mom in law

[JRG]

Hi everyone:
My mom in law has been in the hospital for a week with multiple problems. She has congestive heart failure and severe regurgitiation of the mitral, aortic, and tricuspid valves. The heart surgeon has told us she is not a candidate for surgery. She has also had diabetes for about 42 years and is insulin dependant. She is 76 years old and about to have to return to a skilled care unit which she hates. The other alternative is hospice. The doctor has expressed his belief that she is not long for this world but for some reason doctors don't like to admit someone to a hospice unit. I think she would be much more comfortable there. My question is does anyone have any idea when someone is in this condition how much longer they can hold on and how hard should I push the doctor.

Thank you!
Jackie

[Tarheelguy1967]

Best of luck with your situation.  I hope you are able to make arrangements for your mother-in-law to ensure she gets the best care in the best situation.  How is your husband doing - and what are his thoughts?

[viennaustria]

Thank you sis. ! :)

[JRG]

I am so glad that you were able to do what you thought was right. These are different circumstances though. I don't know if you have ever cared for someone in the condition like she is in. My sister in law died of cancer but she was mobile until the last week of her life and able to get around. The last week we had to lift her and clean her etc. but she only weighed 140. She also had her right mind. She died at home. It was the right decision for her. I don't know why you cannot grasp that there are circumstances where a skilled care is more humane and better than struggling at home and causing damage to the person. I hope you never find yourself in the situation I am in with a loved one in this condition.
God Bless
Jackie

[pvcqueen]

i am proud of you, sis

[pvcqueen]

nice to see you again....did you say hi to jack?

[viennaustria]

When I went home to take care of my mother ,I had a husband who just lost his job, 2 teenager ,a dog and the best job I ever had. I took all the money I had.

When came back , I got  my job back, soon I got an other job too. My husband got 2 jobs by then, my kids learned how to take care of themselves and how to earn money in part time and from their hobbies.

I had  open window  airplane tickets for one  year. I came back less then 3 months.

She had cancer and died in a happy setting in her own apartment with smile on her face !