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Cancer Phobia!
I seem to be spiralling badly with this health anxiety.First, it was a fixation with my heart.That has now been ruled out.Then, just as I started feeling better a new anxiety has taken its place .I now think I may have cancer!I thought I was doing well for a while accepting that my symptoms were not cardiac,but anxiety.Now its as if my my mind wont let me relax and is trying to find another basis for my recurring symptoms.Why cant I just accept it for what it is-my anxiety dissorder!I really am losing faith in my sanity.This is truly a nightmare condition to live with!!If only the symptoms went away,then I guess anxiety would not be a problem.Or is it the other way around,that subconscious anxiety is creating the symptoms.I GIVE UP!!!
Dimi.xx
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Oh gosh I'm crying my eyes out reading all these post on here I've actually found a medial condition for what I keep doing and have done for almost a year now and that is health anxiety.like all you I've got at the min lung cancer throat cancer bowel cancer I've a dogy heart and irritable bowel syndrome and I'm going to die of all that next week.this is taking over my life I get panic attacks which I know I bring on myself every little ailment I get its cancer and I'm going to die.sone days are better than others I find it very hard to plan the future I've 2 young boys who I fear are going to grow up with out me cause I'm going to die right I'm riddled with cancer it's awful I weight myself everyday to see if there's any weight loss I do some proding around looking for lumps I can't watch anything on the tv to do with cancer I like some of you can't go doctors as I fear the worst I realy don't know where all this has stemed from atall it's ruining my life.thanks.x
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I am 29 and just found out I had skin cancer. I had it removed and all is good. I have a nice scar on my chest but am cancer free. I now however have talked myself into thinking that I have lung failure, torn my muscle in my breast, popped my implant, had a tumor in my armpit, had cancer in my armpit that was running down my arm, heart failure, blood diseases. Breathing problems, dizzy, brain failure, you name it, I've had it. To be clear, I've had blood tests done (still working on that fear, the doctor said all was normal but I don't believe him so I am having a second opinion) all is normal, I've had ultra sounds on my breasts and armpit and they found nothing, my breathing is great, lungs are clear, everything is normal and healthy with me. I am seeing a shrink. I have a hard time believing her at times but I am hoping that after this second opinion of my bllod work comes back that if all is normal then I may (God I hope so) be able to get my life back. I hate this feeling and I am TERRIFIED that I am pushing my family away and don't want my 6 year old to see him mommy losing her mind.
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I to have this and remember it first started with a hemorrhoid that in my mind was colon cancer despite every dr telling me it wasn't. Finally a colonoscopy confirmed it wasn't for me. Right now I have what I call a bump on my tongue (wife says it looks like my tongue and nothing else) well I of course am convinced it is oral cancer.  Mind you I have never smoked, never done snuff, almost never drink and I am 31 and have no family history of cancer.  My odds are like 1 in a 1,000,000 if even that high but in my mind I am that one. Has anybody tried any meds or anything that helps. I always say I wish I was that simple minded person that didn't care to Google symptoms or much less care.  These are only two examples of mine but once this is cleared tomorrow (by cleared I mean dr telling me nothing is wrong) then I am sure it will be something else.  I even tell myself to stop looking for things to be wrong but we all know that is almost impossible.
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This started a few years ago for me.  I changed into a high stress occupation and the anxieties started cropping up.  Heart disease (I could FEEL the inefficient pumping, once the Internet directed me to look for it), lung cancer (ex smoker with a recurring cold, which naturally couldn't be the viruses my kids brought home from daycare), kidney and liver disease, RABIES (picked up something a wild animal had chewed on) and a variety of other serious and terrifying conditions.  Today I got a diagnostic mammogram after noticing a lump.  Turned out to be cysts, so boy was I relieved to be wrong again.  I had this uncanny, unnerving feeling that I was about to hear horrible news, and everything felt surreal.  I think the medics think I'm a basket case...or am I being paranoid?

