Oxy/Hydro-codone withdrawals...

[Hollowbody]

Hello everyone, I've been sitting reading the posts after stumbling to this site for about an hour, its brought me much hope and i've immediately just become a member.  Anyways, I've been taking hydrocodone for about a year and half, everyday.  Recently, in the past 3 months, I've upped myself to oxycodone as well (roxicodone), and now pretty much focus just on taking/getting the oxy.  Before i got to the oxy, i was taking bw 15-20 norcos a day, and now, after taking the oxys, norcos literally only give me my "high" in the morning, if any high at all.  I've wanted to quit for at least six months now, but have failed, or barely even attempted.  I never thought i would be in this position... ive lost friends, thrown away valuable relationships, spent money i don't have, and have become a liar.  When i have my rare moments of clarity is when i reflect and realize this, and i know its true (but it doesn't happen often bc i usually make sure to be fixed all day, numbed emotions).  Is it possible to get through the withdrawal period without an anti opiate like suboxone?  I am 23, a full time student almost about to graduate, and my life has been an f-ing lie and i cant take it anymore.  I am afraid i cant afford to pay for the suboxone or any treatment and cant get my parents involved, for my mom would be heartbroken and id rather die who i am unable to get out of this than break her heart with this.  Somebody, anybody... can you please give me advice?

To be specific, id really like to know the following:
- how long would a physical withdrawal period be for someone like me, a year and half in (everyday) once at 20 norcos a day and now about 8 30mg oxys a day.....?
-my body hurts SO BAD when i wake up, say if i got good sleep and took my dose before i slept... i find this feeling impossible to cope with.  does this mean i NEED suboxone?
-will i ever be truly happy again?  and im not talking about spirituality, even though i am a christian by faith, but literally.. will my brain ever produce an efficient (not sufficient) amount of seratonin or whatever i have messed up by my drug addictions?

thank you for reading this.  I am very desperate, and im very seroius about quiting.  I have a bright future in front of me if i can just get off this sh*t.  My parents have paid for me to go to a prestigous catholic university in san diego and im about to receive a ba in business administration... i feel very guilty for what i have been doing considering all the lying and investment my loving family has put in to me.  Please help.

[outofmymind82]

I dont know your parents but I am a mother and I know that no matter what my child was going through I would want him/her to reach out to me and be there for them. I would acctually be really hurt if they were going through something so horrible and they didnt trust me enough to share it with me and let me help. I assume your mother is the same. Having said that, I know why you dont want to tell her. My mother is my BEST friend and she went through the whole addiction process and knowing that....I STILL have trouble telling her about it! The comment someone else said above about are you afraid they will take your pills away? Of course you are! I would be!! I can tell you however...if I had someone to come take my pills away and make sure I never had another one I would be sooo happy and appriecative!!! I would HATE them at first but look at how it could turn out...you stay on them and dont get help and most likely ruin your life...or...you tell your parents or someone you can trust and get help!!! I dont think this is something you should do alone!! You should get help from somewhere!!

My mom was taking more pills then you and she tried cold turkey, it didnt work for her, she almost died from her blood pressure getting so high and she just couldnt take it. she is also a big baby when it comes to pain though and I think someone that is generally a tougher person could make it through it without other meds. She is currently on Suboxone and Im not likeing how it is turning out. She CANT sleep, they keep her awake no matter what she does. so now she is like a walking zombie! She gets up to go to the bathroom or something simple and she will fall asleep in mid step and fall over and bust her head on something. She falls asleep at the wheel when driving her car and her legs are sooooo swollen that you cant even tell they are legs anymore! The Suboxone are not doing good for her in that aspect at all!! On the other hand, they DID get her through the w/d process without a single w/d symptom at all!!!! As soon as she put one in her mouth she was fine, got up and was cleaning house and happy and no bad feelings what-so-ever!! I think if she would have went on a 21 day soboxone treatment she would have been fine but she has been on them for 2 months now and its tearing her up!!! She needs to get off them asap!!

I dont know if all this helps...just my own personal thoughts and observations!
I wish you good luck and would really like to hear how you are doing now!!

~*Missy*~

[Vexel]

I was in the same position you are in, got addicted to a med for what started out to be lower back and hip pain. At first I didn't like it, then slowly got to taking more and more. I took Lortab 10's 4-5x a day for 2 years, sometimes more on the weekends, never less. After 2 years I lost my insurance and had to quit CT! It was the WORST feeling I've ever been through in my entire life. Runny nose, shakes, sweats, no sleep, then feeling really sore, couldn't get interested in anything. At one point I just laid in bed curled up in the fetal position watching Emily Rose on the DVD player over and over for 3 days. I felt like she looked at one point all twisted on the floor in her dorm room. The I started taking Tylenol Arthritis strength 2-3x a day 3-4 pills at a time just to cut the edge off the withdrawals. That seemed to help a good bit. After a week I felt better, after 2 weeks I felt like I could start talking to others about my experience. After 2 months I forgot all about it and swore I would never do that again.

Well... 2 years later I got back on them, now I'm taking 2x Percocet 10's a day and 4x Lortab 10's a day and have been again for 2 years now and kicking myself because I want to get off them again but know what I'm about to go through, and I'm not looking forward to it. Before I didn't have school or a job, now I have both and can't imagine going through that again needing to work.

