39th. going down!

[CadillacJack]

not much more to say. feeling a little bluesy. memorial day weekend & no plans. already did the cemetery bit. guess i'll just chill at home. next holiday should be better.

[CadillacJack]

To be brutally honest, my wife missed out on many things over the years.

[desperate1111]

Well its day 40 now. Congratualtions! I'm sorry you are feeling blue. Even tho you're around 100 days behind me your posts have helped me to be more positive about moving ahead. I think your xwife is missin' out!

[newgirl2708]

We are going out to dinner on Saturday night, you can come along if you want to...if you do, maybe we'll bbq on Sunday..just let me know.
NG

[worried878]

u did flush those pills didnt u cj?

[worried878]

i know i sink into that sometimes and when u r there it is so hard to see beyond it....overwhelming at the time...i do try to think positively but i know it is hard sometimes...especially when we are alone....then i see others whose relationships causes them more lonliness and pain than my being alone...i think...what is wrong with me?  am i so difficult that i am destined to be alone...and to let u in on my number one trigger...i still love my stupid x...married for 17 years as well...cant do nuttin about it tho...i can sit here and beat myself up but he has moved on....i try to remember that and spend my time working on things that i can at least win at...instead of dwelling on something i can not change...urs is not at that point probably cj...but dont dwell on it excessively and i know it is hard to do...i do know using taint gonna bring him back...nor will i ever have another healthy relationship if i do...it is hard when u have regrets..things i coulda done differently

[ILoveLukey]

I could be crowned the depression queen. LOL. That's why I needed to try to take a different outlook on life. And yes, life really sucks sometimes. Somehow we make it thru.Take care and thanks for responding. Keep posting on your progress. We are all here for you whenever you need us.

[CadillacJack]

You're as right as rain. And you have all my sincere sympathy. It's easy to loose sight of what we do have in the face of a tragic loss. Depression is depression though. Everybody gets the blues. I wasn't really trying to cry. Life just sucks sometimes, for all. After all, everything is relative to the situation at hand.

Thanks, you make a difference.

[ILoveLukey]

Funny you mentioned that saying. Almost every morning I say to my cat "Life's a ***** and then you die". LOL. I don't really feel that way just so many bad things going on in my life this year so far. Lost my father 2 months ago and my sister/best friend had major brain surgery last week, dealing with the Sub and worriyng about when it is time to taper and how I will do, 18 year old daughter is 7 months pregnant to a bum, mothers dog is dying, etc. Like can you lay it on any thicker ???? Like I said , bad year so far. BUT, I always try to look at the bright side of everything. I think of how bad things could be and how bad some other people have it. I spent 2 days in center city Phili last week due to my sister's surgery. I saw homeless people.  People that have NOTHING. No family, no life, nowhere to live, no job, no food.  When you see that and think about it, your life really doesn't seem so bad.  I have a home, a loving family, a car, a job. Yes addiction sucks.  But things could be alot worse. I try to think of how things could be worse and that makes me feel better. Don't know if I am being of any help to you with this, just thought I would put my 2 cents in.  Hope I wasn't too long-toothed. Take care and hand in there.

[addict3]

sorry  about your wife, but go do something and try to get your mind on something else, it will help .....won't cure it but it will help.

I wish I had the right words to make you feel better as you have helped me in the past but this is about the best i can come up with now
.
Congrats on 39 days!!!!!      Good luck!!

[sadinmichigan]

yeah thats what I hear...some say..lifes a ***** and then you marry one...LOL...what are we gonna do???  It's gonna be ok..LOL  seriously..Big fat hugs to you!!(((((((((( (CJ))))))))))

[CadillacJack]

Thanks, Lisa:

That old saying "life sucks, and then you die" sometimes seems real. But we'll be OK. There are better days ahead, for both of us.

[sadinmichigan]

hey there my friend...I wish I had all the right things to say..but I don't..i am not doing so hot either...here i thought getting off drugs was going to change my life...HA..it has helped and I am glad..But it doesn;t make the problems that were always there go away...I am sorry you feel so crappy..I do too..at least your not alone in that...wish i could be more positive..But I am very happy that you have come this far...xoxoxoLisa

[rue10]

I'm sorry you're feeling down.  But think of how down you'd be feeling if you were full of pills AND missing your wife.  She's probably missing you too.  17 years just doesn't vanish simply because someone removes them self physically.

I hope you have a great weekend whatever you choose to do.

Blessings!

[Mikeinthesouth]

Cant say I miss my ex but I have never tried to site in her though. LOL I am sorry you are dealing with the whole divorce issue and wish it would be different for you but from somewhat experience is we get what we lost with a ton back so keep that in mind and if you two never see getting back together as an option you will find someome else special for you. Hang in there bro and don't let things get ya that blue without growing from it. Mike

[Mikeinthesouth]

Good deal you are doing great. I am right behind ya at 31.5 days. Mike

[worried878]

I am sorry u r blue...missing someone I love hurts worse than withdrawals for me....time can do all kinds of stuff tho....when the time is right u 2 will reconcile or u will meet the the next Ms Cadillac...hang in there cj

[joann1975]

i am sorry to hear that. i might be crossing the line but would she consider reconciling now that you are clean ??? i am sure there is more than i know but i always try to hope for the best! hey i have a crazy mom that's single.....but you might have to start using again so that wouldn't work.... :)

[CadillacJack]

i just miss my wife. 17 yrs., and split asout41 days ago. i'll live. thanks.

[joann1975]

i am sorry you have the blues! but you are this side of day 40! so that is a good thing! maybe you could find something to work on around the house to keep you busy this weekend! it could be worse..you could be like me so busy you can't stand it!