Urgent -- Husband Has Disappeared !!!!!!!!!!!

[DeltaRedd1984]

My husband has not been seen or heard from since September 24, 2009.  He has a cell phone in his possession but refuses to answer calls from anyone including his parents. We tried texting him to find out if he is OK but he refuses to respond to anyone's text message.  He is a crack/meth addict.


Facts:

1) My husband and I were married for 11.5 years and never did anything remotely
    like this although we are currently separated, we still maintain contact.  He is
    living with
    his parents.
2) His parents claim he has never done this before
3) My husband has $2500 in cash on him prior to disappearing.  
4) My husband is 44 years old

Questions:

1) Is this normal behavior for a crack/meth addict?
2) When should the family report him missing to the police department?

[Some_life1976]

first let me say how sorry i am that you are going through this right now! have you tried calling from a number he doesnt know? Do you know who he uses with can you track them down to see if they know where he is or if they have seen him? if none of that works and you say his never done this b4? it is normal for some addicts to disppear for days at a time while on a bing and thats a good amount of money for a bing. but you know him best if you feel this is not right even if he is useing you may want to contact the police but....... i would go looking for him first contact his friend go to there houses tell them your worried leave notes if no one answers if he knows you next step is calling the police he will call someone good luck i whis you well

[dominosarah]

I would be reporting him missing NOW.  Please keep us posted..........sara

[leeisgettingclean]

plaese report him missing...that kind of money on him could get him high true enough, but could also be enough to get him hurt. please report it to the cops!

[troubleinohio]

i agree with the above responses...and Im sorry youre going through this... 24 hours is the amt of time I believe, for most adults that you can report them missing... I would be concerned of him being a robbery victim with that much money on him...not trying to scare you but Im sure you're aware of the dangers that goes along with Street Drugs/crime... keep us posted please..

[Holliee]

I left you a private message my sis use to be on crack so may help you. Check your inbox.  Hollie
I do agree w/others call police NOW!!!!

[avisg]

Call the police its been over a week .Yes crack addicts sometimes take off for days at a time but this is over a week .one of my best friends husband was a crack addict yes there were times he would disapper for 3 days at a time but never ever this long CALL POLICE ASAP ..plz let us know what happens I will say a prayer for you :)
avis

[chopper841]

ok this I can really help, first the fact that he has used in the past is not of much importance unless it was recent.  The fact he had $2500 on him when he left is very important and he could be the victim of robbery or even something worse. Do exactly what everyone says report him missing let PD know he has a cell phone and he can be tracked by cell phone towers.  It may take up to 48 hours but if he is on your account you can give them the authority to get the information.  They will be able see the calls he made and will talk to each individual on his phone bill, but there is always a pattern numerous calls to one number that will lead to the answer.  I will pray for you and your family please keep us posted

[Some_life1976]

I have been thinking of you. any news?

[DeltaRedd1984]

My mother-in-law will be contacting the police today.  I will keep everyone here posted.  Thanks to all of you who replied to my post.  Thanks for your prayers and support you just do not know how this forum has help me in dealing with my addict husband these last several months.

[DeltaRedd1984]

This is a bit unreal.  We live in Mississippi my mother and father in-law live in Jackson.  Today, my mother-in-law spoke to someone in the Jackson police department and informed them about her missing son.  

The police could care less, they informed my mother-in-law  that her son was 44 years old and a drug user and that disappearance  was typical behavior for crystal meth and crack addicts.  

They also informed her that there was little they could do since my husband is grown and they believe he does not want to be brother or found.

The office that spoke to my mother-in-law was rather rude and insensitive about her situation.  We tried again today to call and text message him but no response.

I do not know his hang out spots and neither do his parents.  The friends he have are on the shady side and I do not know them nor do I want to know them.  

This behavior seems so selfish and unnecessary all my husband needs to do is to text message someone and let them know he is alive.  I hate all this drama.

There appears that that is nothing else the family can do except pray that he will eventually surfaces and finds help.  

Thank you all for your support and prayers.

[bmdad]

If the police won't do anything about it, take it to the news or to the papers. I know here in IL there is stuff on the news about missing adults at times. Did you try local police? If not, try county or even state. There has to be something they can do. Also, can you get to your cell phone account online? If not, go to your provider and have them print off your most recent phone log. You can see if any calls have been made from or to his phone and see what numbers were used. You could then call some of those numbers and find out what he has been up to. I'm so sorry and wish you the best.

