward to the present situation.
This past year has just been a big blur in some ways, I knew it was a bad habit, but I believed I could stop if it became too much in my life. Excuses and justifications, all of it.
The last 5 months I began using more than ever before, what was an 80mg a day became 2-3.
I finally decided I needed to quit the first week of September 07, I had squandered about 20-30 thousand dollars on oxycontin and opiates, spending a hundred dollars or more a day at times.
I decided I would stop when I ran out then. And I tried.
I prepared for the withdrawals, and they soon were upon me.
I went into the now familiar black sickness that comes, the crawling ansty flesh, the sore muscles, the depression, the uncontrollable diahrea, headache, insomnia, unbearable urges to claw out of my skin and get high, and this time something new happened, I vomited twice the second day.
I had never vomited before from withdrawals.
I tried using 8 mg codeine 500 mg paracetemal tablets to wean myself, and some xanax, but the paracetemal ( Acetometaphen) was extremely high dose and I could not take enough without risking overdose to any real extent. I still pushed it to dangerous limits.
Anyways, THE WORST PART OF THE WITHDRAWAL PROCESS was soon upon me, and I was not prepared for it at all.
After I endured 3-4 days the physical withdrawals were greatly weakened, but I found the world I was waiting to see again had turned black and white.
I was unable to feel, worse than numb, it was the most overwhelming sense of boredom I had ever experienced.
I could not stop thinking about picking up the phone and getting some more oxycontin just to be able to feel the world again, to feel anything.
I could not eat or drink without forcing myself to. I just sat and changed the channel on the TV for hours, trying to endure it.
On the 6th day, I decided life was no longer worth living without the drugs if I could not feel it again without them. So I called my dealer and got some more.
That was about 8 months ago now.
My supply would run out at times,...
The withdrawals began as just stiff joints, boredom, and watery bowels.
I did not even notice them at first, I would often use daily for 3 weeks and then not be able to score any for a week or so.
But everytime I went through the withdrawals, the discomfort increased little by little.
Let's fast forward to the present situation.
This past year has just been a big blur in some ways, I knew it was a bad habit, but I believed I could stop if it became too much in my life. Excuses and justifications, all of it.
The last 5 months I began using more than ever before, what was an 80mg a day became 2-3.
I finally decided I needed to quit the first week of September 07, I had squandered about 20-30 thousand dollars on oxycontin and opiates, spending a hundred dollars or more a day at times.
I decided I would stop when I ran out then. And I tried.
I prepared for the withdrawals, and they soon were upon me.
I went into the now familiar black sickness that comes, the crawling ansty flesh, the sore muscles, the depression, the uncontrollable diahrea, headache, insomnia, unbearable urges to claw out of my skin and get high, and this time something new happened, I vomited twice the second day.
I had never vomited before from withdrawals.
I tried using 8 mg codeine 500 mg paracetemal tablets to wean myself, and some xanax, but the paracetemal ( Acetometaphen) was extremely high dose and I could not take enough without risking overdose to any real extent. I still pushed it to dangerous limits.
Anyways, THE WORST PART OF THE WITHDRAWAL PROCESS was soon upon me, and I was not prepared for it at all.
After I endured 3-4 days the physical withdrawals were greatly weakened, but I found the world I was waiting to see again had turned black and white.
I was unable to feel, worse than numb, it was the most overwhelming sense of boredom I had ever experienced.
I could not stop thinking about picking up the phone and getting some more oxycontin just to be able to feel the world again, to feel anything.
I could not eat or drink without forcing myself to. I just sat and changed the channel on the TV for hours, trying to endure it.
On the 6th day, I decided life was no longer worth living without the drugs if I could not feel it again without them. So I called my dealer and got some more.
You need to understand that feeling of amotivated ****, bleak boredom, it is a neural chemical thing.
Your brain is not used to producing endorphins, the vicodin grew new synaptic pathways in your brain to access your endorphins, now you need to grow them back and readjust. Endorphins provide you with a natural sense of well being, of equilibrium and sanity.
Long story here, but I need to express myself, get somethings out in the open to look at from other angles.
I used opiates recreationally off and on for years, started with Lortabs/Hydrocodone.
It never became a bad habit, I could stop taking them at anytime, I would grow bored of them easily.
Life was changed forever last year however, my mother died with no real warning, in my arms. Not something any 25 year old should go through.
A few months before her death, opiates had started to become a bad habit for me. My mother was a chronic pain patient, and we needed money, so I would sell them. We were making thousands a month.
I started taking a few for myself when I sold them. Taking little chunks of it whenever I felt bored, every other day or so.
