6 Days CLEAN of Percocet 10/325

[KMK523]

I would like to start by saying I think this forum is wonderful! I have read many posts this past week, and find a little comfort knowing I am not alone! I am a 34 year old mother of 3 amazing kids that need their mom back. My story starts like many others that I have read on this page....I had back surgery 13 years ago and was prescribed percocet for the pain. Over the years I have become more and more dependant on the pills and have drastically increased my dose. TODAY I AM 6 DAYS CLEAN COLD TURKEY METHOD!!! I am proud, but realize I have a long road ahead of me. Before I stopped taking the pills I was up to 16 10/325's each day. The physical withdraw was pure HELL, but I made it through. I must also add the pills have always been prescribed to me from my family physician...240 per month. I have never purchased illegally EVER!!! My question is this......I have good days and I have bad days. Bad days are pure HELL. I feel exhausted, bad headaches, diahreah, and plain SAD. When will this get easier?? Right now the only support I have is my husband. He is great, but can not relate to what I am going through. I am afraid to dare talk to anyone, or even attend a meeting because I know a lot of people and I fear being recognized by someone. No one knows that I have this problem (at least I don't think anyone knows). Any advice would be appreciated....first time poster. Thank you all for listening!!

[Sonrissa]

Hi KMK, welcome to the family! Congrats on 6 days clean! I am 5 days today, and it certainly has been hell! I think the physical symptoms will go on for another few days or so, but to a somewhat lesser degree! It's the mental stuff that's gonna take some big time to get through! I want to wish you luck! Please post anytime, as you've been reading, lots of wonderful folks are here to answer any questions and offer support! Best wishes!

[KMK523]

Hello Sonrissa...thank you for the reply and encouraging words! I must say it put a smile on my face. It is so nice to finally be able to discuss my problems. I must also congratulate you on 5 DAYS CLEAN!!!!! It is a difficult thing to do. I NEVER would haven thought I would be able to function off of percs, but so far I am. I think a lot about wanting/needing to take them, but I know I would just be disappointed with myself. This is the hardest thing that I will ever do, not even child birth compares to this hell I am in. One day at a time, right??  Thank you again for your response......good luck to you!!!

[Sonrissa]

You got that right, it's the hardest thing ever! It's a little slow around here cause holiday weekend! Be a little patient and you will get lots of support! Most people off doing stuff! Me, just trying to get through day 5! Still feeling kinda weak and pukey! Also a good sense of humor helps a lot! Take care!!

[littlebit667]

Good for you!  What are you taking for the pain (OTC) and withdrawals??

There are some OTC things that will help.  The days will get better, but  be kind to yourself.  Don't try to be supermom just yet.  Give yourself at least another week or so to start feeling a lot better.  

[KMK523]

Thanks littlebit!! I am not taking anything over the counter for the withdraws other than Imodium and Advil for the headaches. Do you have any suggestions? At this point I just want to feel better...physically and emotionally. My sleep has been awful too...I am averaging about 4 hours per night. Will that get better? I had the long weekend off from work. That was a blessing in disguise. I go back to work today...today is day 7 clean for me. I just want to feel better...I can't believe I'm where I am. How did I allow this to happen? Thank you for your response :)

[littlebit667]

Some say Alteril works for sleep.  Sleepy time tea works for some.  Kava Stress Tea is sworn by by oldtimer here Gnarly.  2 Bags steeped with honey for anxiety (for sleep).  Benadryl for cold like symptoms and some say it helps with sleep.  Exercise helps if you can handle it for anxiety, sleep and overall clearing of toxins in body.  Sweat those toxins out.  Stay hydrated..very important to replace what you have lost stomach-wise.  You have to eat..proteins if possible.  Food=energy.  We are so used to letting the pills give us the energy we often don't eat like we should.  I had no appetite during the last of my pill taking.  It is back pretty much and I am having to relearn how to eat good foods again!  LOL

The next step is mental.  Our brains are still p i s s e d at us (so to speak) and will kick us in the butt with cravings.  Be vigilant and know that most cravings take about 7 minutes to go away.  Good work...keep it up!

Many would give their left arm for 4 hrs a night.  That is the reality of these damn devil pills!  I am still on and off.  I sleep, but wake after 4 hours..up a bit and then back down.  

