Pain pill addiction leaving me hopeless

[hope2121]

So I'm a 26 year old female and I have been struggling with painpill for a year and a half now. It started off by my neck and back constantly hurting so I went to a specialist they told me I had fibermialgia and sciatic nerve pain and disc issues..... so my doctor decided to put me on oxycodone  10's 2 times daily... but after 3-4 months what two pills were doing weren't helping anymore so I started taking more and more till finally I would take any where from 6-8 oxycodone 10's a day. now it's a year later and I'm scared to come off which I've tried to before but it never seems to quit I'm scared my brain won't go back ronnoail I feel hopeless and sad I even feel suicidal at times because I got so addicted to these one they helped my pain and two I didn't have to feel the saddness I did before. Please help me get through this... will my brain ever be normal? Will I ever be happy and have normal emotions like I used to ? And how long does withdrawal usiseally last in what I was taking and for how long? Please help I'm not in a good place I feel like.

[spider6]

Hey there hope, I'm glad you found your way here....it's a great place to start.  You got some perfect advice from your new friend Lesa .......I agree with everything she says....the withdrawal is the easy part friend......the work starts afterward......doing this for a year is nothing to sneeze at but still its not long enough where I'd think it would take you a great deal of time to "recover" your brain. But it WILL recover, you will have it back.  It's normal to feel depressed after stopping opiates.....this will just take time to get over.  Good news is that you can do tons of stuff to help speed that along.

....eating good clean live foods (fruits and veggies), tons of water, tons of water, keep moving if you can, keeping busy and exercise are huge help, keep your "crappy" thoughts at bay.....keep replacing them with positve ones and telling yourself "this will pass"......you'll hate it but time is your friend......

....others recommend supplements, I used to as well but now I'm not so sure that "one size fits all".  You are best to go see your practitioner and have all your hormone and mineral levels etc checked and take it from there.  I will say that the Epsom salt baths are awesome and do help with the restless legs and just overall horribleness of the withdrawal.

Throw away what you've got left there and start fresh, you are way too young to have this devil dragging you down and robbing you of your future,........cuz believe me when I say....IT WILL.

Keep posting here and updating how you feel , others will comment and come support....You can do this.....promise.

hugs and hope. :0}

[SkyMommy2017]

There is hope I'm praying for you. One day at a time. That's all We can do as addicts. Pray Jesus is they key and also attend meetings that also helps Godwell. I will pray for you . god bless

[hope2121]

What if I never get back to normal, normal thinking normal happiness normal anything I just feel like giving it and taking one

[10356]

That is your Addiction speaking Those opiates want to keep you chained to them.. They are robbing you of who you are, of your Peace of your Relationships They cause us to feel alone The more alone we feel the more we need them. Our addiction only leads to Jail Institutions and Death. Your desire to get off them has to be stronger then your addiction. Get rid of any pills you have if you are trying to quit They will call you to take more. It is never ending till we die.

[10356]

Good Morning Hope. Welcome to the forum. You will go back to normal with 1 exception. You are now a addict. Once we cross over to addiction we are forever a addict. The only way this will change your life is the Management. We have to Manage our Disease. We manage it thru AA NA Counseling a Addiction Specialist Any our All, But we need Support and a Conscious effort on your part to stay off the drugs. Once we abuse them we will forever abuse them. Those that Need them for Pain usually have to turn them over to someone else to hold. As far as the wd It takes about a week. then a few more to clear up loose ends. It is not fun but it is doable. Just about everyone here has gone thru the wd more then once. Being honest with our loved ones is essential as support is everything.. The biggest thing with the wd is the No seep for awhile and the restless leg I think but we are all different.. I'm here Hope if you would like to talk. lesa