This anxiety is debilitating.  I don't feel confident in my future and am too often saddened by the thought of leaving my kids.  I wish I didn't immediately run to the worst case scenario and constantly "intuit" mortal danger.  I'm considering volunteering to work with cancer or terminally ill patients.  Maybe being around people who are REALLY dealing with these issues will be beneficial, for them and for me.  
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I just posted above.  Forgot to mention that the one thing I DO have is "pre-cancer" on a patch of skin on my forehead.  I've seen a dermatologist and am treating it.  Ironically, I am not really worried about it and am pretty sure it's going to be fine.  I just can't seem to handle anything else that well.
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The fear of cancer has been with me since I was young.  Back in the day, I used to read a medical encyclopedia that my family had.  I gradually got over the fear, but when I turned 40, I was diagnosed with a very aggressive stage 3 ovarian cancer.  I am 2 years from diagnosis and on continuous chemo for my first recurrence.  However, despite all of these bad things, I am still living life. Still working and doing what I enjoy.  Cancer is a nightmare for sure, but it can be sucessfully treated.  In my case, I can't be cured but I am keeping it stable.  Yoo would be surprised how strong you can be when confronted with something as scary as cancer.
Wishing you many blessings!
Kim
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how do you deal with that. Right now I had floaty  things in my urine now I think I have kidney or bladder cancer. This *****
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Reading your post reminds me so much of what I am going through.  In October I decided I should go for a check up since I hadn't been there for a while.  Also my bowl habits had changed so I wanted to bring that to his attention.  He ordered some blood work, referred me to a gastro doctor and did his examination.  He noticed that my neck was swollen on one side so he ordered an ultrasound.  I made an appointment to get my results.  He said I had nodules on my thyroid and a rather large one.  He then went on to tell me my cholesterol was high and tried to tell me what not to eat but honestly I didn't hear anything after "rather large nodule".  Well let me tell you the internet was not my friend.  All I did was worry until I found out it was a cyst.  Then my gastro doctor did her exam and found a lump.  Of course all I thought of was Farrah Fawcett.  After my colonoscopy it turned out to be benign polyps.  After that went to the ER with severe stomach pain.  After testing they found nothing.  Now on to my next problem I have a painful lump in the back of my head near my ear and low and behold I get an MRI next week and of course I am freaking out.  I think all this worrying is gonna kill me if nothing else does first.  Every time I get done with one with worrying about one  illness another one shows it's ugly head.  My family has had it with me.  I am constantly thinking of my mortality and I can't imagine what would happen if they actually diagnosed me with a horrible disease.  Hopefully this will be my last test for a while.
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I have been going through this for about a week.  I live with 4 cats who I am allergic to, who if I am in the same room with with start sneezing and get watery eyes.  For the past couple months, I have had sort of a wheeze.  I am pretty sure it is coming from my throat and not my chest and this is absolutely an allergy symptom.  However I recently saw a family friend who had been diagnosed with lung cancer (a man in his 60's who was a long time smoker and had previous cancers)  I have then become obsessed with my wheeze being either lung or throat cancer.  I have done about 10,000 google searches, the thought of going to to the doctors to get it looked at scares the hell out of me.  I have been dealing with panic attacks this entire week, feelings of my heart and body racing, numbness in my feet and hands, total loss of appetite, insomnia, constant stomach gurgling and diahrrea.  In the past couple days I have done better with the anxiety, I have stopped the cyrptic google searches, been much more relaxed, no major panic attacks, but the insomnia is still there and the appetite hasn't come back fully.  Just the thought of getting into bed brings up anxiety now.  I have been taking benadryl to both help with the cat allergies and to help put me to sleep.  This past week, I have rarely felt tired on my own, and the benadryl helps to force me to get some sleep because I know without sleep the anxiety is going to get worse again, if anyone has any tips for being able to end the insomnia it is one of my final hurdles to conquor.
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I have health anxiety. Pretty much about everything and it's continually getting worse because up until two weeks ago I thought I had throat cancer. It started with a lump sensation in my throat and I went to my pcp for it. She figured it was an infection and gave me antibiotics. Two weeks later I went back with the feeling still there. She suggested I wait a month before going to see an ENT. I agreed, but as soon as I got home I made an appointment with one that specializes in head and neck cancer. Before I got to go to the appointment I went to the ER twice because I had myself convinced it was cancer and just needed a doctor to say it. The first ER physician I seen said I had a ear infection and told me to come back in 48 hours if I wasn't better. Well of course I wasn't so I went back and told that doctor my fears. He did a CT scan, blood work, throat swab, and they all came back fine. I was relieved and okay until about 24 hours later when my anxiety came back and I was freaking out again. Fast forward a couple days through depression, crying, and constant googling that changed my diagnosis from throat cancer to tonsil cancer, to my ENT appointment. He said everything looked good and I have cryptic tonsils. Great! He said gargle with salt water and come back in three weeks. . . I went back in one week. He put the scope down my throat and said my throat was inflamed from acid reflux. He said it's most definitely not cancer and to stop worrying about it. I was doing great for about a week and than I changed my fiber supplements for my IBS and I started having abdominal discomfort. From then on my self diagnosis was pancreatic cancer, ovarian cancer, stomach cancer, leukemia, and most recently some kind of lymphoma. My grandmother even paid $230 for me to have blood work done. I'm driving myself completely nuts and making myself miserable. I'm talking to a therapist and it's helpful but not as much as I'd hoped. This phobia is ruining my life!
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It was both sad and validating to read so many of the comments here. This has been the story of my life for as long as I can remember. I'm 48 now. The thing that bothers me most, aside from the time I've lost to worry, is the unnecessary testing I've had done. So many invasive tests and CT scans, which have ultimately exposed me to radiation that can actually cause some of the things I'm worried about. :( Reassurance never lasts, and fear just raises its ugly head time and time again. I wish someone knew how to cure this.

Shakespeare wrote, "Cowards die many times before their deaths; The valiant never taste of death but once." I completely understand that quote.