If food is an issue..try protein rich boost or ensure.  Give liquids and energy.  

[minn66]

Just wanted to say hi, welcome, and congratulations! You've already been given some excellent information and advice. You show a lot of determination and discipline to be able to taper like that. Posting here has helped me so much, so do stick around.

Hugs,
Minn

[minn66]

Well, I can tell what kind of day I am going to have ;) I could have sworn I read that you tapered! Regardless, great job on 6 days, you should be feeling better bit by bit from now on.

Hugs,
Minn

[KMK523]

Thank you Minn!! I went cold turkey...I figured why prolong the inevitable. The support and information is amazing on this forum. It is really helping me knowing that you all are talking directly to me! Other than my hubby I have no one that I can relate with or talk to about this!! It's funny...I have exactly 121 pills in my medicine cabinet. I can't get rid of them...not yet anyway. On day 3 of being clean my husband wanted to get rid of them. I seriously freaked out. I won't touch them, but it's like they are a security blanket for me right now. I am keeping busy today. I am at work till 3:00, then sports with my daughter. Keeping busy definitly helps me (as long as I'm not home pittying myself). Thank you again for your kind words.

[minn66]

I did the same thing when I quit smoking. I kept a carton in the cabinet and said to myself that I chose not to smoke that day. After about 6 months I threw them away. I couldn't do that with the pills, though. If I had some, I would take them. At the very least, give them to hubby so you won't have easy access. Also, we love Flush Parties here, so when you do flush them I will flush in your honor ;)

[thewaz]

You have such strength!  And really... the worst of the physical is over.  I'm quite sure you still feel like a semi truck has had its way with you.  That takes time but you can help the process.  Push yourself a wee bit more each day.  A little physical activity.  No matter how simple or how hard.  Change your sheets.  Walk around the block.  Get your body moving and help those natural endorphins that have been laying dormant for so long start to kick back in.  Nourish yourself.  Not just liquids but protein.  If you're not ready to chow down yet, Ensure Boost is my savior.  I'm still taking it every morning because I was never a breakfast person preferring chasing my coffee with pills.  You are doing so great! Keep me updated.

[OpedOut]

Great Job, it is a living hell, and indescribably to anyone that has never gone through it!  Your almost there, seriously, I'd say another day or two you'll be back to square one physically.  Just have to be mindful of the mental withdrawal that lasts much longer, NA, or some other type of support group can make the difference between staying on the straight and narrow and not.  Hang in there and good luck!

[KMK523]

After I kick this I want to quit smoking next. One thing at a time!!! I don't know how I am able to keep them in the house without taking any. Honestly I almost did on Saturday...all I thought about was taking one. The reality for me was this---121 pills will last me maybe 7 days. Do I want that? When I woke up Sunday I felt great and was glad I didn't take any. I fought the urge. There was a time about a week ago that I didn't think I could go even 7 hours. 7 days is huge for me!!! Now that I am thinking more rationally I can't believe I'm not dead!!! 16 pills a day, not eating anything bc I wanted to take them on an empty tummy for better effects. I needed (or do I thought) just to wake up or do anything. That's the hardest part...my body is so out of whack! I want to change, but my body isn't making it easier. I never thought I had a problem...all these years bc my doc was prescribing them. What an *** I have been!!! Minn...how long have u been clean? What was your poison? Thanks:)

[minn66]

I took my last hydro on Friday, November 18, 2011, at 5AM. I was taking five to seven a day, toward the end mostly 6 or 7. I found this site on day 4 when I was (gulp) trying to make it though work. I managed to finish the day with the help of wonderful people here. Each day got a little bit better. Just hang in there and I know it sounds like a cliché, but take it one minute, hour, and day at a time.

Hugs,
Minn

[KMK523]

A little past 6 months clean...good for you!!!! That is awesome! I pray that I get there too! I am determined!!! You are right...this site is great!! I am fortunate to have found it. To everyone posting...I can't thank you all enough. It is very helpful and reassuring!!!!! I want this for me first and foremost!!!! Thanks again :)

[Dixiechick72]

Hi kmk welcome here!! I can't believe u made it through hell days alone (days 3-4)  I'm on day 9 sober. I was going to taper my pills but found this place and stop CT ... So great job on making it so far ... The waz had a great post from yesterday. If u didn't read that u should.  Most of us are secret detoxers in here!!!  It looks like u got all the advice u need so just wanted to offer my support and say good job and welcome to this awesome place!!!!!

