ok...withdrawls. Need to post.

[starshine7]

I've gone through about 3 withdrawls now...MAJOR sick ones. And I truly am sick of myself and my life. It's disgusting to pay for something that is killing/ hurting you. I appreciate the friends I have on here sooo much:Bubby, Chris, Robert are lifesavors....listening when you don't want to listen to yourself!

So, struggling and scared as always, but dealing with bipolar symptoms that I'm kinda scared of. I haven't had the mania in awhile and the DEEP depression...it seemed to disappear the minute I took a handful of pills...

I hope this is normal and will fade. I have either good or bad moments...no in between...

Everyone is an inspiration on here...Just want this to be over. I know the drills, but I just am soo afraid of relapse...

[starshine7]

again you are amazing, thank you so much for caring :)

[ActingBrandNew]

I know its hard dealing with depression and staying clean...most of us use to "take care" of the depression....and I totally get when you said "I have either good or bad moments...no in between... " Im still like that...cant seem to find that happy medium.

There's a lot of things being clean will fix....but there's some things we will just have to learn how to live with. You will get there eventually if you stay the course. Above you said you hope that this is normal and it will fade....it may or may not....but you have to be proactive in fighting against those feelings instead of just hoping they...eventually disappear.

Im rooting for you and have a strong feeling that you can and will do this!

God Bless

[starshine7]

lol yeah! just my luck...Maybe it's nature??I mean of course I used the pills to control menstrual pain? And I also just had it about 2 and a half weeks ago...kinda early..

[knaankj]

now that is just insult to injury  :)  hang in there!!  
Paige

[starshine7]

well,still struggling and NOW I have my monthly deal! wow, could it get any more painful lol??owww

[SmilingBright]

Praying for u my sweet Karen!!  U can do this!!!   Hope u r ok

[FourJays]

Karen - you can do this.  Think positive and look forward.  This is a new day, a new start.  Don't look back.  It IS hard work, but the future rewards are worth every single minute of discomfort you may go through.  Just keep pushing.....and posting :))

[SmilingBright]

Anything worth having is hard to get!!!!  We can do this!!!!  

[starshine7]

Hope so..really do. It's gonna take a lot of work....

[SmilingBright]

Correction I will be at 1,000 and u will be right there behind me!!! ;)

[starshine7]

chris you know your getting to 1,000, correct?lol

[starshine7]

Thanks chris. Always said that i love your posts..lol you'll be at 1,0000 and I'll be at 1 but maybe Finally I can get it right :)

[SmilingBright]

U are doing  this.   Take this one day at a time sweetheart!!!!!!   you can do this!!!   I know it's hard.  But just rem what you are fighting for!!!!  It will be so worth it just to be clean and free from all the pills and worrying about getting them or paying for them.  Your Freedom is here!!!  

We can do this and beat this together!!!!!!!!  
Keep posting sweetheart!!!  Hugs!!!!!!