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Kicking the 30mg Roxi
Ok well I've been trying to quit off an on for the past 4 months or so. Let me say. Hardest thing ever. I tried deleting all the numbers in my phone as im not prescribed them. Doesn't help especially when I have one memorized... Anyways I've been doin this for a year now. Just like everyone, started off smaller and got to the 30s. I've always had pain for the past 4 or 5 years and I have a high tolerance to pills. Even when I wasn't doing these, OTC meds couldn't help a headache I had. That was always my excuse when going to the doctor. I NEED to quit. I am going BROKE! I have made a good amount of money since the beginning of the year but have nothing to show for it. I'm living paycheck to paycheck.
Let me start off, I'm 22 and I've been smoking weed for about 8 years. On and off. I never had an addictive personality. Could stop weed for months at a time to pee clean. Stopped smoking cigs a few times. I'm actually 6 weeks clean from cigs right now. But I can't kick the pill habit. I did quit when I went to Cali for 4 months but that's because I didn't know anyone. My problem is I work at 5 am mon-fri and it helps me. Greatly. I don't feel normal unless I'm on them. Like I said, I have pain and always have. Been in and out of doctor with MRI and X-ray. Maybe it was the doctors I went to but they either seemed to not care or honestly didn't find anything. But I hurt! And with me being busy all the time I don't have time for physic therapy or anything like that. So the pills are the easiest thing there is. I've taken 150mg a day. And as little as 15mg a day to even skipping a day. I can usually get to day 3 of cold turkey then I give in an it starts all over. Got to day 3. Then got 2 in sat. And 4 on Sunday. And now I'm back in the same boat. I'm tired. Mentally. I can't do this anymore. I've read a lot of these things but like I said. I don't have time for anything else because of my job. And I can't quit or take a break that's not an option. I'm out of ideas. the weed does help me get my mind off of it when I don't have any sometimes. But weed as a painkiller, yeah right. It intesifies it if anything. We do have medical marijuana where I live but I just don't see me gettin it for that reason. I will be active on this post so feel free to ask questions. I appreciate all the help I can get. Thank you.
Let me start off, I'm 22 and I've been smoking weed for about 8 years. On and off. I never had an addictive personality. Could stop weed for months at a time to pee clean. Stopped smoking cigs a few times. I'm actually 6 weeks clean from cigs right now. But I can't kick the pill habit. I did quit when I went to Cali for 4 months but that's because I didn't know anyone. My problem is I work at 5 am mon-fri and it helps me. Greatly. I don't feel normal unless I'm on them. Like I said, I have pain and always have. Been in and out of doctor with MRI and X-ray. Maybe it was the doctors I went to but they either seemed to not care or honestly didn't find anything. But I hurt! And with me being busy all the time I don't have time for physic therapy or anything like that. So the pills are the easiest thing there is. I've taken 150mg a day. And as little as 15mg a day to even skipping a day. I can usually get to day 3 of cold turkey then I give in an it starts all over. Got to day 3. Then got 2 in sat. And 4 on Sunday. And now I'm back in the same boat. I'm tired. Mentally. I can't do this anymore. I've read a lot of these things but like I said. I don't have time for anything else because of my job. And I can't quit or take a break that's not an option. I'm out of ideas. the weed does help me get my mind off of it when I don't have any sometimes. But weed as a painkiller, yeah right. It intesifies it if anything. We do have medical marijuana where I live but I just don't see me gettin it for that reason. I will be active on this post so feel free to ask questions. I appreciate all the help I can get. Thank you.
Hi Ryan.
I am a Roxie oxy abuser myself. So I complely understand your situation. Completely. I began taking loratabs then percs then oxy and roxie....
It's very very hard to stop this addiction. I know. I've been addicted for almost eight years. I used to chase pills around. From doctors to drug dealers. I'd go crazy with my scripts then go out on the streets looking for that stuff. Or I'd have to go thru withdrawals and wait it out until my next script. And my husband was rxed morphine so I'd just bounce on his pills. I was so so scared to let go of my drugs. I was so scared of the sickness that always came. I didnt have the patience to wait It out. And the mental cravings and depression that I knew would follow was tourture to even think about.....
One day I was so sick of this life that I had found myself in I took a big deep breathe and jumped. I was really ready. Cant explain it. It just bugged my Inner soul to do another day with this drug. I had no soul left. I was so empty Inside. So I jumped.
