Aa
Check check in
Hi lovely MH peeps. Thought I would check in. Still no word on the surgery date which I am trying not to let drive me CRAZY! Haha. I'm at my busiest time of year as my student's year end show is next weekend. I am doing okay with the pain meds. I've managed to keep my dose pretty low. My lovely new GP and I signed an opiate contract and I am going in every two weeks to evaluate my pain. I find that if I stay in bed all day until I have to teach I can manage without meds until 8 or 9 at night. I am still swelling in my abdomen, lymph nodes still the size of golf balls in my groin, still bleeding from my bowel. I am going in for a sigmoidoscopy tomorrow and so I'm fasting. They are going to sedate me due to my inflammation and severe pain. Agh I just want this over. At least I have good medical support (finally) and great home support, and my support groups, and you lovely folks. I feel that I will be able to keep my dosage minimal until surgery and then have a good taper plan at the end because I will not have the luxury of c/t because I have to keep working this summer. It's hard, so hard, but I'm doing it and honestly, I'm proud of myself. I am a totally different woman than I was three years ago. About a week ago I had a bit of a meltdown when the pain was bad and told my mom how scared I was, both of the pain and the drugs. She told me she'd been watching me like a hawk and that I should not fear. Last time I was a victim. This time I am proactive. Just needed to share this.
xo
Lu
xo
Lu
Best Answer
Thinking of you Lu Lu. I know how awful it is to be that ill and still have no answers. You are a trooper, and you are holding up great girl. We are all here for you. I hope you get some answers and relief very soon. Please keep us updated, ok? Sending healing thoughts, and prayers your way.
Oh Lulu, im am thinking of you and definantly preying for you !!!
Your such a beautiful soul, lots of love to you my sweet friend xoxo
Your such a beautiful soul, lots of love to you my sweet friend xoxo
Had the scope. The prep was awful. Made me vomit, nearly pass out, and I am losing blood and mucous. They sedated me for the scope and the doc didn't find anything abnormal. On one hand this is good, on the other- still no answers as to why I am bleeding from my bowel. I am going to sleep now. I really really hope I get some answers soon.
Lu
Lu
Also wanted to add that I asked my boyfriend if he'd noticed a difference in me since taking the pain meds. He said that while my sense of humour isn't quite as quick in the evening, it is a relief to not watch me rolling around on the ground in agony and crawling to the toilet to puke from the pain. So maybe the pain meds are numbing me out a bit, but the suffering that gave me a twisted sense of humour was much, much worse. (:
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Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Im so glad you have friends and family support to talk to.
Your partner sounds amazing and must be going through pain with you.
Im going to do some research on this horrible disease so i can better understand it.
Its not nice being poked and prodded by doctors.
You remember to take whatever meds you have prescribed for your pain, this is legitimate pain remember and this doesnt count on your clean time.
You can worry about detoxing later, we know you are using them, not abusing them.
So you do what you have to do at the moment.
I can only imagine what you are going through and to be honest with you, you are the reason ive had 2 good days. When i heard how bad you were, i thought about you, compared myself and thought hey, im not sitting in a hospital bed suffering imense pain. Lulu is. And i picked myself up. All because of you.
I preyed for you again and will every morning and every night my beautiful Lulu.
We are all here to help you get through this tremendously tough time my sweet Angel
xoxo