I have been around drugs for years, and even had a substance abuse problem of my own, which have sucessfully overcome. Opiates were never my drug of choice. The lethargy and the nausea really weren't things that appealed to me. But I am awfully curious to see if my boyfriend is...
We have been dating for two years now. Before this onset, I was aware that my boyfriend was snorting Roxicet for recreational drug-use, "Blues" we call them. He always told me when he was on them or doing them, and I never really cared, I would be a hypocrite if I did. But since I cleaned myself up from the various uppers I was doing, he started selling Roxicets. Since I had removed myself from my drug of choice, I figured it would be safe enough to remove myself from them all together. I asked him kindly to stop dealing and using.
For a while, it really seemed as if he stopped. He didn't have money all the time, he didn't seem out of the norm, until recently.
It started when he met up with me after hanging out with his friend. His eyes seemed far away, red even, I didn't notice his pupils. His voice was hoarse, and he was mumbling a little. We started doing "the deed" and he couldn't keep it up. It was weird, but I didn't think about it. He was also hanging out with a friend who has a BAD opiate use problem. From time and again, I got the feeling that he was using. His eyes were red, pupils small. Slurred speech. He started nodding off when we watched TV. He also complained of never being able to get sleep, blaming it on stress. Both of his best friends use Roxicets as well.
One day I had the pleasure of reading his text messages. One was two the said friend "Could you get me two?" The next text message said "Did you get those?" I'm not an idiot. I confronted him, asked him what he meant by those messages. He said he didn't know, and claimed to not remember writing them. Of course, not wanting to be made a fool of I slowly pryed it out of him. He said he just wanted them for New Years, but swore up and down that he hasen't done them and was happy he didn't get them.
A few days ago, he started telling me he was getting sick. He said he had a terrible migraine, along with body aches and a runny nose. But I remembered that he had no money, so doing the math in my head. I figured he was withdrawing.
Today, he got paid. He was with his opiate abusing bestfriend all day. When I met up with him I immediately had the feeling he was on them. His voice was hoarse and mumbling. His pupils were constricted and wouldnt change, regardless of the light int the room. I noticed from time to time, him sniffing and rubbing his nose. He also blamed his behavior on depression, and the fact that he was nauseous from not eating all day...
I would appreciate any input you could give me, and perhaps any stories of your own, which can relate to my boyfriends symptoms. I am very concerned and I do not know how to bring these concerns up to him. He automatically gets defensive, and almost offended. He asks why I don't trust him and says things like "you know our relationship is way more important to me than drugs, that's why I don't do them"
please tell me i'm not a crazy suspicious girlfriend, and please please please share your stories with me