Aa
Is my spouse bipolar?
He gets upset over little things, he's constantly focused on one thing for a month then bounces to another, has visions of grandeur (seriously thinks he's the smartest person ever), tells me every thing I do wrong like if I don't load the dishwasher to his standard or leave a small amount of baby formula dust on the counter. He's driven away my parents and has little contact with his. Threatens suicide if I ever leave.
It's crazy but I'm not sure if bipolar. Still he doesn't think he has a problem and says he wouldn't trust a doctor to diagnose him. He also fills our house with "stuff to protect us from the bad guys" and constantly quizzes me about where they are hidden and their use. He came home the other day with military grade mace and 3Med it to my front door. Seriously.
Am I overreacting? I don't know what to do. We have a 2.5 year old and a 6 month old. He has some mild violent tendencies, which I do try to keep in check if I see them. He will sometimes grab my DDs face with one hand and squeezes her cheeks to get her to look at him but we've agreed now he should use two hands to gently bring her face to his. But still I worry that as he gets older and they get older it could get worse. He also used to grab her up and shove her into the couch when she misbehaved. She's never said Oww mind you, but I still don't think that's the way to discipline. Thinks I'm a pushover cause I put her in time out on her bed.
Sorry for the rant but I just don't know what to do with him. I've threatened to leave if he doesn't get treatment but he told me the government would take our kids from us if I sent him to a psychiatrist because he said the only way he would go would be if I got questioned too. Then he told me if he got a positive diagnosis it wouldn't matter because they obviously wouldn't know what they were talking about so he wouldn't take treatment. Ugh.
He's also abusive to our two dogs. He picks them up by the scruff of their neck and slides them across the floor or hams their head into the wall. The oldest dog now acts psychotic from all this. Constantly scared, barks at nothing, etc. The younger one has bit me twice recently for running around the house.
He also obsesses over everything our daughter does. She can't say doggie...it has to be dog. She's 2 for goodness sake! He doesn't like her playing with dolls, she can't sleep with a doll or nightlight or sound machine.
His dad was abusive to him and his 4 siblings. But he says he's nothing like him. He's never hurt me physically except for grabbing my wrist hard a few times. I had small bruising in two spots. But when we argue he will slam doors, throw remotes, etc.
I'm going to start counseling by myself to lay the groundwork then hopefully bring him in and get a diagnosis. Then proceed to a psychiatrist for meds for him hopefully.
It's crazy but I'm not sure if bipolar. Still he doesn't think he has a problem and says he wouldn't trust a doctor to diagnose him. He also fills our house with "stuff to protect us from the bad guys" and constantly quizzes me about where they are hidden and their use. He came home the other day with military grade mace and 3Med it to my front door. Seriously.
Am I overreacting? I don't know what to do. We have a 2.5 year old and a 6 month old. He has some mild violent tendencies, which I do try to keep in check if I see them. He will sometimes grab my DDs face with one hand and squeezes her cheeks to get her to look at him but we've agreed now he should use two hands to gently bring her face to his. But still I worry that as he gets older and they get older it could get worse. He also used to grab her up and shove her into the couch when she misbehaved. She's never said Oww mind you, but I still don't think that's the way to discipline. Thinks I'm a pushover cause I put her in time out on her bed.
Sorry for the rant but I just don't know what to do with him. I've threatened to leave if he doesn't get treatment but he told me the government would take our kids from us if I sent him to a psychiatrist because he said the only way he would go would be if I got questioned too. Then he told me if he got a positive diagnosis it wouldn't matter because they obviously wouldn't know what they were talking about so he wouldn't take treatment. Ugh.
He's also abusive to our two dogs. He picks them up by the scruff of their neck and slides them across the floor or hams their head into the wall. The oldest dog now acts psychotic from all this. Constantly scared, barks at nothing, etc. The younger one has bit me twice recently for running around the house.
He also obsesses over everything our daughter does. She can't say doggie...it has to be dog. She's 2 for goodness sake! He doesn't like her playing with dolls, she can't sleep with a doll or nightlight or sound machine.
His dad was abusive to him and his 4 siblings. But he says he's nothing like him. He's never hurt me physically except for grabbing my wrist hard a few times. I had small bruising in two spots. But when we argue he will slam doors, throw remotes, etc.
I'm going to start counseling by myself to lay the groundwork then hopefully bring him in and get a diagnosis. Then proceed to a psychiatrist for meds for him hopefully.
You don't sound safe to me. Just reading everything you wrote scared me! I wouldn't want to have my children tossed or grabbed in any which way. Let alone be afraid for them as they got older...
Those are your red flags! Your children.
All that stuff he's buying for protection against others doesn't sound age at all. He could use all that stuff against you and the children if he snaps. I hope you find a way out for your children sake. :)
Those are your red flags! Your children.
All that stuff he's buying for protection against others doesn't sound age at all. He could use all that stuff against you and the children if he snaps. I hope you find a way out for your children sake. :)
There sounds like a bipolar aspect to it. Just remember that manic episodes can only be identified through time. Chart his mood. Someone can start very happy "euphoric" for a time and then as the mania increases his mood can turn aggressive. The person will feel everything is great and so will others but then give it some time and it will fall either into major major depression or psychosis. Keep in mind, there are daily mood swings or outbursts of anger and this does not mean bipolar. However, many of us have conditions on top of bipolar. In his case it strongly suggest to me to see into borderline personality disorder. Bipolar is treated with drugs and then therapy. Borderline is treated with therapy. He will need to be put on a mood stabilizer and antipsychotics if he is in agreement. If he puts his kids, or you at risk the law needs to be involved. If he puts himself at risk then you should call the cops and force hospitalization. Thats where he can be treated with the correct medications.
I really want to tell you to take your dogs and kids and get out of there and go to your parents house until he gets help. I don't know how you'd feel about that though. He just seems really abusive. And scary.
You don't sound like you're over reacting. He sounds paranoid, violent and scary! I got chills reading your post. Has he always been this way?
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