Oh so tired of this addiction to Hydros

[aTtHeEnD]

Here we go again! I have been down this road many times already. Trying to get off this medication is almost hell in of it's self. Here's my story....I need all the help I can get right not - especially support from those here I think, I know.

I have been on Hydrocodone 10/500 for several years now. At 1st took them as prescribed and maintained level of intake for some time that way. Like most here, when the pain was gone the pills just kept getting taken. Then moved on to taking double, ya know cause it was not just doing the job with prescribed amount. So it started! 1st it would take 2 weeks to go thru 90 10/500, then down to 90 in about 5 days...Keeping in mind this took place over the past few years.Last week I got the 90 and realized they were being gone in that many days - REALLY opened my eyes that time I think. Anyway, In the time waiting to get refills I would pay to get them off the street at four bucks a pop and my intake level - it was getting ugly ugly. The past few weeks though I have been getting tired early, loss of appetite and so on - almost like I was already withdrawling - yet I was still taking them "weird" Yesterday, woke up still had about 11 and took last one last night at 1045 (ya I remember) Here is the thing, i WANT OUT of this hell! I hate spending the money, looking for them, the problems physically, mentally and so on. TIRED OF IT. I sit here this morning taking the only day off I can take this week, and its not even been 24hrs yet. I can only sit and wait for the WD's to kick in. Scares the tarnation out of me to be honest. I have told no one but you folks there - It's ALL i can tell. I can prob tell my Dr. though if needed. I have had calls the past few days asking me do I want more, and never returned call or text - I guess knowing I'm sick of it, I mean really really sick of it. I want to be me again, If I even know who that person is - it's been so damn long. Kinda scares me too really.
In the end (JUST FIGURED IT OUT) i took almost 18 daily. I knew too tho at time. Didnt want to fush them, so just banged them out - knowing I would deal with this day - Today. I would like some advise, maybe inspiration of some kind. Things I can take to ease the pain of WD's - Anything I get would be heaven sent really. I have no one to count on here, that I can tell right now. I have to work tomorrow so - Help

I really want out of this mess, mentally I think it's time

[aTtHeEnD]

Thanks guys/gals, It helps to know I'm not a lone in this. What's worse is the waiting for the actual hell to begin, and it's close "I can tell" I loaded up on Bananas and some other fruits, Vitamin waters . However, I have high blood pressure and know there are issues with the recipe below and the Pressure. I'm outside all day long at my job - pretty much walking around for the entire 8. Not sure how It will be tomorrow day 1.5 really. I just hope I can eat and have enough energy to get by till its all over cause taking too much time off is not even an option - especially these days and the job market. I make good money now and dont wanna ruin it. I am hopefull I can do this - in fact I know I can with some support - This addiction has had me in it's palms for too many years and now I just want to kick it's a** in, heh. God I hope the WD's don't kill me for god sakes. I hear they wont - Im rambling so all the support I can get would be helpful. Thank you to those who have already commented - that has already helped too - I love this place! It's the only one of it's kind out there. Thank you, thank you so so much -  

[thirdtimer3]

Expect Hell.  But it will pass...I promise.  Somehow I am on Day 10.  I don't even know how I got here.  Day 2-5 are a blurr, but here I am. I will help you if I can.  The advise here is good.  keep reading and sleep if you can.  Benedryl and immodium help with the sleep and the stomach stuff. Stay with us.

[HR_PuffnStuff]

You sound like you are very ready to be done and that is a good thing. The more you read these posts (old and new) you will find a lot of helpful hints about what to expect and what you can try and do to ease the w/d. As most people on here will tell you...look in the bottom right hand corner of this page and you will see the Thomas Recipe which can help with w/d. Also try really hot baths to help with aches and pains, lots of bananas to help with restless leg. Drink lots of water to flush your system, Immodium AD to help with the lovely bathroom issues, force yourself to take walks as exercise helps. I know you have to work through this and that is never easy. Maybe you can take today to read and post, gather some ingrediants to help you through, and mentally prepare. I know for me that just knowing there were others out there going through it too helped immensely. I would go for walks and think "right now there are people on the forum who are feeling exactly like me....I am not alone." I will say a prayer for you and please keep reading and posting. We are here for you.