my husband stalked someone in the family before he knew me - I dont want to go to family functions am i asking to much?

[mommysgirl123]

My husband of five years stalked someone before he met me (which is also my sister in laws sister) I did not think much of it as this person (Stepnine) Has moved to another state but now she is back in town and I think staying.  I asked my husband not to hang out at his brothers house as that may be where she is spending some time he kinda agreed telling me that he would walk out if she showed up-I don't believe he would.

The person that came to me and told me all this stuff was my sister in law and then a week later she came to my house with her sister in the car-- I told my husband to ask her not to bring her over he agreed after awhile. I don't talk to my sister in lawmuch anymore I do not understand why she would tell me that he was stalking her then she brings her to my house a couple weeks later.  

When he stalked her he called her 10 times a day, drove past her house a couple times a day, bought her clothing or underwear and was still paying her cell phone when I met him-(she would not return the phone-- was his reason for paying her bill)

She was about to call the police when he was doing this-- is what I was told by my sister in law so it must have gotton very weird.  

Should I trust this person? I just cannot get over the fact that he stalked someone- He and I broke up 2 times he never came running to even get back together or anything I tell him that I think he liked her a lot more and he says he learned not to chase a women that they will come back to him if is meant to be -- it does not make sense that he does not even show me that he wants this relationship that badly.

What do you think??

Would you trust this person?
  

[jo929]

I think there is more to this post, than what is being said , also it-does not sound just right to me, no one puts up with stalking, and accepts gifts at the same time, and no I would not trust him    jo

[cowgirlnerd]

For real - this is a little creepy.  It's like if you married a murderer  - would you be worried because they didn't try to murder you???    

Maybe it was taken out of context, but I can't imagine this whole scenario.    Therapy - lots and lots of therapy........

[AHP84]

I think the stalked woman was the poster's husband's brother's wife's sister.

Anyway, I agree..this is confusing to follow and creepy.
Would I trust the husband? No, and I don't know why you married him if you knew about the stalking beforehand. Did it not bother you when you met him that he stalked someone for 5 years and was still doing so (paying her phone bill, which is also confusing--what the heck, did she want to be stalked just to have a free phone)?

[woozy]

Your sister in law's sister would also be your sister in law and your husband's sister. So he was stalking his own sister?

I will assume you didn't mean to paint that picture.
And you met him while it was still going on? I'd be asking myself why I got involved with someone who was in the midst of stalking/harassing someone else in the first place.
Stalking usually is because of unrequited obsession. I bet if you blew him off for good he just might stalk you also. Does that make you feel more appreciated? This is creepy on many different levels. I would go to a good counselor. The issues you need to address are your own.