This is a deadly disease

[gnarly_1]

hello my M/H family there has been a serise of events that has awaken me that addiction is a deadly disease for the first time pain pill addiction has killed more people people the heroin and cocaine combined it was also on the news that it has sepased auto acedents in deaths for our state...it really hit home with a close friend of mine from N/A.. Gus has been around several years his 21 your old son was a oxy addict he had been clean for a wile but still struggled.. Mike gus's son was clean for some time and was at his 21 birthday....he decided he would use to celabraite.... Gus found him the next day dead.. the autopsy showed it was in fact a drug overdose..he lost the battle Gus was beside himself he also blamed himself for not trying to do more the real sad part Mike was going to be a daddy and 3 days later his girlfriend gave birth to a beautiful baby boy I wanted to support him so we both went to the hospital to see his new grandson it is so sad that his little boy will never know his daddy this disease kills every day Mike was no different then us if left alone this disease can very well kill you so if your out there trying to get clean let this be a note that you may never have a second chance....it is things like this that happen every day.. family's are destroyed and yet we take pills like there is nothing wrong with it.. many here will get clean  use get clean use it is a viscous cycle...you must break the chain your life depends on it you must treat the disease ....this is why I push N/A so hard on this forum those that go to meetings tend to stay clean  it will also teach you a new way to live drug free so for those out there your fighting for you life so treat it that way you would do any thing to get high so put the same effort forward to do your aftercare today Gus forgives himself but there will always be a whole in his heart......

[nonny419]

I;m sorry to hear of your friend.My son lost his friend a few months back.He was in college and prescribed Oxys and then turned to heroin .He stop and was clean for a year. We saw him graduate with a Masters in Business at 26 and 2 weeks later he was found by his dad and brother dead with a needle in his arm. He was moving out and found an old pack of dope and it took him away. My husband is a Dr. and his phone rings all the time people wanting pain pills.I lost 14 years after being prescribed Dilaudid after I lost my lung to lupus.I ended up going to the Methadone clinic for a 30 day detox since I never abused drugs I was a pain management patient they put me at 168mg    of methadone 14 years lost .I am off it and surprisingly my rib pain hurt more on meds  When I got to 20 mg the pain started going away I trusted my doc who said after that surgery all  I had left was" Jesus and morphine." I wish I would have stuck to my roots in Natural medicine ,those who thing a pain pill takes away hurting ,it don't .Your body shuts down and you will get rebound pain ,even something as simple as Tylenol can cause it. I know ther is a big crack down coming on the pain meds ,the med boards are really clamping down . So ,Hopefully the methadone clinics that have now become a booming business due over prescribing, will soon start saving those in need and stop over dosing those who don't.

[ang_811]

sorry to read this Gnarly. But if not treated this disease seeks to kill and destroy. A friend of mine also losy her son to this disease. He was 19 years old and decided to take his own life just the other day. Its so sad to see people die from this disease knowing that there is a way out and it don't have to be like that anymore. This isn't a game. We need to always take this disease seriously. Its a matter of life or death for us and today I choose life.

[Brightfutureahead]

Hi Gnarly and Hi everyone :-) yes, I'm still here. This is an excellent reminder for everyone. I've been teetering a bit on my aftercare. This gave me the kick in the a** I need to stay on track!  Sorry about your friend.

[Sonrissa]

Thanks Gnarly, saying prayers for you and Gus and his family. I'm praying for strength and comfort.  This is such a sad and devastating reminder for us all how deadly this disease truly is.  Take care.

[gnarly_1]

Thant for all the kind words we need to know this is a serious disease
I got to see Gus recently and he looked like a train wreck it will take time but he has a huge following in N/A many have reached out to him in his time of need  noone wants to beary  there son and for every one here your husbands wife's and friends dont want to burry you ether
if we all stay on track use some form of after care we wont keep seing people over and over Gus has been in n/a for many years and he told me he did not use over this the truth can be painful I still have friends fighting the good fight the war is not over as long as your willing to keep fighting.............Gnarly............................

[dominosarah]

I am so sorry to read this Mark.  This is always such a tragedy.  None of us are exempt to this.  I wish comfort for his family and you~

[motye51]

Your post is one of the truest ive read in a long time. We've lost 2 young people in the N/A group that i attend. Great post....i just hope more people read it!!