I was so sick I couldnt stand up for a week. Then the depression set in. But I was ready. I bought books on addiction. I went to meetings. I went to counseling. I was open to try anything. To save mysoul. My life. And all of this together worked. It wasn't easy. At all. But nothing really is.... I wanted to have an instant fix. We all do. We all want to feel normal right now. That's not possible. Because we didn't get sick in a day. And this is a disease. A life time on. And yes it can be managed.
Another thing is finding out why you needed to escape. What's going on insinde your head?? Because taking drugs or popping pills is a cover up. There's something bugging you on a deeper level. Stress....trauma....hurt....pain.....depression...something.
To really get clean and stay clean takes work. Real work. And you've got to be willing to do the work.
I'm 121 days clean today. When I jumped I was at 360 mgs of oxies. So I completely ilunderstand.
Just wanted to let you know your not alone.
Just because you got lost doesn't make you a looser.
Welcome to the family were all here to support you.
I am a Roxie oxy abuser myself. So I complely understand your situation. Completely. I began taking loratabs then percs then oxy and roxie....
It's very very hard to stop this addiction. I know. I've been addicted for almost eight years. I used to chase pills around. From doctors to drug dealers. I'd go crazy with my scripts then go out on the streets looking for that stuff. Or I'd have to go thru withdrawals and wait it out until my next script. And my husband was rxed morphine so I'd just bounce on his pills. I was so so scared to let go of my drugs. I was so scared of the sickness that always came. I didnt have the patience to wait It out. And the mental cravings and depression that I knew would follow was tourture to even think about.....
One day I was so sick of this life that I had found myself in I took a big deep breathe and jumped. I was really ready. Cant explain it. It just bugged my Inner soul to do another day with this drug. I had no soul left. I was so empty Inside. So I jumped.
I was so sick I couldnt stand up for a week. Then the depression set in. But I was ready. I bought books on addiction. I went to meetings. I went to counseling. I was open to try anything. To save mysoul. My life. And all of this together worked. It wasn't easy. At all. But nothing really is.... I wanted to have an instant fix. We all do. We all want to feel normal right now. That's not possible. Because we didn't get sick in a day. And this is a disease. A life time on. And yes it can be managed.
Another thing is finding out why you needed to escape. What's going on insinde your head?? Because taking drugs or popping pills is a cover up. There's something bugging you on a deeper level. Stress....trauma....hurt....pain.....depression...something.
To really get clean and stay clean takes work. Real work. And you've got to be willing to do the work.
I'm 121 days clean today. When I jumped I was at 360 mgs of oxies. So I completely ilunderstand.
Just wanted to let you know your not alone.
Just because you got lost doesn't make you a looser.
Welcome to the family were all here to support you.
hello ryan and welcome.
i cry as i read your post. you are 22, my daughter is 21. she started using roxys (blues) 2 years ago. opiates change your brain chemistry. she becomes a totally different person on them. they dont give her energy, they make her nod, they make her nasty, belligerent,
argumentative,her whole personality and her countenance change.she turns against those that she loves.
she stops for a couple months and then she too starts again.
oxys are the devil. she also snorted them, the same people she was using with now shoot them.
believe me ryan when it comes to these pills dont say never. they control you, your every thought and action eventually.
my daughter and my oldest son who is 26 have known at least 8 people over the course of 3 years who have died from these pills. my daughter says she is in control. those other people were stupid and didnt know what they were doing.
please ryan get the help you need to get this monkey off your back once and for all. it will literally save your life. go for counseling,support groups. intensive outpatient,church,talk to a clergy, stay away from the people,places and all things associated with your use.
it is a matter of life and death. you never mentioned what kind of pain you have? have you tried alternate pain management besides the opiates?
sending prayers,support,encouragment and hope.
debbie
i cry as i read your post. you are 22, my daughter is 21. she started using roxys (blues) 2 years ago. opiates change your brain chemistry. she becomes a totally different person on them. they dont give her energy, they make her nod, they make her nasty, belligerent,
argumentative,her whole personality and her countenance change.she turns against those that she loves.
she stops for a couple months and then she too starts again.
oxys are the devil. she also snorted them, the same people she was using with now shoot them.
believe me ryan when it comes to these pills dont say never. they control you, your every thought and action eventually.
my daughter and my oldest son who is 26 have known at least 8 people over the course of 3 years who have died from these pills. my daughter says she is in control. those other people were stupid and didnt know what they were doing.
please ryan get the help you need to get this monkey off your back once and for all. it will literally save your life. go for counseling,support groups. intensive outpatient,church,talk to a clergy, stay away from the people,places and all things associated with your use.
it is a matter of life and death. you never mentioned what kind of pain you have? have you tried alternate pain management besides the opiates?
sending prayers,support,encouragment and hope.
debbie
There is no normal as long as you use, it's all fake, trust me you are very young and this is a patient addiction, it will sneak up on you and make you do things you never thought possible, I never thought I would snort, and Thank GOD, I didn't, but I entertained the idea.. So please be careful, we care more than you know, Have you started the process of W/d yet?
