I hate myself!!!!

Posted By Jodie on April 22, 1999 at 23:54:34
I don't know where to begin.... Well I have had a problem with bulimia and annorexia (anorexia) over the last 13 years( on and off) I have been in and out of the hospital so many times  but jan 98 i was admitted in the hospital for annorexia (anorexia)  and when i got out  I wanted to change my life and not do this anymore...well  it went good for a bit  then  i started to feel bad about myself again  and I started bulimia just 3 times a week  normally everyday all day long  or I just would'nt eat!3 times a week was good!  well anyways I stopped that again  then in november I freaked out in walmart  and I felt like I was going to die   they said I had panic disorder also....so they took test after test  now they knew of my condition  and i was being good on eating and so on.. and they put me on medication Paxil,Ativan,Xanax.....I started to gain alot of weight.... now  this is really getting to me  but i dont want to go through my vicious cycle of not eating again  I just want a healthy body and to be thin  I'm not eating fatty foods    does paxil do this to you!  I feel like sometimes  just ending my life!  I hat the way I look  and I just hate myself!  I can't take this anymore!!!!!  Some please help me!










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Re: I hate myself!!!! HFHS.MD.D.E. 4/27/1999
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Re: I hate myself!!!! Karen 4/24/1999
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