I quickly grew dependant upon it in social situations. Any new experience I had was greatly enhanced by opiates, roadtrips, video games, anything. So I started using them more and more whenever I did things like that.
Through that though, I still maintained a high regard for being clear headed, a true love of unmolested reality. I have lost many friends to addiction over the years, I always thought my will was too strong to end up an addict as well. For a few months I used them off and on, becoming aware that it was a habit that had to end soon, but I just kept right along waiting for something to signal the time to stop.
Then my mother died.
I found myself with hundreds of oxycontin and lortab she was prescribed for chronic pain.
It was a godsend at first, a true Deus Ex Machina. What was psychotic emptiness and loss, became bearable and somewhat acceptable with that safe high. I took it, and took it, sometimes, going 24 hours without it just to make sure I was not getting addicted, but always returning to it.
I was still selling it for money to friends, I had no job and the pills seemed like they would last forever. But I soon learned that was not so. After a month I sold most of them thinking it would be the best for me.
I then went through about 20 something days of soberiety, after about 90 days of increased habitual use.
20 days of boredom. The world just paled in comparison to that Golden Feeling, that enthusiasm the opiates offered. But it was just mild boredom in comparison to the monster I created.
I had never paid for oxycontin, and I refused to spend $40 on something I had always gotten for free. At first,...
Then a friend offered me some for free, and I began to justify buying it once a week, here and there.
At this time I got a substantial amount of money from my mother's Life Insurance policy.
I began to justify buying it more and more, but hit a dead end in my supply after a couple months and stopped for a few weeks altogether. No physical withdrawals yet but stiffness.
Then an old friend showed up, selling me the oxycontins he was prescribed for extremely low cost, sometimes $15 for an 80mg, and some for free when I would buy 20 or so pills at a time.
I was in plunged into the warm waters of heaven, I had a magical button I could press that not only made life bearable again, but made life fantastic.
Your brain is not used to producing endorphins, the vicodin grew new synaptic pathways in your brain to access your endorphins, now you need to grow them back and readjust. Endorphins provide you with a natural sense of well being, of equilibrium and sanity.
Long story here, but I need to express myself, get somethings out in the open to look at from other angles.
I used opiates recreationally off and on for years, started with Lortabs/Hydrocodone.
It never became a bad habit, I could stop taking them at anytime, I would grow bored of them easily.
Life was changed forever last year however, my mother died with no real warning, in my arms. Not something any 25 year old should go through.
A few months before her death, opiates had started to become a bad habit for me. My mother was a chronic pain patient, and we needed money, so I would sell them. We were making thousands a month.
I started taking a few for myself when I sold them. Taking little chunks of it whenever I felt bored, every other day or so.
I quickly grew dependant upon it in social situations. Any new experience I had was greatly enhanced by opiates, roadtrips, video games, anything. So I started using them more and more whenever I did things like that.
Through that though, I still maintained a high regard for being clear headed, a true love of unmolested reality. I have lost many friends to addiction over the years, I always thought my will was too strong to end up an addict as well. For a few months I used them off and on, becoming aware that it was a habit that had to end soon, but I just kept right along waiting for something to signal the time to stop.
Then my mother died.
I found myself with hundreds of oxycontin and lortab she was prescribed for chronic pain.
It was a godsend at first, a true Deus Ex Machina. What was psychotic emptiness and loss, became bearable and somewhat acceptable with that safe high. I took it, and took it, sometimes, going 24 hours without it just to make sure I was not getting addicted, but always returning to it.
I was still selling it for money to friends, I had no job and the pills seemed like they would last forever. But I soon learned that was not so. After a month I sold most of them thinking it would be the best for me.
I then went through about 20 something days of soberiety, after about 90 days of increased habitual use.
20 days of boredom. The world just paled in comparison to that Golden Feeling, that enthusiasm the opiates offered. But it was just mild boredom in comparison to the monster I created.
I had never paid for oxycontin, and I refused to spend $40 on something I had always gotten for free. At first,...
Then a friend offered me some for free, and I began to justify buying it once a week, here and there.
At this time I got a substantial amount of money from my mother's Life Insurance policy.
I began to justify buying it more and more, but hit a dead end in my supply after a couple months and stopped for a few weeks altogether. No physical withdrawals yet but stiffness.
Then an old friend showed up, selling me the oxycontins he was prescribed for extremely low cost, sometimes $15 for an 80mg, and some for free when I would buy 20 or so pills at a time.
I was in plunged into the warm waters of heaven, I had a magical button I could press that not only made life bearable again, but made life fantastic.
You will feel better hun..that's a promise! Just...please...DON'T give up!
