Please read and answer

[Mioster]

Hello everybody, my name is Michael. I have been taking about 50-60mg of Hydro's/day for the last two years. On April 15, I took my last pill. My question is about all kinds of WD symptoms. I am having muscle twitches, headaches, and sometimes rapid or pounding heartbeat, mostly in the middle of the night. Also, anxiety is getting the best of me. I do not have cravings for the stuff, but physicaly and mentaly, I am not nearly OK.
Muscle problems and heart is particularly bothersome. Please share if you or someone you know had these.
Thanks a lot for your help.
Michael.

[tex3]

LG -- I'm not sure of the mgs for each med. I threw everything away when I was done with them. From what you posted, it sounds like you were on a very similar regimen. However, I think the clonidine would really help you. It helped me with the "heebie jeebies." I still have some of that left, and it is .1 mg. The phenobarb is similar to Xanax. The Lomotil is similar to the Bentyl or Robinol. I think you could use a muscle relaxant; I took that (Zanaflex) and stomach med longer than any of the other stuff.
As for eating, you have to try. I detoxed at home for the worst of it, and didn't eat for about 4 days, except a bite here and there. I have three kids, and this was really tough. My husband was here, but not a great help, although he did try. I hated my kids seeing me like that. I started tapering on a Saturday, took a very reduced dose on Sunday, went to my doctor on Monday and got the cocktail. Then I took that through the next Saturday. On Monday morning (a week after it all started) my mother came to pick me up. I was doing better by then but was very weak, wasn't eating, was crying all the time. The first day at her house (I was off the cocktail except for the stomach meds  and occasional Zanaflex, which knocked me out) she forced me to eat some soup. Just a little, but I started to feel better. I slept a lot that day. On Tuesday she made me get out of bed. I got stronger every day from that point. We went out to eat on Wednesday, first time I was really out of the house. That day the migraines started. I got them daily until this week, a month later. I took Imitrex, aspirin, Advil. I felt like **** as far as the headaches went, but gradually the depression has lifted. I'm still getting some headaches, but not nearly as bad. I almost overdosed on aspirin one day, it was so awful.
Looking back, I realize how bad things were and how far I've come. I'm 5 weeks clean now. But during my detox I was also recovering from surgery and dealing with surgical menopause. I probably overdid it and should have tapered longer, as my doctor recommended, but I wanted off the drugs ASAP. I'm glad I did it. I haven't made a meeting yet at all; this forum has been my therapy, and it's been great. Physically, I feel normal now. The cravings just hit me last week, and I'm dealing with that. But when I look at how I felt a month ago, I realize that cravings are nothing compared to W/Ds. Mine was pretty bad, but as I've been told it's because W/Ds get worse each time. I did two "official" detoxes (one inpatient) but went through W/Ds many time when I ran out of meds. Those only lasted a day or so, as I would quickly beg or borrow more pills. But they had a serious effect on me.
Sorry this was so long, but I wanted to give you an idea of how my recovery has progressed. It is very tough to be a mom and go through this. You don't have the luxury of focusing fully on your detox or recovery, as your babies need you so much. But as my mom so wisely said, I couldn't be the mom I needed to be when I was in such bad shape. I balanced things as well as I could. Now I play basketball with my girls, watch movies, just have fun. I'm a much, much better mom. I was very lucky that my own mother took care of me at the end, but I did go through the first week of detox basically alone, as my husband was really not here. My house was a disaster at the end of it; I mean truly disgusting. I paid my mom-in-law to clean one day.
I hope you are well. Please let me know how you are doing. You can email me if you like, at ***@****. tracy

[Lostgirl]

The codience ran out in my house on May 1st.  5/2 I thought I was going to dye and couldn't stop crying.  I called NA and a nice lady gave me a regime of Xanax (anxiety) and andidepressant and Lomotil Stomach cramps and diarrhea).  She had me take .50 Xanax every 4 hrs the first day, and every six hrs the second.  I ddin't even need to take it that much the second day.  Now it is .25 same thing for two days.  I refused inpatient as I am a single parent. Last time I had to go to the hospital (not related) my daughter was 8 and is still not past it.  Their father lives in another state and my mother was out of town. I feel better physically. Not as weepy or anxiety ridden,but still have chills, can't eat, diarrhea.

