Day 4 no Vicodin.. feeling somewhat better

[Lily977]

I slept 5 hours last night, the cloudy feeling seems to be better this morning.  Now if the back pain would go away. How long am going to feel this lack of energy?  It is a major effort to do anything!  Counting the days until I feel "normal" again.  I just want my life back.

[LeaAnn807]

About a week is the worst for the low energy.  Are you doing any supplements?  B vitamins?  Exercise?  Those all help.

[Jmoney84]

Hey Lily!

Grats on day 5, I'm so proud of you.  I'm only on day 3 now, but my cloudiness is fading.  Sometimes it's heavy, sometimes it's unnoticeable.  I truly envy the sleep you got.  I got about an hour max, have been trying to read or watching boring stuff on TV to make me drowsy.. none of it worked.  I've given up and decided to just come cruise around on here.  Let's get this devil out of us, I want my life back too!

[Innerstrength67]

Congrats! That's awesome. I'm trying to taper before I take the plunge on Saturday. Scared but can't live this life anymore. You are giving me hope and strength. God, how did this happen!!!
Thank you!

[Lily977]

Thanks everyone!

innerstrength- I have asked myself the same thing a lot lately!  I tapered for about two weeks before I finally took my last pill.  I really think it helped a lot.  Honestly, I have tried before and have never got this far, I always cave because I am just so miserable and sick.  This is no picnic but it is a thousand times better than going from a 150-200mg a day habit to nothing... By the time I got here this time I was only taking 15mg.  

[Innerstrength67]

Lily, it blows my mind at how many people out there are just like us. The reason I have used is to cover up emotional pain. There are a lot of people out there who started taking pills for legitimate pain but that's not my story. I'm completely blown away at how much money I have spent, how many lied I have told and how much energy has gone into keeping my addiction alive. I have tried to taper so many times and have failed. Not sure if I can fo it this time but regardless, when these pills are gone, that's it! For me aftercare is crucial. Others, like you, who truly understand what I'm going through is what is giving me strength.
Thank you for responding. I'm sooooo proud of you!!!

[Lily977]

I never had any idea how many people were in this situation either.  When I came on this board I was shocked.  It makes me wonder how many people I know personally that are just like me. I can say I started taking them for pain but I didn't.  I did hurt my knee but I could have functioned on Motrin, bottom line is I liked the way they made me feel.  I felt like I could handle my very chaotic home and work life.  My problem is I have a mother that I take care of that has everything under the sun wrong and has a legitimate reason for having any pain medicine that she needs.  That is really what got me where I am today.  Thank goodness I never went stronger than Vicodin.  Even when she was taking Morphine I never ever went there even once.  She's doing good right now and there isn't any in the house but there will be a time when there will be.  My husband will have to take over at that time and dispense them to her because I don't think I ever will be able to again.  I have lied about me, I have lied about her, you name it.  It is a terrible cycle and I just want to get out of it.  I even took my husband's pain pills when he hurt himself and he had to have Motrin.  I'm surprised he has put up with me for as long as he has.  I have to stop before I destroy my family.  I know we can do it!  I am determined this time.

[kitascloudy]

I'm on day 12 and i've been working while i was going thru wd's. The only prob i have now is RLS off and on and a cough i just picked up, Which makes me sleepy during the day. But i have to say that blah feeling and the exhausted feeling are going away. Not gone, but i could feel them leaving my body. I take a double dose of vitamins in the morning, incl B12 and Taurin. I was NEVER a vitamin popper but i am now. Stay strong your days will roll by and one morning you'll wake up and it's day 12! If i can do it, anyone can do it!

[Innerstrength67]

I just want to wake up and not panic about how many pills I have left. I have had some back issues too but Advil would have been fine. I have used Vicodin on and off for 15 years. My mothers husband is a pharmacist and I would get them from her. I, like you Lily used them because I loved how euphoric I would feel. I remember the days when I would never take any more than 2 at a time. 2 years ago that all changed. My habit got me taking up to 25-30 per day. I often think that if that first dr had said no when I first requested Vicodin for pain, this would have never happened. I take responsibility for my actions, however Drs often prescribe pain pills because they don't know what else to do. I can't even think about the lies I have told and the money I have spent. What I do know for sure is, I can't go back to who I used to be. I need to change my life, otherwise I could end up in the same mess. Thanks for listening.