Many Struggles today~

[dominosarah]

I saw so many people struggling today.  My question is why didnt anyone post a thread on the forum.  This is a "we" thing, not an "i" thing.  Cravings are a very difficult thing and should be taken seriously.  This needs to be talked about as it helps us all.

[ariley13]

I know that. It's just my stubborness I guess. (BTW, I was blessed to have a not so bad day yesterday. Last week was my bad time.) I am working every day on the stubborn thing and trying to get un-set in my ways . If I don't, it will be my downfall, and I know it.  Thank you for posting this Sarah.

[HappyDays2Come]

To be honest I always think that I shouldn't post the bad things on here because I'm afraid that someone will see that I have over 30 days and am still struggling and that will make them NOT want to stop/quit. Does that make sense? I know that being open and honest is the best but I guess I'm fearful that I'll scare off a lurker or someone that is on the brink of quitting because they'll think "oh no, she's still having w/d symptoms at 30 days!!!"

[ricart70]

I need to remember that ! Thanks Sarah !  I always try to reach out to at least one person but it is better to reach out to all. At my meetings we are "not allowed to talk about problems" so this is pretty much the place I go to for that and I am thankful for this place because of that.

[nursegirl6572]

I think it's better to put the God's honest factual truth out there.  The beauty of this forum, when people are participating, posting about where they're at in their recovery, the people reading can see it all...they can easily look at someone's id and follow their posts, see their experience.  They see the posts congratulating people on their clean times, and they see the ones that represent someone struggling.  The struggling is all too real, and the GREAT thing is that they get to see the replies of others, helping that person problem solve and cope.  THAT is priceless.

The thing about having those convos in statuses is that they're not as visible...especially to a new member.  A new member isn't going to pay attention to the statuses like the ones who have been around longer would.  They will be browsing and posting in the forum.  Also, the posts will show up in internet searches...there are people even BEYOND MH that everyone here is helping by sharing their battle.  

I think at this point, people's knee jerk reactions is to post most things in statuses, versus on the forum or in journals, etc, it's just a snowball effect.    I hate to think that valuable info that others could benefit from (including the author) may get lost in the shuffle, because that's exactly what happens when the statuses are used as the primary way to communicate IMO.  

The cool thing about MH is that there are so many different features that apply to different situations.  The journal feature can be used to share longer, more informative posts, or diary type entries...and there's the option to comment on the journals, which is cool.  I've seen loads of journals (look at the tram ones)...where people have their own convo about something going.  The Social side of this forum is a great place to let your hair down, have some fun, or just chit chat.  There are also user groups which are set up like the forums, but are started by and moderated by members.  That can be a neat way to communicate too.  MY personal opinion is that the statuses are most appropriate as a way to either draw attention to something, like "Check out my pics", or to post brief things, with brief comments, like inspirational quotes, or a little diddy on how you're doing.  The statuses have a pretty short word limit, and when you start seeing people have to post 3 or 4 times in a row on a status to reply, you have to wonder if that's the most appropriate kind of place to be having those discussions.  

Sarah, God love her, cares SO much about this place and everyone in it.  You guys are all awesome, wonderful loving giving people.  I know sarah worries that people are going to start falling through the cracks.  It's a genuine concern because people AREN'T interacting or reaching out like usual in the usual places.  Everything is happening on status updates, it's impossible to follow, and the sidebar only holds so many alerts as to what statuses are going, and the people on the forum, who aren't looking at those statuses either cannot help, or cannot reach out.  Plus, if someone DOES happen to post a status update reaching out, it's buried within minutes.

I say all of the above with all due respect, this is just my opinion. I'm not judging anyone, or telling anyone what they should do, not in any way shape or form.  I worry too.  I want to see people get the very most out of this place, and my HONEST opinion is, right now, people aren't.

Hugs to you all!!  XOXO

[meegWpaw]

well im at work so this will get short shrift for now but I and some people I know have talked about feeling reluctant to post about hard times especially if we've done it a lot in the past or if we have/had some time ... like feel bad about it, and people are tired of it ... etc. --mp

[VICourageous]

Well I am like HappyDay2Come. Do to my time frame I did not want to discourage a Lurker or a New One. I have read on here that some do not crave any more and others will forever. I think we all our different in some areas. Just like I do not wake up and think of a drink. Have not drank in over 8 years but that concert a couple of months triggered me a bit. My Cravings come when I get my Compulsive Behavior kicks in to want to get ALL my work done at once. I am not used to just taking the day off or getting a bit done here and there, this turns into frustration and kicks in cravings to get wired up. I have Did a Big Change on this but yesterday at my 345d it just hit me hard. There where some MH friends that stayed with me for hours and walked me right through it..Today is a New Day and I thank them ALL for being there for me..I love Yas!!!!!!
Bless U All
Vickie