In for a rough day, I think

[Pat1956100]

I took my last 2 percs 48 hours ago.  Yup if you have them you will take them.  I have never been able to flush.  They are way too expensive.  I still haven't even paid for them yet so I couldn't flush them.
I did a quick taper so I guess I am officially starting day 3.  I know my tracker says day 2 but my body says day 3.
I will not call for any more percs.  
I will not be a stupid jerk.
I will not ever do this again.
because I like this new Pat I am.

I still am feeling so strong about this and so happy.  I spoke with all my family yesterday because they called for my birthday and it just made me feel so strong.  We talked about my future, selling my house and moving and I have all their support.  It just felt so good to be clean.  Everyone said how GOOD I sounded.
Just need to get through this and get my energy back.  So much to do.

[ImDONENoMore]

Right.  Dana has a good suggestion.. 30 days compared to the rest of your life?  Honestly, pat, there is no way you could do that?  I'm not sure I fully understand the urgency behind selling your home.  And like I mentioned earlier, you have no guarantees it will sell in two months.  What's another month of your time to be well for the REST of your life?  Please, give that some real thought.

Maybe you could rent your home for the time you're away?  Any family connections/friends (trustworthy) who could maintain your home for you while you're away?

[Pat1956100]

Well the addiction counselor will know about the rehabs.  He is who I have to see if I wanted to go to rehab and they have all different ones all over the province.  Different amount of days etc.
I will find out when I call or when I see him if they have 30 days ones.
That is doable.  I would LOVE that.  Great Idea.

[Dane74]

you can do 30 days!!!!!  Your life depends on it Pat!!! You know the saying, where there is a will there is a way!!!!!

[Pat1956100]

I would LOVE to go to rehab.  I watch intervention and wish it was me they were doing the intervention on.  I wish someone would swoop me up and take me there.
I just can't go away for 90 days right now.  I have too many obligations that I absolutley HAVE to deal with and ImDone is right again, I don't feel up to it but I have to.  I would come back to a house with the power cut off and the pipes burst from freezing.

[Dane74]

Did you ever consider rehab? I do not want to scare you, i remember when bama first told me, Dana i think you need rehab, i freaked out, i was scared $h!t, but it was what i needed and all my friends on here pushed me, and i hated to hear it, but it was what i needed.  Just think about all you options, you cant do it your way anymore, its has not been working, you have to dive into this head on.  I know the shame in admitting your addiction, i still have the shame but really who gives a rip what the others think, we have an illness and need help and the "brave" thing to do is reach out and ask.  Like i mentioned to you before its time to put on your armor vest!!!

[Pat1956100]

I know.  I have had 10 days clean and 2 weeks clean and then 3 days or 4 days or 5 days.  I have gone thru these withdrawals so many times I am becoming an expert on them.
It is so easy to relapse, way too easy if you are exposed to them and I can remember after 2 weeks taking them and feeling sick.  It didn't stop me though.  
I want to do it the right way this time and be open minded to what I have to do.  I know you are all right.  I am very scared of it but I know you are right.  ImDone is right I have to be brave and those words are giving me the courage to do this.
Right now it is taking all my strength to get up and go to the lady's room.
I have to hang onto bed posts and walls to get there.