Aa
need help with my wife
my wife is addicted to lortab she doesnt know i know i think its about 5 a day not super sure but she only weighs 95 lbs i dont want to attack her because i have seen what this drug does i want a game plan before i act does anyone have any advice PLEASE HELP also she is a woderful person and the world is losing a great one fast i also know her sorce but if i enterupt that shell sart hunting them and the people only get worse
i really think she is in denial but havnt talked to her to be sure just other people that are worried shes not ready to stop in her heart but maybe in her mind she is this is so crazy to me thank you for your help
Hey Hubby!
I hid my addiction to Norco 10/325mg for 5 years from my husband. He was, however, on to me. I had surgery January 5 2010 to remove an ovary & son of a gun! Just when I really needed pain meds instead of just wanting them the pharmacy cut me off! My husband came home from the drugstore with ibuprofen & informed me that my insurance company had "red flagged" me as an opiate abuser. The jig was up & I confessed. I was so relieved that I no longer could go to my MD with another ailment & get my monthly 240 pills. The dosage should have been 8 a day. I was taking 20 & running out in less than 2 weeks! She wants help - how did you find out? Us addicts are a sneaky bunch & if she's anything like me, functional on dope. be gentle, no threats or ultimatums. You sound very compassionate & caring. Show here your post & help her get to NA. She is adrift in a sea of despair looking for a beacon of hope. Be the lighthouse. Praying for you both.XOXOX
I hid my addiction to Norco 10/325mg for 5 years from my husband. He was, however, on to me. I had surgery January 5 2010 to remove an ovary & son of a gun! Just when I really needed pain meds instead of just wanting them the pharmacy cut me off! My husband came home from the drugstore with ibuprofen & informed me that my insurance company had "red flagged" me as an opiate abuser. The jig was up & I confessed. I was so relieved that I no longer could go to my MD with another ailment & get my monthly 240 pills. The dosage should have been 8 a day. I was taking 20 & running out in less than 2 weeks! She wants help - how did you find out? Us addicts are a sneaky bunch & if she's anything like me, functional on dope. be gentle, no threats or ultimatums. You sound very compassionate & caring. Show here your post & help her get to NA. She is adrift in a sea of despair looking for a beacon of hope. Be the lighthouse. Praying for you both.XOXOX
active addictilon is deadly serious. it is a life threatening condition that affects every aspect of being -- physical, mental, emotional,and spiritual. one of the hallmarks of addiction is the inability to stop despite the strongest, most sincere desire to do so.
if desire to quit where the key to recovering from addiction, most addicts would have done so long before we did (or before we will). but desire, no matter how strong, is almost meaningless.
active addiction is a medical condition . . . it is use of a substance that is beyond the user's control. quitting because you want to is control, which is exactly what the addict doesn't have.
if someone you loved were on the floor turning blue and dying, would immediately give them the help they need or stand over them asking "do you want help?" what if they were able to answer and they said "no" or "leave me alone, i'm fine," would you turn and walk away. what if an almost universal symptom of the trun-blue-and-die disease was denial, a steadfast belief by the afflicted that a horribly obvious problem isn't a problem (and an even stronger belief that if it is, it MUST be fixed on their own).
the answers is obvious, isn't it?
i think it's no less obvious in the case of active addiction. the addiction professionals that save my life taught me that the biggest predictor of sustained recovery is length of treatment. period. desire to quit, no matter how strong, has little or nothing to do with it. treatment works and long term treatment works best, wheather the addict wants it at the beginning or not.
i was forced into treatment kicking and screaming. i didn't want it. i didn't want it all. as i (a grown man with four children) was being taken to my second rehab in six months my 79 year old mother said "i hope you really want it this time." she burst into tears when i screamed at her "YOU JUST DON'T GET IT DO YOU? I DO WANT IT AT ALL!!! I WISH I HAD SOME RIGHT NOW." And I meant every word. every single word.
but i was put in a safe place and given the treatment that my condition required. it took some time (i was WAY past 5 tabs a day), but i was slowly brought fully into recovery.
it's just not true that an addict can't be helped until they want to stop. i'm living proof of that and i know many, many others who are as well. many will resist treatment, but not near as many as will slip further into the jaws of death if they are left alone "until they want it."
if it were my wife, i'd get her the help she needs, recogonizing, however, that she's sick. not bad or weak. she's not a bad person who needs to become good again, she's a sick person who needs to become well again.
CATUF
1708
if desire to quit where the key to recovering from addiction, most addicts would have done so long before we did (or before we will). but desire, no matter how strong, is almost meaningless.
active addiction is a medical condition . . . it is use of a substance that is beyond the user's control. quitting because you want to is control, which is exactly what the addict doesn't have.
if someone you loved were on the floor turning blue and dying, would immediately give them the help they need or stand over them asking "do you want help?" what if they were able to answer and they said "no" or "leave me alone, i'm fine," would you turn and walk away. what if an almost universal symptom of the trun-blue-and-die disease was denial, a steadfast belief by the afflicted that a horribly obvious problem isn't a problem (and an even stronger belief that if it is, it MUST be fixed on their own).
the answers is obvious, isn't it?
i think it's no less obvious in the case of active addiction. the addiction professionals that save my life taught me that the biggest predictor of sustained recovery is length of treatment. period. desire to quit, no matter how strong, has little or nothing to do with it. treatment works and long term treatment works best, wheather the addict wants it at the beginning or not.
i was forced into treatment kicking and screaming. i didn't want it. i didn't want it all. as i (a grown man with four children) was being taken to my second rehab in six months my 79 year old mother said "i hope you really want it this time." she burst into tears when i screamed at her "YOU JUST DON'T GET IT DO YOU? I DO WANT IT AT ALL!!! I WISH I HAD SOME RIGHT NOW." And I meant every word. every single word.
but i was put in a safe place and given the treatment that my condition required. it took some time (i was WAY past 5 tabs a day), but i was slowly brought fully into recovery.
it's just not true that an addict can't be helped until they want to stop. i'm living proof of that and i know many, many others who are as well. many will resist treatment, but not near as many as will slip further into the jaws of death if they are left alone "until they want it."
if it were my wife, i'd get her the help she needs, recogonizing, however, that she's sick. not bad or weak. she's not a bad person who needs to become good again, she's a sick person who needs to become well again.
CATUF
1708
your wife does have to want to stop...but with your love, support, and guidance...maybe she'll decide that it is something that she wants to do. do talk to her... believe it or not...so many times it is a RELIEF to the addict when they dont have to hide their addiction anymore. it takes alot of work to feed their addiction. maybe...just maybe...she is ready.
support her recovery but not her addiction.
support her recovery but not her addiction.
Tuff call. Sorry to tell you,there is really nothing you can do until she wants to stop.
Talk to her. Let her know you know. be supportive but that is all you really can do.
Terry
Talk to her. Let her know you know. be supportive but that is all you really can do.
Terry
Hi and welcome. more than likely she wants to stop taking them, but has some fear. I am certainly no expert, but what would have helped me is if someone that I love came to me and basically said "i know, i see and I care about you. I will do everything in my power to help you". Perhaps you can show her this site? Maybe if she sees that there are many others in the same boat, it will enable her to see herself here. She has to want to stop though. Do you sense that? one more thing is that I would pray that God will reveal to her what this is doing to her. Hang in there. If not now, there will be a time when she finally says i have had enough. Sorry for your heartache and dont give up on her.
WHOA! PLEASE STAND BY HH SOMEONE HERES GOTTA HAVE AN ANSWER..I FEEL YOUR PAIN THOUGH U JUST WANT YOU WIFE BACK...
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