Thank you guys for responding so fast. And Bryan. I hear exactly what you are saying. It is something I wish I never picked up. But it's the easy way out of pain and sometimes people feel that's the only way for them. Including me. All I know i need is time. And that is something I feel I
don't have. If in feeling horrible from withdrawals. I know that a solution is only a phone call away.
And that's what I need to get rid of!
And I don't see a dr for them. I get them from "friends". And yeah snorting is as far as I would go though. Even though I'm a diabetic and I use needles all day, I could NEVER see myself shootin. Or even going to harder drugs. It's just something that I actually do have the will power to stay away from. I've thought about this stuff hard and for a long time. At first it was, I'm not addicted, I'm just doing this because i want to. Now it's that I'm not chasing the "high" I'm just tryin to feel normal the easiest and quickest way I know.
I do appreciate the love on this site though. Thank you again. I hope to get more opinions and suggestions as time goes on.
don't have. If in feeling horrible from withdrawals. I know that a solution is only a phone call away.
And that's what I need to get rid of!
And I don't see a dr for them. I get them from "friends". And yeah snorting is as far as I would go though. Even though I'm a diabetic and I use needles all day, I could NEVER see myself shootin. Or even going to harder drugs. It's just something that I actually do have the will power to stay away from. I've thought about this stuff hard and for a long time. At first it was, I'm not addicted, I'm just doing this because i want to. Now it's that I'm not chasing the "high" I'm just tryin to feel normal the easiest and quickest way I know.
I do appreciate the love on this site though. Thank you again. I hope to get more opinions and suggestions as time goes on.
You got alot going on, first Congratulations and welcome! Do you get these Roxis legally or other ways?? Do you see a Dr? Sorry for questions,
You definatley do not need to snort, you are destroying your sinus, your brain as well as your body, and being a diabetic, you are taking an awful chance.. Please see a Dr.. And explain your problems.. Please don't snort, if you don't get rid of this next step is shooting, to get the high your searching for. You are too young to live this way, life is just beginning for you!! Praying for you!
You definatley do not need to snort, you are destroying your sinus, your brain as well as your body, and being a diabetic, you are taking an awful chance.. Please see a Dr.. And explain your problems.. Please don't snort, if you don't get rid of this next step is shooting, to get the high your searching for. You are too young to live this way, life is just beginning for you!! Praying for you!
Ryan,
I need to be blunt here. Your in the fight of your life. The opiates will kill you brother. You gotta keep fighting. I am 41, have some serious body pain issues, no need for the details. What I can tell you is that if you can get 30-45 days off of this junk your pain will get better. Your mind is screaming for opium, and increases in pain.......rebound pain......is very common. It will get better mentally, but you gotta get some distance.
You cannot compare the opiates to other stuff either. I have never been an addict until I got that taste of opium. Alcohol, weed for 20 years......could take it or leave it. These drugs work on our mind differently, and for some of us opiates are the lever that we cannot control. Hang in there.
Bryan
I need to be blunt here. Your in the fight of your life. The opiates will kill you brother. You gotta keep fighting. I am 41, have some serious body pain issues, no need for the details. What I can tell you is that if you can get 30-45 days off of this junk your pain will get better. Your mind is screaming for opium, and increases in pain.......rebound pain......is very common. It will get better mentally, but you gotta get some distance.
You cannot compare the opiates to other stuff either. I have never been an addict until I got that taste of opium. Alcohol, weed for 20 years......could take it or leave it. These drugs work on our mind differently, and for some of us opiates are the lever that we cannot control. Hang in there.
Bryan
Oh and one last thing....I dont know how it slipped my mind. I am a type 1 diabetic. Have been since I was 14. So my body is already going through enough stuff as it is. Adding this only makes it worse!
Oh yeah. I snort them also Unfortunatly. Never pop em. Even tho nether is good.
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