vaginal fistulars

[hefferj]

How do I stop being and enabler for my alcholic husband although I don't have to supply him the means by which he's able to have his feel of alcohol I feel that some how it's part my fault because I stayed with him though his marijunana addiction and now he expects me to see it through with him for his excessive drinking because he's had a bout with cancer beat it and now he's a drunk and I' about to bolt cause my dad was an alcoholic and I have 32 years of soberity under my belt which I intend to keep no matter what with Jehovah's God's help.

[Jaybay]

Hefferj, it's all about what you're willing to live with. Nobody is forcing you to stay in this terrible situation.  Are you staying with him out of guilt?  Emotional blackmail on his part?  Some sense of loyalty?  

You can't fix his addiction disease, but you can choose to stay sober.  From your remarks you know very well that environment plays a big part in sobriety or relapse.  You know it's a bad environment for you or you wouldn't be here.  Somehow you need to find the strength to save yourself.  Perhaps by getting away from him for a time, your husband will finally learn to stand on his own two feet and look at his problem squarely in the face.  

You don't have to live like this.  Never forget that you DO have a choice.  Your husband has a choice too, but you can't make it for him.

[OGmacdaddy]

Hi HefferJ,
Well I am sorry you are in this situation.  I can only give you my perspective.  I have seen many women who told me their boyfriends were drug addicts, alcoholics, or something bad.  I'm a good man, I treat women nice and respectful, I don't drink, smoke etc, but women usually pick these other types over me.  Now when they get almost killed or something real bad then they like me, Anyway...Apparently nice guys are boring.  So I'm sure there is some nice guy around(like me) who would love you to death, but you might consider him boring.  Leave the addictive guy who values a "High" over you before you get too old.  he'll be dead or in prison soon, then you will consider a "nice guy" and it will be too late.  Nice guys have money too, they don't drink it all away.  Seperate, date a man with a job, house, and no habits.  They are all around looking for a woman to love.