8 year old social development

[DiaperBagDiva]

I have an 8 year old daughter.  She is in second grade.  She gets straight A's and has never been in trouble in school.  

I'm concerned about her social development.  The thing that catches my attention most is her behavior towards strangers.  She always prefers strangers over people she knows.  She is also, overly friendly towards adults, especially men.  If a man speaks to her she will not leave him alone after that.  Ignoring other kids or competing with them, even his own children, to get his attention.  

She also makes people uncomfortable with touching. Not in a sexual way, just in a personal space way.  Again, it is most obvious with grown men, I guess because they are the most uncomfortable with it.  But even with kids her own age.  She will hug someone she just met, and it's clear they don't want to be hugged.  She even makes me uncomfortable sometimes with her touching.  

She doesn't have any close friends. We have tons of kids in our neighborhood but she doesn't seem interested in playing with them.   She is very bossy when she is playing with other kids.  

A couple more things...

She seems to have trouble understanding how things relate to one another.  

She is still sucking her thumb at night, and would do it during the day until recently.  The only reason she stopped during the day is because she started twirling her hair instead.

She just doesn't seem to want to grow up.  She says she wishes she was still a baby.  She often says how she wishes she could go back to kindergarten or how better her 3 year old brother has it.  She loves it when you do stuff for her, even if she is perfectly able to do it herself.  For example, her grandma still gives her baths, like a little baby.  And she loves it.  

One last thing, her physical strength is very low.  She is uncoordinated.  Her run is awkward and slow.

Am I making too much of this stuff?  Or do you think something could be wrong?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

No, it's not that you are making too much of it, but it's not entirely clear what is going on. I would arrange an evaluation with a pediatric mental health clinician. She may also require an Occupational Therapy evaluation to check for Sensory Integration problems. And check with her pediatrician about the muscle weakness - this, too, might require follow-up.