I wish you all well.
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The anxiety is eating me alive. I'm literally convinced I have every type of cancer I have ever heard of. It's completely unreasonable...unless it's not, and I actually do have some sort of cancer, like primary unknown that has spread through my whole body. I'm terrified of going to the doctor because the possibility that they could tell me it is true is worse than thinking I'm just filled with cancer. The thought of going through treatments and suffering terrifies me. My dad had a higher stage cancer when I was in sixth grade, and i'm not sure if this has come from that or not. The earliest I remember dealing with it is in sixth grade, I had a little bump on my forehead that didn't feel like a pimple(still there to this day!) and I remember the fear that I had then. but the past year or so have been a horrible time. I think the anxiety is making it all worse. Literally, like some of you mentioned, one thing goes away, and almost immediately, another pops up. The cramps I get when I have my period are unbearable. they can't possibly be normal. Now, I have a sever vaginal itch, that I don't think is a yeast infection...so guess where my  mind is.... CANCER. it's such an ugly word. it's such an ugly thing. I hate it. I always want to sleep because this causes a depression, and plus, if i'm sleeping, usually it doesn't invade my dreams. Sometimes it does, and I wake up sweating, and shaky. Why does this have to be such a life controlling thing. I don't want to go on anxiety medication because i've heard they are addicting. but i NEED relief from this. it's ruining my life. It has me afraid to have sex because i'm afraid something is wrong down there. It has me afraid to basically live. The thought of going away to college in the fall is even being ruined by the thought of how life will be when I can't just sit in my room and cry over all of this.
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Hello...  I have been reading so many of these stories and it makes me so sad because I am the same way and I just want to enjoy my life.  I actually have had cancer so it is a real anxiety for me.  I have had severe stomach anxiety for the past several weeks and now that it has settled I am having so much burning in my upper stomach.  So guess where my mind goes.... the "C" word.   I do however go to the doctor when I feel this way.  I have made an appointment for this burning thing and cant get in for a couple of weeks.  Where is my mind going to go for 2 weeks?   I am hoping it is just ulcer symptoms.  I hope you are feeling better.  I have to tell myself to "let go and let God take charge"....  
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9624012 tn?1404909667
Oh my god, that was like reading my life, as I sit here now, im convincing myself im in the later stages of a deadly cancer, in my case it's usually lung cancer, I tell kyself there's no point going to the doctor or hospital because it's advanced and too late, sometimes I convince myself im going to have a heart attack, ive been the doctors for anxiety, im on anti depressants, tried beta blockers, actually thinking of trying a councillor now, its getting so bad, my chest burns, sometimes my left arm hurts, google told me it was angina or heart attack lol, I wish I could go back to the old me, I really do,hope we all find some peace with this horrible condition, I feel like im actually making myself ill and if I do get cancer, I will have given it to myself with all the worrying about it
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I am relieved to see that I am not the only one who suffers from this horrible anxiety.  Every pain or abnormality I get I'm sure is some form of cancer.  As a former smoker (3 years), I fear getting lung cancer.  Like many of the other posters, I've self diagnosed myself with throat cancer, lung cancer, oral cancer, etc.  I've gone as far as having a CAT scan which was prescribed by my doctor to assure me I don't have lung cancer.  I also suffer from occasional panic attacks, but they've subsided to almost 0 over the last few years.  What may make it so difficult is that we all probably believe that if we get cancer it will be terminal.  I wish I could live without this fear, but until I can at least it's somewhat of a comfort to know I'm not alone.
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I am obsessed with the fact I have some sort of cancer.. I can't live my life as I want, it's bringing me down big time! Been going on for about 4 or 5 months now. Not been to the doctors about one symptom just in case it's something bad, I'd be scared to find out. Sounds ridiculous when i try & explain it to somebody, they tell me I'm imagining it. I swear I have Breast cancer, but as times gone on, I'm starting to develop symptoms which is really frustrating. I just need to forget about it & move on with my daily life! Easier said than done I know but I know how everyone feels. The mind is a powerful thing!
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OMG, you have no idea how comforting it is to know I'm not the only person who feels like this!  I have had major anxiety issues after having my second child in december 2012.  My issues are health anxiety and insecurities.  About a month ago my heath anxieties reached a whole new level when I began having horrible abdominal cramping in my lower left pelvic region along with nausea and diarrhea.  So what did i do....I googled it, and what is one of the things that  comes up??? Ovarian cancer of course!  I freaked out, I'm 26 years old with a 3 year old child and an 18 month old child. I do not intent on leaving them anytime soon.  I went to the ER convinced I was dying and after 45 minutes of talking to nurses and then the doctor I was given a pregnancy test (which came back negative) and then sent home because I just had a intestinal bug or something.  A day later I called the obgyn and had a vaginal ultrasound scheduled.  I was so worked up about something horrible being found on the ultrasound that I actually had to have my mom bring me to my appointment.  Ultrasound was clear, no cyst or cancer.  I felt better that day but then things got worse that night.  I started having no appetite and I was feeling weak and of course those are symptoms of cancer!  I was sure I had intestinal cancer. I made an appointment with my GP and he said he thought I had a small intestinal infection.  He put me on antibiotics and they worked!!! But even though my pain was gone I still had this fear that something was wrong with me.  My GP said he would authorize a CT Scan or colonoscopy  just to put my mind at ease and I turned it down for fear of something being found!!!  He said I am a healthy young woman and to relax.  I have no idea why I have gone into such a panic mode, I am seeing an endocrinologist and getting my hormone levels checked because it is strange that it happened after having my second child.  I hope someone can help me, even if it's a therapist.  To constantly wonder if I have some life threatening illness is an awful feeling.  
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Thank you so much for your post!  I wish you all the best as you deal with your illness.  You're an inspiration to those of us who are panicked about a disease that we don't even have.  

Warmest wishes!
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Thank you so much for your post!  I wish you all the best as you deal with your illness.  You're an inspiration to those of us who are panicked about a disease that we don't even have.  