I live in ABQ, NM and did not see a meeting for professionals or related.  Had to laugh! NA has same answering service!  Not sure who to contact to find out.  

As for the "cocktail"  do you know the mgs of each supplement?

Thanks,
LostGirl

[Lostgirl]

If you don't mind telling what was the "cocktail" that the doc gave you.  I too, went cold turkey.  I didn't not have the luxary of getting to flush 80 tabs down the toilet.  Which is actually a good thing!  I would have just kept on talking them.  I took everything in the house, whether it had my name on it or not!  Just seeing that just made me want them.  I feel better today,(physically) but mentally I am wanting it and it has only been three days.  Where do you get this "Thomas's Receipe"?  I keep seeing parts but it does not give exact mg of each supplement or vitamin.  Also, I too, need to find a confidental meeting for NA.  One for professionals.  Any ideas?

Thx
LostGirl

[tex3]

Hi lost, this is tlk but with a new nickname. If you go to the NA website (do a google or other search for "Narcotics Anonymous" and it will take you to the site) you can search for meetings in your area. There will be a schedule that will describe the format (non-smoking, etc) and I think you can find some for professionals there, as well. What part of the country are you in?

Although I feel pretty strong, I still think if I had anything in the house, I would take it. The cocktail got me through the worst of the W/Ds. It still sucked, but it wasn't as bad as it would otherwise have been. This is what my doctor prescribed:

Phenobarb (the main thing that helped), 1-2 every six hours
Clonidine (a blood pressure med, but also an agonist that really helped me), every six hours
Skelaxin or Zanaflex (muscle relaxer; very important), every six hours
Bentyl or Robinul (for stomach cramps), every 4-6 hours
Remeron or Doxipen (for sleep)
For the first three days I took a very, very small dose of hydro with the above. For example, I was taking between 150-200 mgs of hydro a day, and for the W/Ds I only took about 15 mgs the first day, then 10 mgs the second day, then 5 mgs the third day. After that I just took the cocktail. I was on it for about six days.

The recipe is a good mult-vitamin, L-Tyrosone (an amino acid that makes your neurotransmitters repair faster, as I understand it; your neurotransmitters really get screwed up when you've been on opiates regularly) which helps with depression; 5HTP, Zinc, Magnesium, and I believe a few other things. Others here are much more qualified than I am to give you this info, and I don't want to get it wrong so I'll leave it to them. Right now I'm taking the strong mult-vitamin, L-Tyrosone (sp?), and feverfew (for bad headaches, which hit me about 10 days into my recovery and have been almost daily; I started the feverfew on Friday and it's really helped). My mental clarity is getting much better, as is my mood. I still hit really low points, but every day seems to get easier. The cravings didn't hit me until last week, but they are manageable and usually pass quickly. Still, if I had hydros I'm afraid I would take them, so I just don't let myself get in that situation; for me, that's just a setup for failure. Others have more willpower than I do, though.

Are you detoxing now, or where are you at? tracy/tlk/tex3

[groovygirl]

wow - congratulations!!!  two weeks is a BIG achievement.  i've never made it that far....except with buprenex and that doesn't really count.

you are really on your way...good luck to you!!!!!

[Witchywoman]

Nod congratulations on 2 weeks! You're past most of the physical stuff, but now comes the mental battle.  Just know we are here for you no matter what.

JB, thanks for your words.  Wise as ever.  I managed to get clean with a full bottle of 120 vicoprofens in my house. I wanted to be clean so battle they were not a temptation. But I flushed them a few weeks ago, after 8 months clean, when I came extremely close to relapse and realized that I was holding them in my hand....too close a call for comfort, so down the toilet they went.

If I had to put into a few key words the things that help with recovery, at least for me, they would be:

Truth
Unconditional acceptance
Patience
Persistance
Surrender
Faith

Down with Shame!

I'm sure there's more, but those are what strike me right off the bat.

I need you all.
Thanks,
WW