Is there a way that you can take one more night off of work? Maybe if you stayed home and pampered yourself, i.e. long, hot baths, etc., you may have a better outlook for tomorrow?
It is always a little slow on Sunday's around here, but keep on talking. It helps, doesn't it?
You hang in there.
Is there a way that you can take one more night off of work? Maybe if you stayed home and pampered yourself, i.e. long, hot baths, etc., you may have a better outlook for tomorrow?
It is always a little slow on Sunday's around here, but keep on talking. It helps, doesn't it?
You hang in there.
Whew. Tough love, huh?
I do have an appointment with my regular doc 11/1. She has been on vacation (what's a vacation?)...her sub told me to take ibuprofen. Maybe by 11/1, I'll have a better mindset. Maybe my body will feel better and I'll have a better attitude about life. Today, I could care less if there's a tomorrow....and that's the truth. But I'll go to work tonight and get through this day by day.
I said it before. You guys are all I have. Thank you all.
I do have an appointment with my regular doc 11/1. She has been on vacation (what's a vacation?)...her sub told me to take ibuprofen. Maybe by 11/1, I'll have a better mindset. Maybe my body will feel better and I'll have a better attitude about life. Today, I could care less if there's a tomorrow....and that's the truth. But I'll go to work tonight and get through this day by day.
I said it before. You guys are all I have. Thank you all.
Well, you can get the refill next week...but then what??? Will you be back crying in two weeks when it runs out early??
I said that to show you how ridiculous that sounds.
First off, you have a script for the meds, right? Why can't you call that doctor? If you are really, really committed to getting clean and staying that way, then you are going to have to tell that doctor what is going on so that you can't get any more scripts from him/her. So, you should call and get honest with the doctor. He can prescribe the clonidine, and whatever else you will need to get through this.
Your workplace will not find out because of the privacy laws. The only way they will find out is if you continue to abuse the pills and it becomes obvious..which it will.
If I sound a little harsh? I am. You have a "I'm giving up..this is too hard" sound when you post. I don't want you to give up.
You have friends here lady..but you have to make the choice to get clean and stay clean. Look at all the people who have posted to you and encouraged you. That's what I call support.
I hope you make that call tomorrow. I'll say a prayer for you.
I said that to show you how ridiculous that sounds.
First off, you have a script for the meds, right? Why can't you call that doctor? If you are really, really committed to getting clean and staying that way, then you are going to have to tell that doctor what is going on so that you can't get any more scripts from him/her. So, you should call and get honest with the doctor. He can prescribe the clonidine, and whatever else you will need to get through this.
Your workplace will not find out because of the privacy laws. The only way they will find out is if you continue to abuse the pills and it becomes obvious..which it will.
If I sound a little harsh? I am. You have a "I'm giving up..this is too hard" sound when you post. I don't want you to give up.
You have friends here lady..but you have to make the choice to get clean and stay clean. Look at all the people who have posted to you and encouraged you. That's what I call support.
I hope you make that call tomorrow. I'll say a prayer for you.
I can't get clonidine or valium...I don't know how. Do I go to just any doctor and say I'm an addict? This is such a humiliating and dreadful thing. Especially living all alone. No-one to talk to. No family, no friends...well, no-one who knows of my problem. What kind of doctor do I try to see? And what do I tell that person who wants to know what my problem is before she makes the appointment? The things my mind worries about. And will my workplace find out, maybe through insurance? Sure seems easier just to get a refill next week. Sigh.
I keep thinking I'm going to feel OK tomorrow....like if I really had the flu. You say you're in the 5th week now. What are you feeling? Were you Vicodin addicted? I'm so weak and miserable. I'm supposed to go to work tonight...but I might call off again. I could lose my job...but how do I work like this? I'm trying the Thomas Recipe...but that's no overnight fix, either.
Is this weakness and antsy and just plain (insert bad word here) feeling going to last for WEEKS?
Just for taking darn painpills?
Is this weakness and antsy and just plain (insert bad word here) feeling going to last for WEEKS?
Just for taking darn painpills?