Warmest wishes!
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I can totally identify with all the posts here. I lost my mom's sister to breast cancer 4 years back and ever since then I am in constant fear. I am going to anti biotic, and ant acids for an infection which was giving me a burning sensation in my abdomen. that has gone away but I  still feel a discomfort. My throat and back of my nose has been clogged with excess phlegm since my high school days, then I think of throat cancer. my chest is hurting and I have tension in my shoulders. all the anxiety is driving me nuts. ironically in the past 3 days I have been watching movies which involved cancer patients.... not that I planned to watch the movies  knowing the story line, it just happened coincidentally. I even am obsessed with imagining my death and the fear of leaving my two babies, the fear of going through the phases of cancer.... that drives me nuts. and now with the Ebola virus... am always in fear even though there haven't been any confirmed cases in my country...to the extent that each time I touch money I sanitize my hands.... m going nuts.
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wow. i thank God himself for leading me to this page, I really thought that i was the only person in the world who worried about my health anxiety, Thank you all for opening my eyes and making me realize that i am not alone. So far i have had TB, Blood Clots, throat cancer, and finally, which i am currently trending to is Stomach cancer. Numerous times i have thought about going to the doctor and him saying You have 5 months to live or something drastic. I google my symptoms almost every 15 or 20 minutes within the last 3 or 4 weeks, i think that im going to leave my baby here on this earth, without a father, I am only 25 years and im a male, But i dont know what it is with my mind that i cant seem to get the thought out of my head. I havent seen a counselor or im not on meds. so, i have no help at all and i think that i am going to do something rash to myself.... which i wouldnt. It feels like im wrapped around it for a long long long long time. and when i go to google my symptoms it seems like  there there alll the time but they wasnt. my whole world is falling apart memory by memory. like the smallest gas pain would send me into a rage and calling my mom begging her to take me to the emergency room. all i hear from her is "your okay" and when my mind tells me.... "your gonna die" like.... i just want to sit down and weep. alot of stressful things have happened to me. like cabin fever, not being outside and living life. getting arrested. it feels like im trapped within my own mind. someone please... please help me
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I am so glad I found this site as I am so concerned as from reading all the posts I believe that my niece has health anxiety although she will never admit it as she is convinced she has cancer of every part of the body you can think of and no matter how many tests she has it will not convince her otherwise.  She also thinks her daughter has some form of cancer although she has had every test going and all showed clear.  Unfortunately my niece's job is talking to and advising cancer patients over the phone so every call she takes she relates it to herself and she is getting depressed and I don't know how to help her.  I am sure if I try and explain she has health anxiety she will just tell me I'm wrong and she knows best.   How can I talk to her and try to get her to see that she is not alone....x
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Hi everyone. I hope my story can help in some way. 2 months ago I had my first full blown panic attack out of nowhere. Same as all of you, I thought I had major ailments. Heart attack, cancer, brain tumors, stomach cancer, ect.  After I came on this forum the first time and read that every symptom I had was caused by anxiety. The weird stomach feelings and gas build up, joint pains and muscle pains/spasms, headaches, strange things happening with my throat, tingling sensations over my body and every other symptom I've read on the forum. That just pulled a switch in my head that physically I have no ailments. Which has caused the attacks to stop. The symptoms has lessened greatly but still persist. If I do feel something, I just link it to anxiety and it goes away in a few seconds. I also once to twice a week I dissolve a very small amount of epsom salt in water and drink that for a mini body detox without getting a running stomach. The epsom salt takes away toxins in the body which cleans up the mind as well, lessening depression and ultimately lessening anxiety. It has been 2 weeks since I first came onto this forum and its been the best 2 weeks of my life. All the best for all of you, take back control over your body. You have the power in you to do so.  Hope this helps you guys. Keep in touch.
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I'm so happy to have stumbled on this site.  I suffer greatly from anxiety.  Started in July and had just gotten worse.   I've had" colon cancer, uterine  cancer, ovarian cancer, bladder cancer and breast cancer.   I'm still dealing with the breast cancer freak outs since I've been told I have dense breasts which increase the risk.   It's literally stopping my life.  I have two kids that I cannot care for because I'm always thinking of what is hurting me now, or what lump I'm feeling.   I have started talking to someone and I have a very supportive husband.  I am taking the next step to get medicated to help get me over the hump.   It does help knowing there are others like me out there.  I will continue to fight to get ya elf back.  I will be 40 soon and that brings a whole new world of anxiety.  But I'll make it and live life again.  Best of luck to all of us suffering.
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Just remember your not alone. I do suggest getting some outside help.  I too kept myself hidden inside not enjoying life with my two young kids, it I'm fed up and want to live my life.  If ever anything does happen, we must deal with it then.  As for now you are ok. So enjoy life with your child.  I suffer terribly and have just started getting outside help and medication.  I was sick of seeing life pass me by. May as well be sick, we aren't living as it is.   I'm not going to allow myself to think that anymore and fight like hell to get through this.  Good luck to you!  You are stronger than this anxiety:)
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Hi to all from the UK. I am 60 this year ( yeah, the age when things start to happen !! ), and I have suffered from health anxiety now for over 20 years, since my mum died of lung cancer. I have had a prostate cancer scare ( NOT cancer ), and a testicular cancer scare ( NOT cancer ), although the specialist was crass, and wrote on the lab form ' ??? Malignancy'...and gave it me to take to reception !!!.