[Mememe79]

I agree with everyone telling you to call the police. The thing about needing 48 hours is false unless you have the worlds oldest cell phone. Almost every cell network offers GPS for about an extra 5 or 10 dollars a month. If the cell phone is GPS equipped you should be able to contact the provider (assuming your name is on the account) and have the GPS enabled, from there you should have a location within minutes. I know that doing this on Nextel is a little shaky, Gettling locations on the nextel map are usually off if your in an area where the signal is weak. I've had better luck with this on Verizon phones. My mom has used the nextel one to track my stepdad. My wife has used the verizon one on me, and I have used the Nextel one to find my brother in a crack house. These do work very well and are cheap to have enabled. On the other hand, if you go that route, don't ever tell him you turned it on. Hope that helps.

[avisg]

yes I would contue to report it everyday until someone agrees to help and go to the papers let them know that becuse he uses drugs that his life is somehow less important .

[Greatgreebo]

Call your all the hospitals and ask if they have ANY john doe's in their care. It is a grim task but if someone is hurt or in a psych. ward and they have no ID and can't/won't talk the hospital won't know who they are. Leave a detailed description and what he was wearing when he disappeared.. Also, keep calling the police. Call the city, county and state police everyday if need be..good luck and keep us posted.

[Some_life1976]

i know you said his friends were shady but after dealing with the police and calling hosptials you may want to find a big guy to go with you and start asking his friends if they have seen him do not go alone!! if you dont get anyware go back to the police ask to talk to a superviser if he gives you the run around ask to talk to someone in missing persons dont stop or leave till you get the answers you desiver remind then that they WORK FOR YOU!! let them now you will file a complant and ask for there names. you have to be a bit of a witch but stick to your guns and someone will help i hope this is over soon you poor thing! please keep us posted

[Jules1866]

DeltaRedd,

I have read online that there is some service you can pay online to use, its like $100 and they will help you access a cell phone number and be able to read all the tex message and listen to the voice mail. not sure the name but if you google something like (cell phones and accessing info) just a thought, it was happening to  a co-worker of mine....worth a try...

I am really sorry you are going thru this. keep us posted.

jules

[leeisgettingclean]

any news yet? please keep us posted as i am very concerned

[arc174]

Hi, hope he comes home soon.
I was addicted to crack for 2 years, it's awful, but if he left with 2500, he's spent that by now, he'll be home soon, don't worry this is normal crackhead behavior.
Someone most likely stole his phone.
God Bless,
arc

[DeltaRedd1984]

He finally called his mother last night and told her that he was beyond help.  He sold his SUV and told her that the only thing he has not lost yet was his life.  We are all very frighten for him.  The way I see it, he is either going to get on his knees and ask the God of his understanding for help or he is going to continue down the road that he is currently traveling.  My only thoughts today are how deep does his rabbit hold go.  He has a phone number to call if he wants help. All I can do now is to pray for him that he will be relived from his pain and suffering.

[dominosarah]

I am so glad that he called his mother.  I hope he finds his way......Please take care of yourself.          sara

[Some_life1976]

I am so happy someone has heard from him. your right all you can do now is pray and hope he calls for help soon my thoughts are with you

[LostButterfly]

next time someone talks to him, they need to convince him to come home or at least meet up with a family member... maybe he needs money? or something that would be enticing to him that he would want to meet. once u meet, u gotta try to get him help or something!!
it sounds to me that he is at the end of his rope & is very possible that he's gonna keep using til he overdoses, or try to end his life. Not to be harsh, but its reality of an addict who can't see any light at the end of the tunnel. He needs help! He may hurt himself! And u said he called his mom & already sold his SUV & said the only thing he hasn't lost yet was his life... well he very well may be thinking of taking that away too! Try to help him, I know its hard & u have no idea how, but gotta keep trying!!

Good luck!!

[DeltaRedd1984]

I just read what you said and tears came to my eyes.  After I read your post, I text message him a phone number he could call for help.  I told him that the man at the other end of the line would come and help him.  In the message, I told him that his life has meaning and value, that I loved him.  I am praying so hard that he calls the phone number gets the help he needs.

[LostButterfly]

thats good. lets hope he reaches out.
it is a harsh reality of the possibilities of what he may be capable of, but its reality. I'm sure all addicts have had down points where u just don't know what to do & thoughts of ending your own life have ran thru your head, at least for me i've been there. Just due to the stresses & all the **** we've gotten ourselves into. Disappointment, shame, guilt, depression, worthlessness, etc... Its hard to see that we could ever get ourselves better.(i have not seeked rehab help myself yet, but at least i am no longer in denial, & know i need help)
Just keep trying, don't give up on him. And keep letting him know how much u care, that he has a purpose in this world, that you need him, and not sure if u have kids- but if so-stress that they really need him! And grand-babies etc... Let him know that this set-back is not a failure!! It is only a *set-back* and that he has plenty of life left to live & make it worth it! That he can start new & fresh!

Just keep trying!
Good Luck to you & your/his family!