Do not beat yourself up...your brain/addiction is wanting you to do that just to cave in and go back to where you were. OK you had a minor setback and took two to help lessen your w/d's. I went cold turkey and nevr looked back becauswe i did not want to extend this horrible process at all. i wanted to get through it soon as possible and if you take just one more you are going to spead it out longer. Now some people have spoken about tapering down and in essense you did that....just do not take anymore and as KYJOBR said cancel any and all scripts...this little pills are very strong and have a way to creep back into your life unless you make a clean and total break away from them.IS IT HARD? heck yes but you can and will get through this. I used the message board as a day by day planner as what to expect each day.I never wrote on it for my first three weeks of withdrawl(on end of 4th week and begging of 5th now). Just by knowing what others have been through and what i was to kind of expect(since we are all different and w/d's will vary slightly) i was able to get a grip on the day and just deal with it. It was hard as heck as i stated earlier adn as we all know but at least i knew i was not losing my mind and/or freaking out. Also know that as each day went by i was one day closer to it all being over was awesome and a huge motivation to keep going. USE IT TO YOUR ADVANTAGE..Just like when we all ran out or low on our supplies we would prepare ourselves to go on that "hunt" to find some and did just about anything to get them .....just "FLIP IT" and use that same energy and mind power to stay the course of not taking just one because as each day goes by you are going to be one day closer to never needing and or wanting those sick things again!!! good luck to all of us!!
Thank you for your concerns and advice. I did call off tonight. Do you think I totally messed up by taking those 2 7.5's? (4 hours apart, at least). Am I having to start this awfulness from today instead of 3 days ago?
Nina you must make your detox priority. I know it is hard but if you need to call in sick to work do it.If you had a horrible flu with fever you couldnt go to work think of it that way. About day 4 you will start getting a little energy back, but it comes back gradually. Make detox the most important thing in your life. It's the only way. Miss weddings, family functions, work anything it takes. Pretend you do have the flu. Everything else in the world can wait. You will feel so much better when its over. Good Luck to you. You are number one right now.
Nina I was taking Norco 10mg for 3 years and quit. It was hell but the worst of the worst was over by the 3rd day. The 4th day I felt much better. It still took me about 3 months to feel totally normal again though.
Day 4 or should I say NIGHT 4, not feeling so great this evening; cold chills and anxiety again! When will this end!?!
I had my ankle rebuild in 1999 and slowly the pain became to much.Just had ankle fusion surgery two weeks ago to remove the pain (and mobility) because the pain meds were being increased to levels of oxycontin 140 mg per 24 hours and 10 to 30 mgs of IR, I have been on this combo for two plus years and want to get off these med now. Should I go cold turkey ? I need a plan. I have never abused this med but the increases were quite alarming as I started with 40 mg per 24 hrs.
Please advise,this is my first visit,
Please advise,this is my first visit,
I know sorry :( I posted on the other one and didn't know I had responses and posted here too cuz I'mjus panicked. Thanks for all the responses so far...And I'm sure I'll be back sunday night when I'm sick and can't sleep. Thank God I found this msg board...
did you mean to post here? You've got another post going on for the same thing so maybe this one an error? Just want to make sure you're getting the answers you need.
I know you're scared and I'm very sorry you are going through this. I was the one that asked if you were going to refill. I asked that because you mentioned in your first post that your doctor wouldn't refill early. That means to me that you've got one coming up. You MUST cancel that now or you will slip.
You've got us and yourself. You are stronger than you think you are. Someday you will look back at this when you've got 1 year clean and realize how far you've come and how much happier you are. Just close your eyes and imagine that day. 1 year will pass no matter what you do so do you want to be clean or in the same old place if not worse?
You've got us and yourself. You are stronger than you think you are. Someday you will look back at this when you've got 1 year clean and realize how far you've come and how much happier you are. Just close your eyes and imagine that day. 1 year will pass no matter what you do so do you want to be clean or in the same old place if not worse?
I'm still having cold chills today anybody now how long this will last? I'm trying so hard to overcome these w/d's. I feel good for a while but then mild anxiety, and cold chills creep up again. I so badly wanted to be over this today!
Ok I"m going monday to get the sub. However I have to go thru withdrawal first. terrifed I know what it's like. question: I have valiums - is it safe to take them during withdrawal and still be able to get on the sub?
This is really scarey, isn't it? How are you doing? I actually went to work today (night...I work nights). I hurt so damn bad, and was shakey and spacey. I was so bad that my boss worried about me. I warned him my flu was so bad, I might be calling in tonight. But the worst thing is....I went to a fellow employee who I know had Vicodin and she gave me 2 7.5's. Yes, I took them. Wow. I am an addict. I never knew. I could barely stand up, though. It's my back and knee that started this ****.
Someone said on this site "are you going to refill the next one"? Am I?????? I'm totally alone. I have no-one to help me and give me faith....except all these people online. You are all amazing. I'm gonna read everyday. I know I WANT to be free of this constant "high"....actually, such a "low"...but I'm frightened.
Someone said on this site "are you going to refill the next one"? Am I?????? I'm totally alone. I have no-one to help me and give me faith....except all these people online. You are all amazing. I'm gonna read everyday. I know I WANT to be free of this constant "high"....actually, such a "low"...but I'm frightened.
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