I have been on fluoxetene ( helps ) had counselling ( helps a little ) and currently I meditate with a bunch of Buddhists which is nice.

I have currently had MILD upper abdo discomfort ( I excercise and do pilates, so have been stretching ) for just over a week, and have now convinced myself I have stomach cancer, but remain afraid of going to the doctor as I am **** scared of having a scope. Its probably nothing, but this just goes to show how bad health anxiety can be....It ruins lives.

Point is I read so many posts here by young folks, but I am now at the age when this **** can happen, or at least its more of a chance to. Anyone else on her about my age..How the hell do you cope ???. We all have to die, but I am hoping I have a few more years yet !!

One thing over here is that the NHS is STILL ( for how long ??) free at the point of use, so we have no direct bills. That said I am sure my GP ( who is fine ) must be bloody sick of me turning up at the surgery with all these concerns

God Bless you all

Malc
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i had severe health anxiety 12 years ago and it has recently resurfaced. first it was my heart then colon cancer , then lympnode , it was horrible.....i did Xnax off and on when i needed but a wonderful therapist helped me thru it.

now fast forward 12 years and i discover a small lump on my breast just above my areola . by the way im a 49 yr old male

so now i self diagnosed my self with male breast cancer. and of coarse immediately went to google :-(   and i feel like im right back where i was so many years ago.