[tooter212]

Gnarly , Thank you for this post. "There but for the Grace of God go I"
God Bless you

[weaver71]

This makes me think of something I say often about aftercare. When things feel good and under control, work your program extra hard. He was likely feeling good and ready to party and feel even better on a special occasion. I sure wish he had gone to extra meetings and reached out to sober friends for his birthday. I am never satisfied with my recovery. I am always looking for new things to add and checking to see if what I am doing is all I can be. I am certain I would be dead without aftercare. Recovery is not a thing I do, it is how I define my life, it is a way of life that I replaced my old life with. Thanks gnarly, and I am sad for what the world has lost.

[atthebeach]

I am so sorry Mark. Unfortunately, yes addiction does kill.
It is so sad. too many are losing their lives and most of them are young.
We have also known too many young people who have died in their addiction.
Praying  for you and for mike's  family,
Debbie

[lulu747]

Awe Mark-

I am so sorry.  This is a devastating and all to familiar story.  One of my student's has a brother in the throes of oxy addiction.  In and out of rehab and won't go to aftercare.  I've tried to support him as best I can by talking about NAR-AL-anon.  Same thing with another friend, long sober.  Stopped going to meetings for a few weeks because he was too "busy" with his art.  Nearly killed himself when he relapsed with alcohol a week ago and then kept going.  He got kicked out of his sober house and refused to talk to his sponsor.  Then he landed on another good friend's doorstep a few days back and they kept him in lockdown until he sobered up and realized what he'd done.  He wasn't an alcoholic- he was a drug addict, he'd been in recovery for a few years and thought he was doing great so what would one drink do?  It nearly cost him his life.
So yeah- guard up at all times.  Recovery is a life long process.  It is the journey that never ends.
Thanks for posting.  I hope the newbies all read this and see that they may not have "One last time" in them.
Love
Lu

[jifmoc]

Good post, Gnarly. I wish it was mandatory reading for all the new folks on here.

[PurrfectlyKrazy]

I'm so sorry that all this happened to someone close to you.  Thank you for sharing the story.  I know it had to be hard for you but perhaps it will save someones life...hopefully a lot of someones.  You are SO right that aftercare is the most important part of getting clean!  You'll be happy to know that I'm doing the 2 meetings a month available to me, I'm now in an online support group and I'm doing weekly sessions with my Pastor.  Even when I was sick I had that session with him on the phone.

I thank you for that...because you nagged on it...I made sure to take advantage of every avenue that was open to me in my area.

[marycarmel]

This is so sad.  Thanks for sharing.  We found out this morning that mt 15-year old son's friend lost his father yesterday from a heroin overdose.  He's battled addiction for years, as well as mental health issues.  He was a veteran.  So many lives destroyed from addiction.

[Bubulous]

That was very powerful and a sad story my friend.  Some days you try to believe that this fight is going to be over but these deadly pills are worse than Anthrax, Small Pox, and well anything.  They are sooo bad because they negatively impact all aspects of our being.  Mind, Body, and Soul are all compromised and drained to the point where we forget who we are and we become zombies not even living in this world.....ugh I could go on and on but I will just stop.  Sorry bud :(

[clean_in_ks]

Thank you Gnarly for sharing with us......we all tend to think "it won't happen to me" until someone within our circle of life is affected.  Denial definitely will kill us.....and even after we get clean, if we don't get to the actual ROOTS of the emotions we masked for so long.....they are still "in there" growing.   Recovery program's PURPOSE is to help us "clean out" and "heal"......and if all we do is go to meetings and never DO the work asked of us (or go to Celebrate Recovery, etc. and NOT do the work) the INSIDE of us doesn't change.  We need to pull out the weeds.....keep the soil of our hearts fertile and tilled.....so the NEW things that get planted have a chance to grow and bloom.  You can't plant new seed in old, hard, unfertilized ground.  (And we all hate the fertilizer of life...but it's necessary)  
I'm so sad for Gus....for his new grandson and Mike's girlfriend.  The loss is too great for words.  Every life is precious....and while I understand Gus kicking himself.....we can no more work another addict's program that we can "get them clean"......my heart goes out to all of them....and I think you are a REALLY special friend, Mark~

[Sonrissa]

Hi Gnarly,  this story is so heartbreaking. I'm sorry for the loss of this young man.  This is an important reminder for all of us. Thank you for sharing. Aftercare is such an important step in this process.  Take care!

[vicki595]

I'm so sorry for your friend, Mark. You've made some excellent comments on the importance of aftercare...a great reminder for everyone.