I am falling....for the wrong person???

[alvaa]

Ok, first off, I am so glad that there is a relationship forum here. I did not realize that until now. I am a clinically depressed person with anxiety disorder. I am a "family values republican"....whatever that means.

I got divorced in 2007. I have a beautiful 7 year old daughter. I met a girl through school activities. She is 32 (I am 40) and at first I never thought anything about her. She was some woman with 4 kids. She also has tattoos which do not turn me on. The more I got to know her and her personality, the more I liked her. We joined on facebook and it got even more dramatic. She had issues, she had enemies. She has people busting out her car windows and stuff. She is very opposite than me. She has 4 kids from 3 men, one was an affair. She lived with a black man for a while (Let me get back to this). I found out stuff about her because I know the people she works for. She got pregnant in high school. I adore her! I adore her kids. They seem to like me. She asked me out and I am scared. The fact that she live with a black guy does not bother me at all but with the exception that I cannot "measure up" so to speak. I am not even above average for a white guy. She has all of this baggage but I would do anything for her. She is so awesome. I don't want to get hurt but I do not want to hurt her either. Can anyone give me some advice?

[alvaa]

I think I am going to wash my hands of this. I have read everything. I have heard my friends, coworkers, and the few of my family who object.

[TTinKKerBBell]

There has been a lot more expressed here outside of Your text, her text, text, text text.........  
You suffer selective hearing (You hear only the bits and pieces You want to hear).  There have been numerous, valid concerns expressed that You ignore.  You should go back to the beginning, re-read everything You wrote, re-read everyone's input, post by post.

[alvaa]

Thank you. I know. It's only been since last March since I went out. I dated a (too young for me) 23 yr old girl. I never had this problem with her. We dated off and on for about 2 years.

[specialmom]

She said it to a coworker that reported back to you. I don't know why she said it and maybe she doesn't mind you texting but you are way too invested in this right now.  You are going to crash if you get anymore involved and she rejects you.

Maybe she has a cheap wal mart phone----------  but you really need to slow yourself down.  I'm guessing you haven't dated in a long time?  

I'm really going to say again that you are thinking about this way too much and maybe even obsessing a bit.  I think your anxiety disorder is playing a signficant role here.  

[alvaa]

Well, if she didn't want me to text her why would she say something to the effect, "he quit texting me"?

[specialmom]

Oh boy, well, that was detailed.  Here is the thing-------  she's a mom of FOUR kids, works, has a house, etc.  Two hours of texting . . . yeesh.  Anyway, I'm dead serious when I tell you that I feel you need to slow yourself down here.  Whether she got the text or not.  This is a bit much early on and your attachment at this point is worrisome.  

You are seriously going a bit overboard with something that is new.  Whether you were friends or not, you were NOT dating and have only had one date.  And you should make it clear within your own self that this woman is going to be pretty busy.  She's got a lot on her plate.  And ya know, she really could just be saying that to the coworker that YOU know and gets back to you with a full report.  (intrusive and would bug me if i were her).  

good luck