im so glad i found this forum just to know how many people are suffering like me



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I have been suffering with this most of my life. As a young child my grandfather( who was more like a dad to me, as far as we were extremely close). Went through lung cancer and passed. Then my mom, who was my best friend passed of cancer at53. I wouldn't leave her side the 2 years she lived. My uncle ( her brother) we were friends. Passed shortly after her. Yes cancer. I am terrified. I feel I know what it looks like, smells like and taste like. This Beast has haunted me. I continue to think I will get it or have it. Been on meds 26 years. Band aids. Went for therapy. Now trying a new therapy and if it includes meds then well see. I started with the shingles last year when I wasn't getting better. Then it must be cancer. Found out diabetic well diabetes drugs cause cancer. Went on extreme diet. Which helped the diabetes. Now I can not stop losing weight so it must be cancer after all. In between I had moles looked at. Ct of lungs, cyst remove. It just won't end. It is the devil. I wish Gods light will shine so bright in us. That neither the disease or the thought can live.
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11987212 tn?1422639685
I am so glad I have found this site, I thought I was alone with this awful thing,
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11987212 tn?1422639685
At the moment I am worrying about my left breast aching, I have been to the doctor who assures me it is nothing to worry about, I have been struggling with an awful cold which has left me with a cough (of course thats lung cancer) so now I am convinced I have that along with all the pocking and prodding of my breast (even though the doctor examined me too) and I found a tiny lump under my left armpit, thats it, I have the dreaded killer!! it's Friday and I know I am going to be worrying myself stupid all weekend HELLLP x
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11987212 tn?1422639685
oh me too fearful! it is terrible, and really scary not to mention lonely too, it feels like no-one understands how frightened you are and just say all the reassuring things ...until one says go see a doctor about that...and then argh!! terror envelopes you... I know xx
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11987212 tn?1422639685
Thankyou Marcel I may try this
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Hey everyone! I have been looking for something like this and as usual, Medhelp has my answers :) I am so relieved yet so saddened to see so many other people in the same boat as me. In the past year, I have 'battled' skin, pelvic, ovarian and various other cancers, yet nothing has come of it ha. i currently have three issues that I'm still waiting to see doctors about. My ongoing v. discharge between periods (if it happens again this month!) that I've already had exams/swabs/ultrasounds on, chest cancer (I have what feel like fatty lumps on my ribs, both sides may I add but still 'lumps' (so still scary!) and one of my boobs suddenly looking funny (the part near the chestbone seems to dip in, other side does it a little, has it always been like this or am I just being silly because this is recently one of my worries and am too scared to ask my fiance "have they always looked like this"? One thing I will end on though is that HA is a HUGE issue and very, very scary. I was recently petrified for being referred for a pelvic and transvaginal ultrasound...yet I know the not knowing would have driven me even crazier. Such a vicious circle so I feel for each and every one of you xxxx
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I cannot believe the amount of people with this anxiety disorder. I thought I was alone and crazy. I visit the doctor at least once a month because of this. Every little pain I get is cancer. It doesn't help that almost every one of my family members that have passed away on my mother's side have died of cancer. I am convinced that I will as well. What I fear most is leaving my children. As I sit here typing this, I am thinking about the brain tumor I have because of the headache I've had for a week that will not go away! Living like this is horrible and well my medical bills are a whole other story. I would give anything to just be normal
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This is my story:
I was a normal 21 year old, married already and moved out with my wonderful husband.  Had NO worries in my life except for the minor stresses of work/college.  Then one day I was at work and had a very sharp pain in my chest (VERY obvious that something was wrong....I couldn't breath).  It turned out that it was a spontaneous collapsed lung.  I was in the hospital for an entire month...6 chest tubes and 2 surgeries. (Trying to sum it up).  And basically it was the WORST time of my entire life.  I honestly, honestly thought I was going to die in there.  When I was finally released, the anxiety hit.  Every ache, every pain, anything....and I was running to the doctor thinking that something else was wrong with me.  "what if, what if, what if!" ....I live every day in fear that my opposite lung is going to collapse as well...I was having very bad heart palpitations and assumed I had heart failure....I have lumps in my breast and now I think I have cancer.  It honestly is SO exhausting.  The depression, the FEAR of death and the unknown.  I wanted all of you to know that you are not alone! I tried counseling and basically when it comes down to it...YOU have to have the POWER in yourself to think more positively about life.  I know that the terrible thoughts of sickness and death keep coming...and when they come, try to replace them with positive things! Our problem is that our brains focus SO hard on the negative...that we don't see the positive.  MAKE yourself see the positive.  I have found from listening to my counselor and from reading many thing online that you honestly have to work at this.  It's not like you will just wake up one day and your mind won't be running a marathon saying you have cancer, you have heart failure, you're DYING.  You have to tell your brain WHO is BOSS.  I know it is extremely difficult to change the way that you think...trust me I know...but you have to weigh the pros/cons.  If you live your life in constant fear of death....are you really living?  
Find your purpose...meditate...be kind...smile when you don't want to...have faith...focus on the positive...and LIVE the life you have.
Best Wishes
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I know this thread is old but it looks like there have been some recent comments. I've always felt so alone with my health anxiety but I'm happy to see so many others that I can relate to. I am sorry though that so many of you are going through this horrible horrible problem. I can remember all the way back to when I was a kid that I had health anxiety. I can remember all of the time asking my parents if I was going to have a heart attack and die. I don't know where or why I even thought of that but I did. As a teenager I can remember feeling like I couldn't breathe and I begged my mom to take me to ER. She did and absolutely nothing was wrong with me but I still couldn't shake the feeling of something being wrong. As an adult (I'm 28 now) my anxiety has gotten even worse. I have gone through so many diseases/cancer. It's not even funny. Brain tumor, colon cancer, breast cancer, melanoma, etc. etc. I hate this. Currently I'm scared that I have melanoma even though I just went to the dermatologist 1 month ago. She found nothing wrong but in my mind I just know she had to of missed this spot on my chest that I think looks weird. My husband constantly reassures me that she didn't miss looking at this spot and if it was something to worry about that she would have wanted to biopsy it. Even though his reassurance helps for maybe 10 minutes after that 10 minutes I'm right back to worrying. And now I have a small red spot on my chest and forearm. They weren't there when I went to the dr so I of course think these are also melanoma. When my brain actually works right and I can think realistically I know that they are probably just dry spots but I can't shake the feeling of it being melanoma. I have a husband and 3 small kids and my health anxiety scares me more than anything. I do not want to leave my kids or husband behind. I know one day that I will die and I'm okay with that fact but I just want to be in my 70's or 80's. I want to see my kids grow up and I want to have time to spend with my husband after the kids have left the house.
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I understand your fear and I am sorry that you are going through this. Fear is a horrible beast especially when your own mind lets it out of the cage. I've have had this phoiba for a over a year know. I have been to the emergency room 3 times and had bloodwork and scans, I have seen 3 specialists and all have confirmed that I do not have any life-threatening illness like cancer or any close to it. I hope you can beat this. I hope that we can beat it. I have two young children and I have found that most people including myself do not fear death per se but do fear not seeing their precious little ones grow up. We fear not getting to share our short amount of time with loved ones, husbands, wifes, mothers, fathers, etc. These are truly my greatest fears outside the thought of cancer itself. I am there with you and you are not alone. This is not the only thread out there if you need to talk to someone. I know it may be old and I simply stumbled upon it trying to figure out whats wrong with me but keep looking for help. I'ts out there and people do care.