Good luck to you and hope you get through it.

[firefish]

I am both a recovering addict and a parent with grown children.  It would break my heart if I found out that at any time during my kid's lives they were hurting and did not come to me for help.  I mean it.  

I went through withdrawals twice.  It *****, it is miserable, , and if I thought even for a second that one of my kids was going through the same thing I'd travel to wherever they were and help them in any way.

Yeah, there may be angst at first, maybe even a little rage, but you are their child and they will want to help.

Also, you need to ask yourself, and answer honestly, are you REALLY afraid of upsetting them, or are you afraid of them taking away your pills?  And we don't need to know the answer  -   YOU do.

[Ella789]

Please know that I think these posts to you are truly a blessing like you said.  I am glad jw272 re-posted his post as it got lost in the old post.  It was such an inspiration to my heart and I am sure many others are given hope too as I was!    All these guys on here, includeing me, have been where you are emotionaly. We do understand.  Post often, and wishing a speedy detox for you!

Ella

[Hollowbody]

Holy ****, I'm sitting in class reading this on my phone and I'm holding back tears.  Thank you everyone, I am so happy to have the advice from everyone here and the inbox messages - it's such a blessing.  I need to get back to what im doing right now, but I'll be back on the post thread around 1230-1 when I'm out- it's very imp to me!  Thanks so much, I really feel like I just was blessed with a group of friends that actually care.  It's amazing.  Be back later.

[worried878]

u can get clean..at 240 mgs it would be tough to go ct but people do it all the time..if u could get someone to hold ur pills and taper down to 100 mgs a day/even 120 mgs/it would be easier to jump off..or at 23 u could just ct it where u r at but it would be at least a week of feeling preety bad...day 4 is often the worst but everyone is different..if it were me i would try to taper down then go ct.there is always sub and people use it either short or long trm depending on their goals...less than 21 days at a small dose and many do not get addicted.if u stay on it for a while u will have wds tho as a rule..however u do it u need to find a meeting near u..keep posting

[Kleo38]

I sent you a private message,look in your inbox .

[jw272]

well i am here to tell all who do not posses the power of struggle, i have been taking hard narcotics for 6 1/2 years those drugs made me do horrible things and things i am not proud of but i stand here today sober and clean and no more withdrawl feelings. i started out playing semi pro football and got injured with a spinal cord concussion and 2 lower herniated discs so that means yes i got prescribed oxycontin,vicodin,percocet,darvocet,roxycet,loritab,and methadone. and please anyone who is thinking about going to a detox place, please think twice about it. if you want them to fill your body with horrible drugs just to get you hooked on something else, its not worth it. there is no hope in clinics. i see doctors as drug dealers the more you come in the more they get payed especially right now in this economy. people i have taken oxycontin 80 mg 9 times a day, and 10 mg of percocet and vicodin 15 times a day, i was almost a freakin vegitable.
look plain and simple you are the one in control of your life narcotics are the devils drug, my withdrawls lasted almost a full year till my body got back to normal, the hard withdrawls where the famous feeling like a dead fish flopping outside of the water, cold chills, shaking badly after i woke up, couldent or dident want to move at all, throwing up for no reason, peeeing out of my rear end, pure hell..and like i said take control of your life and just stop, the reason your body is doing the withdrawls is because its doing its best to get back to its "a" game. what helped me was my strong will to survive i did this to myself and now i had to clean myself....there is hope pray to god or whatever you believe in. you do not need depression meds you do not need more drugs, shut up sit down and survive. i am clean now for almost 2 years now i have no cravings i do not want that again....point blank if my arm gets shot off, just pass me the tequila and a couple of advil

[methadonian]

Hollow is what I used to say i feel like when a doc or counsellor would ask what I felt like so I really Know where you are coming from....I used heroin for 12years and have been on methadone for 18 years... I have had a habit on oxys up to 1200mg a day and have also been addicted to morphine.... Regarding withdrawals Heroin comes on Quick and lasts about 3 weeks... Morphine is horrible comes on quick is very intense but you can get over it in about 10days.... Methadone is Insidious I jumped off cold turkey 150mg and lasted 56 days before I had to go back on done as you just keep getting worse daily and no sleep at all... DONT GO ON DONE! Oxys are pretty intense to start off but if you can get some sleepers for a week or two the mindset you are in you can win as it doesnt last too long... For me it is the sleep or lack of that makes it hard... The first 3 days you will hate it but hang in there it does get better... If you need any advice or some one to talk to let me Know... You Can and will DO IT

[Totsie59]

First of all..Your parents love YOU. They had rather be a little heartbroken...than have you on drugs or worse dead...tell them...I am a mother of a former drug addict...I would rather know..Hon, if you are ready reach out for your Mom and Dad...let them hold you really tight...I was on hydro for about a yr...the worst part of the wds is the 1st wk..but it is different for everyone...I went cold turkey..I am 60 days clean, and I have never felt better...it just keep getting better..You sound like you have alot going for you...grab live with both hands and hold on tight...You can do this...keep posting..I am so glad you found this forum...good luck