[KMK523]

Hi Dixiechick....thank you!! This past weekend was big for me. I took my last pills last Tuesday. The weekend was my FIRST not taking any pills. Weekends were my favorite time to take pills! Getting through a long 3 day weekend without any wasn't easy. I made it though so I know there is hope!! We stayed home this weekend for that reason. Congrats on 9 days...how are you feeling mentally? I am noticing I have bad days every other day. Yesterday was horrible...today is great. Last week same thing. I have always been a huge coffee drinker. Since quitting percs I haven't been drinking too much of it. I'm starting to think that's where these crazy headaches are coming from!! Thanks for commenting...good luck to you also ;)

[thewaz]

I'm still smoking too. I figure if I could conquer this, I can handle the smoking, right?  I'm going to see my doc Friday for a suggestion on the best way. I want my body CLEAN.

[thewaz]

Thanks for the support of my post Dixie.  It was intended for all of us.  Today is day 18 for me.  Dixie and all my good friends got me here.  We've got you too.  Know that!

[thewaz]

Are you still holding these pills KMK?  Are they available to you?

[Dixiechick72]

Yes she still has them. Security blanket. But I'd still have Hubby put them away so u don't know where they are at. Some like the mental help and it seems to lesson the anxiety of knowing they are there. So I think when u get through ur rough patch have Hubby get rid of them. Ok. Best of luck to everyone. Waz... Still sitting on ur shoulder and I think I saw u on mine!!!;)

[KMK523]

Hello thewaz....I will be checking your post out tonight when I am home from work. It is hard to look it up on my phone. Thank you for your support and congrats to you also!!!! Yes I am still holding the pills. I can't seem to get rid of them. I have 121 to be exact!!! My husband tried to get rid of them on day 3....which was this past friday...I almost killed him!!! I need them in the house for that feeling of security. I know I should flush them but I can not bring myself to do it!!!! Like I said I will read your post tonight and let you know after I do so!!!! To everyone posting.....thank you thank you thank you!!! This is helping me a lot!! You are all BEAUTIFUL people!!!!!!!

[Bones216]

Hi kmk, I am also a newbie to this site, yesterday in fact. The love and support and encouragement is unlike any other I have ever experienced, almost spiritual. Your story is very similar to mine, with the exception of dosage was quite a bit heavier. I was hooked on norco usually 4 to 7 a day for chronic back pain. I'm a husband and father of two, good paying yet miserable job. I started taking painkillers as prescribed, but you know the story, I soon needed them for every occasion, and I'm embarrassed to say even for church. I came clean to my wife about everything, including the pills I'm sure you have stashed throughout the house. Very, very anxious times telling her about those. You have the support of your loving husband and three beautiful kids, and they want as want their mom back. In my humble opinion you have to get those pills out of the house. I always had good intentions of taking only three in a day and then I would have a bad day at work and then it was four, had to make dinner 5, energy to play with the kids 6, etc.... I don't trust myself and I don't think you trust yourself either because that is what these little devils do. I turned my relatively full prescription bottle over to my wife ugh! Again very anxious time. I've seen the posts from the was and he/she, told me you have to be 110% committed and I think the only way you can be is to get that temptation out of the house. It will be tough, but you can and will do this. Follow all of the extraordinary tips, and support this site offers. Keep posting, it's my new addiction, but makes the time go by. I wish you nothing but success, and will support you 110%.

[dominosarah]

Congrats on your clean time!!  You are doing great so keep it going.

Here's the deal with the pills in the house....You gotta get rid of them as they will be calling your name at some point.  Actually they will be screaming your name.  Let them go.  It is very empowering when you do.  Your mind knows you have them and it will start to play some heavy games with you.  You dont need or want them as they are nothing but a death sentence.  We love flushing parties here so do what is right here and get rid of them.  We want you to be successful~~sara