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It's been very encouraging to read everyone's story on here and know I am not alone. I have been battling this for three months now as I went through some health scares. I am now seeing my second therapist. My subconscious mind now feels like my enemy, always sending me signals of impending doom and just "wrongness" in my body. I know I am physically fine but this just won't go away. I may have several hours that feel almost normal but then the rest of the day I feel this ill feeling, every day. It is such a struggle to try to control my brain, when before it was natural and I didn't even think about these things. I often just want to cry or rage at the universe for putting me through this, but I try my best to focus on the positive that one day I will get through this!
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Wow, all this sounds so familiar, it's scary and makes me feel crazy. My mom had breast and ovarian cancer and her mom had breast cancer, her sister had ovarian cancer and my dad had brain cancer... So let's just say I've been paranoid since I was in my 20's... My cousin passed away 2 years ago from ovarian cancer and never even knew she had it, she was gone in 1 week. My aunt ( my moms other sister) passed away from colon cancer last year also..
Soooo... I had the braca testing done and it was negative that I don't have the gene but I went ahead and had my uterus and ovaries taken out anyway last year because I was convinces I had ovarian cancer but it was just a large fibroid... Ugh, it's horrible to go through life this way. I'm now convinced I have colon cancer and a brain tumor !, what is wrong with me??!!!
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Holy C**P!  I am relieved that I am not the only one.  That is the typical response I have seen so far and I don't know if I should feel good or what???  But let me tell you, I had a little rear exit issue with too much blood.  I went to urgent care a couple of years ago to address it and it was confirmed...Hems!  But the doc wanted a sigmoidoscopy done...I dismissed it and went on my way.  Come in to 2015 and that's where things hit the fan and my anxiety heats up.  I have a bad case of vertigo.  Freaked, I immediately schedule a doc appointment and physical.  Well, vertigo was caused by a fantastic middle ear infection.  Nothing really fascinating there.  My physical turns out normal except for my iron levels.  They are incredibly low.  Well, my earlier issue was never fully resolved.  So, my doc now concerned orders me to do a full colonoscopy.  He says in such a way, he wants to rule out Colon Cancer.  Whoa boy...my wheels are spinning now.  I was a nervous wreck up until the day of.  GI doc was more comforting...told me since I've had this for a couple of years now (actually like 3+years) I would have known by now if it was something serious.  That put me at ease as the anesthesia was kicking in and I could feel the apparatus going up my rear.  Minutes later, I am woken up to a clean bill of health!  I am elated!  I feel like I have a new lease on life...UNTIL I get a call from my doctor 3 weeks later.  He is still concerned about my iron levels.  He can't believe hem bleeding can cause that much iron to be lost.   This is where a) I take another tail spin and b) kinda lose faith in my doc.  I have to remind him that this has been going on for years, not days, not weeks.  Suffice it to say, I'm freaked again.  So much so that in the coming months my chest starts to hurt.  I feel that I am not breathing normal.  I finally go to urgent care.  They hook me up and the whole 9 yards.  Doc listens to my breathing, apparently everything is clear.  I flat out ask...is it Lung Cancer.  Doc apologizes and says no, "I should have stated that at the beginning."  "You're fine, people your age (I'm 35) come in all the time with this..anxiety.  Go home and enjoy your life, your kids (I have 2)."  However, before that, it was noticed that my EKG showed a little abnormal heartbeat.  So, I go in for a full on stress test.  That..comes out normal!  So I'm normal!  BUT no matter how many times I try to convince myself I'm good...I'm constantly worrying.  I have aches on my side that feel like and probably are just muscle sores.  I have a really bad bed.  But...I'm convincing myself that I have cancer...all thanks to Dr. Google!!!   Do I go to the doctor for something as foolish as this?  I probably will end up going...then feel better for like 15 minutes and then worry about something else.  I hate HATE HATE this feeling.  I can't shake it!  It all stems from my damn colonoscopy when my Doc told me he wanted to rule out Colon Cancer....What he could have said was...I would like to see what's going on...not..Let's rule out Cancer.  I think Doctors forget how hearing that word "cancer" can affect someones daily life...even if it's and "if".....This forum has shown me that I'm not alone...and whoever reads this...You are not alone.  
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Hi,
Same here, i get a lill pain, worry (think its cancer ) google , get scared, google more, at some point i have enough courage to go to the doctor, they litterally laugh at me, get tested, everything fine, i feel awesome, until i figure out a new cancer, dont get sucked up in that, i missed my kids growing their first years, because all i did is googling symptoms, and survival chances for something i dont have, both my family sides are cancer free, became very old, but its still in my mind, i am muslim, and in my religion we say ; god will take your soul at a pre-determined date and time, so whatever u do , you will die at that point of time ONLY" that helps i guess.
Guys i ve been to about 15 doctors this year, before 1-3 every two years! Blood work, xrays, tubes down my nose n theoat, all that crap!
January 2015 i started feeling dizzy out of nowhere! A whole freaking week non stop, it was a hirrible experience, evey test u did came back normal! Until my wife bought me a plane ticket to go visit family, and it was all gone !!!! Everyone was saying its psychological and i didnt wanna admit it! Guys i wish u the best believe me i know 2 or 3 persons from my friends who have the same thing! You are not weird , you are okay!
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Wow!!! Me, me, me!
Same fears! Symptoms! All me! I'm so tired of this feeling....
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I can;t believe how familiar this all sounds. And it is reassuring that I am not the only one who thinks this way. For me it all started around when I was 11. My older sister had a boyfriend who was battling cancer. He was going through chemo so he had lost all his hair. Not understanding why when very little of my hair would come out in the tub I thought I had cancer too and was dying. Through the years it would come and go. High school my health anxiety went through the roof. I thought I had a brain tumour. My mother had to take me to the emergency room because I thought I was dying. Early 20's it wasn't so bad. Then I had my first chid. After he was born it started back up. Not only did I fear health problems for myself but now also my son! I have a young daughter now too and my fears are worse then ever. If my children are sick with the flu I feel they need to get blood work done and the whole nine yards. I'm constantly in fear I have any form of cancer and it will go undeteched and I will be left with very few weeks to live by the time I am diagnosed! This is no way to live. Always in fear, day in and day out. I have had  cat scans done to rule out brain tumours, but now for whatever reason I fear throat cancer. Has any one found a way to help this anxiety?!
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This is my story. Three weeks ago I was normal and healthy, running daily, enjoying life, filledc with joy and energy. Then I had a particularly nasty spell of IBS after a very hectic week/weekend at work. One thing led to another, and I convinced myself that I'm dying of colon cancer. So, off to my doctor. Then the specialist. Now I'm waiting for a colonoscopy which will happen in a week. As I wait, my fears increase. Every abnormal bowel movement, every ache and pain, every odd sensation confirms my self-diagnosis of colon cancer.
And then there's the weight loss. I'm convinced that I'm losing weight. Daily. I wake up every morning in a panic and look in the mirror, inspecting my body for signs of weight loss. Of course, I find them. I've had my husband hide the scale and tape measure because I was weighing and measuring mtself 20 times a day. Every fluctuation of the scale would throw me into a full-blown panic.

