Could use a "pick-me-up"

[Spike2654]

...and not in a pill format! :) Hi all, been awhile since I've logged on, I've been clean for several months now of a nasty oxy habit (all prescribed due to numerous back surgeries)..anyways, been in counseling, started an exercise routine, etc etc etc. and I feel like I've made some great choices and changed behaviors, did the "right" thing by staring down that mountain only to realize that it is made up of small pebbles and I can step over and on one small pebble at a time until I cleared the mountain. So, lately, I've felt like I've just been "floating" through life, back to "auto-pilot", which is how I used to live life on pills. Is this normal??? I guess what my whiny selfish self is saying that "is this it after all the work I've done"??? THIS is how I'm going to feel now? THIS is my new normal? and then of course that voice that has been lying dormant springs up and says "TAKE A PILL, YOU KNOW YOU'LL FEEL MUUUUUCH BETTER". Yeah, no worries, I know b/s when I hear it.

Just feeling defeated today, could use some medhelp love.

Thanks all!

[clean_in_ks]

All 3 of you are doing GREAT!!!  You're all 3 in that 3-6 month recovery timeframe.  For me.....that was the period I questioned A LOT of things...wondered if I was "permanently damaged", if my memory would every work right, if my emotions would EVER stabilize, if I would EVER have any motivation or energy again.....ALL that stuff.......but I had already promised myself that I wouldn't use opiates again "even if my butt fell off"!!

I read all I could about that particular phase of recovery....I tried to learn as much as I could as well as give back to this forum and other addicts.

You ALL are "right there".....and a "change is gonna come" (know that song?) LOL  Another change, I should say.....you are still healing.....and no you won't feel like you feel right now even a month from now.

Spike:  I miss you around here......I know you have a busy life...but I sure love to read your posts and comments.  Your sense of humor and determination....all 3 of YOU.....will take you far.

Blessings to you all 3~
Connie  

[takingmylifeback2014]

On to better days Girls!!! We will get there we are going at a turtle pace but I know all will be great when we do get to the other side of the rainbow .....haha

[nonights]

Continually on guard for that head talking that crap. Isn't life better. Im anxious to be better right now too but if every day I make progress its better. This time is just the tip of the iceberg for us. On to better and better.

[Spike2654]

woohoo, my other girl!!

hey  nonights, I know, right? SHUT THE F UP!! for reals. see, I'm smiling now, needed you ladies to remind me of that blunt truth! :)

[nonights]

Hey Spike. Just look at how far you've come. That head of yours is talking but you know it so tell it to shut the fu up.

[Spike2654]

oh man, I sure hope so!!! So glad you are with me on this seemingly endless roller coaster ride!! definitely better than the physical w/d days, no doubt, but seriously, there are all kinds of vitamins, hot showers, epsoms, all those things to deal with the physical side of wd, but man, the emotional side STINKS!!! especially with the level of patience I have, lol, like, I want to feel awesome NOW...

hats off to ya friend!! I know you are with me on this journey!

[takingmylifeback2014]

I feel the same way girl! We just gotta stick it out. They say 6 months is a huge turning point, Damn I hope LOL
It will get better :-)