So, that's where I am. Obsessing about colon cancer. Believing I'm sick. Not able to sleep. My life as it once was is gone. I'm hoping the colonoscopy will turn things around. Of course, if the results are good. I have myself convinced that I have it, so I'm fully expecting very bad results.

Health anxiety/hypochondria is nothing new to me. I've been suffering from it, with varying levels of severity, for 30+ years. This recent episode is by far the worst.
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Everything you said. I do the same. I convinced myself I have cancer cause I have some weight loss. I stepped on the scale and it would scare the hell out of me. Everyday I wake up and constantly worry about cancer and look at myself in the mirror for signs of weight loss.
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I am going throuh the exact same feelings every pain is Cancer and weigh  myself 10 times  a day
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I am suffering too with this health anxiety condition. Started last november when I had a bad reflux and chest pain. Thanks to Dr.Google for ruining so many lifes by suggesting that I might have esophagus cancer. Drop 7kgs in one month because of the anxiety. The worst thing is that people around me keeps on telling me I Iost weight. That simple words makes me panic and keeps me nuts. The day came when I had an endoscopy to rule out my fear. It came out I had a small hiatal hernia popping to my stomach which is causing my reflux. I became very depress and anxious thinking that i might need to undergo surgery and to take the PPi medications for the rest of my life. Lists of sickness i am thinking i have continues. Last week, i hit my testes accidentally causing it to hurt.Next morning when i peed, it was of burning sensation so i consulted Dr. google again and yes you guessed  it right. Dr google said i migt have prostate cancer. And the thought of it keeps me awake and sometimes waking up sweaty and fast palpitations
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I am so scared right now.  I dont know if I have anxiety or what, but I am afraid I have either Lung or Pancreatic cancer.  Back in Oct I ended up in the emergency room with the worst headache of my life.  Dr
s ran all tests (chest x-ray, head CT, blood work, you name it)  Everything was clear, except they said I had a sinus infection and bronchitis and put me on antibiotics.  for the next couple months I had reoccuring symptoms and ended up in at urgent care twice on Xmas week.  After that I got to feeling better and back to my self for a few weeks.  Now in the last 2 or 3 weeks I started having stomach issues with back pain... I am so scared as everthing I read on the internet points towards pancreatic cancer or lung cancer.  I have a appointment with my GP on Monday.  For the last week I constantly dwell on this to the point that I start shaking and getting sweaty palms... its all I can think about at this point and I am so scared as I am married with children and the thought of leaving them is overwhelming.  This morning I had to leave the house just to go out and drive around and started crying while I was driving and then went to a church and prayed.  For the last week all I do at work is search the internet all day and read about this..   God please help me... I am so scared.

Bret
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Did you ever find out what this was I feel the same way
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Just wondering how you are doing nowadays? Your story totally relates to mine. Especially with your dad. My dad passed of Esophagus  cancer in 2008, and every since then everything that changes on me is now cancer. I acted a lot like my ad and  our genes are very much the same, so I always have this in the back of my head. I just keep trying to catch it early. Please let me know if you ever got over this anxiety and if so how?
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I hope someone can help me through the same thing. Seeing my Dad and Brother pass away before my eyes when I was little I have been scared of how quickly someone can go. I had a lump under my arm and straight away thought Cancer shaking and panicking in the Docs to find out it was just a blocked pore. Now I have found small lump in my gum. Straight away Jaw Cancer/Oral Cancer. To scared to search symptoms and have gotten to the point of just breaking down and not being able to cope with the fear anymore. Im going to Docs tomorrow but im so scared to find out whether its bad or not. I just cant deal with the heartache anymore. Im only 22 and have been scared of my own health since I was 11. Wish I crawl out of the black hole Im in.
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It's hell. I have had ocd since the time I was born diagnosed at age 12 and the fears control my life. I have four kids and sadly I passed ocd to my oldest son he is fearful and worried has anxiety and it kills me I know his pain. I freak out think I have cancer shaking, fearing, it's taken over my life. I have to force myself to try and get over it. I had my youngest 5 years ago and my gall bladder removed after she was born. I have had blood test, endoscopeso, EUS, scans. Ct scans, but the fear of cancer still lays in the back of my mind. You know your ok but that voice inside you says otherwise. You feel stupid telling people because unless u have lived it you don't understand what kind of hell it truly is.I just want relieve I just want to stop suffering from this I hate that part of myself.my biggest fear is leaving my husband and kids behind and dying not watching them grow and watch them experience life. I know I have no control over when I die and how I die but at 32 I am not ready and the fear controls me. I have to prevent myself from expensive er visits and such. Overcoming it is hard you need support from those who understand seeing all your post helps you don't feel alone or judged you just feel support. OCD is a illness that gets over looked you can't place it with other things we all deserve the right to be worry free to feel safe and enjoy our lives someone needs to help us cure OCD because the pain and hurt and suffering it causes is about as bad as cancer or other illnesses it affects your whole body. You get sick, lose weight, spend so much time and money for doctors, your quality of life is compromised. And you can't overcome on your own. More people need to understand what we are feeling isn't stupid or odd to us it is real, to us it can happen to us it is hell
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I seriously  have the same Cancer fear. Googling my symptoms is seriosuly my enemy:(
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